2 weeks post lumpectomy, still so sore, and other questions

dianehelen

So today is 2 weeks since my lumpecomy surgery. I saw the surgeon last week for my 10 day follow up, and he says all is healing well. Well if he says so, but WHY am I still so sore? In fact at times it seems Im going backwards. At first the whole area was almost numb, but as the days go on, I have a really annoying soreness right around the nipple area. A friend mentioned, is the soreness near where they did the sentinel node dye injection, and I believe it is. Can be be delayed pain from that? Its really annoying. It seems to be most annoying when wearing no bra and it just sorta hangs down. But I hate wearing a bra, its not comfortable either, so Im damned if I do/dont kinda thing. I hate sleeping in a bra, but seems I have to. I did buy a front close cup sized sports bra, which is a bit less uncomfortable to sleep in that my regular one, but even so, I just never seem to be able to really relax. I cant sleep on my left side at all, which is how I usually sleep, and on my right side, I can only last a few mintues, as gravity seems to pull stuff down. Also, the incision where they took the nodes is still very sore, and when I lay my arm at my side, its also very uncomfortable, and I cant really relax.

Speaking of the node area incision, any idea why, even tho the incision is on the "body" side of my underarm, I have really annoying soreness on the underside of the "arm" side of that area, which is not really that near where the incision is.

Next area of struggle and annoynance is dealing with this intense sadness and depression I cant seem to shake. I have never dealt with this, in fact I have never been sick and until now have lead a pretty great life, so this is such new territory to me. When I was really freaking out before surgery, my obgyn, the surgeon, the RO and MO, all refused to give my anything for the intense anxiety, let alone depression. They all suggested I see a pysch. The RO office made an appointment for me, with a pychtrst on my insurance, and near my home. I went to the apppt, and was apalled to find a 100degree HOT office packed with about 20 people, YES 20, in a steamy office, waiting for a psychiatrist! I asked the recpt how long the wait was, and she said over an hour???? Have you EVER heard of this, especially for this kind of medical person? I was just appalled and left.

I went back and called all the docs involoved and begged for at least something short term to deal with the anxiety, and finally after begging the surgeons office nurse, who took pity on my, talked the the doc, and he was able to call in a SEVEN pill Rx for Xanax. It did help, take some of the edge off, at least before the dye injection and the surgery. But when I went back he said no more I need someone else to manage that.

I dont really have a PCP because Im never sick, and when I am I just go to the urgent care clinic, so that was not an option.

So last week I spent hours on the phone trying to find a psych that is on my plan, taking new patients, near ish my house and could see me soon. It took about 8 calls, to finally get one. This is just so NOT right. But anyway I have an appt for Wednesday, lets see how that goes.

Lastly today I am calling for an appt for a 2nd opinion for an oncologist. The ones (RO and MO) I have seen were ok, but associated with a hospital that is 45 mins from my house, and not that , that is the only concern, but to be closer seems to have some benefit. So I called my former across the street neighbor who I know used to be an oncology nurse. Well she was most helpful and is not the chief of nursing at Celebration Hospital, which also has a very well respected cancer center. She referred me to an onc that she says is very good, so I will see what he has to say.

OK, sorry to have rambled on so much, this is still all such horror and shock to me, to have to be dealing with this, but this board reminds me that I am not alone in this horrific journey.

Thanks for anyone who reads and responds

Diane

PatFried

Pillow
Diane I used a pillow for quite a while under my effected arm.. I used it when I sat. I used it while riding in the car for a while. It just cushioned that arm. I even used it in bed. It just gave more support to that side of my body. I was told to wear a bra for at least two weeks. Sometimes the bra rubbed against the incision so I just put some gauge between the two. I also spent a lot of time sleeping in the recliner. Now I'm back in bed and everything is ok .
Thinking of you
Pat

Eleanor1

Hi Diane...oh how I can
Hi Diane...oh how I can understand your concern. I too felt a lot of sadness and depression. After i was diagnosed, for the first 2-3 weeks, I would cry all day and then stop crying before my husband and kids come home and pretend I am ok. For my family and my extended family, I am always the doer, their adviser, the giver since I am in the medical field. They never saw me sick, weak, helpless .. But I am so glad that they all reached out for me. I still cry every now and then. I still get depressed every now and then but I now forced myself to get up, to go with the flow and try to get stronger everyday because I slowly realized that I need to finished this journey soon so I can live again. What I found out was as long as I could get enough sleep at night I will be ok the following day, I would be much rested and less anxious. I was over thinking so much before my chemo but once I started chemo, all thoughts were directed to it. I just want to finish now, then move to radiation and hopefully go back to work someday somehow. My sister saw me for the first time without hair yesterday and she took it so hard I ended up the one telling her its ok, it will grow back. I learned to have to take things step by step now, still learning that its ok if things are not perfect, and its ok if I don't pleased everyone sometimes, that its ok if I don't answer the phone sometimes and just be me. Things will get better....

dianehelen

Eleanor1 said:

Hi Diane...oh how I can
Hi Diane...oh how I can understand your concern. I too felt a lot of sadness and depression. After i was diagnosed, for the first 2-3 weeks, I would cry all day and then stop crying before my husband and kids come home and pretend I am ok. For my family and my extended family, I am always the doer, their adviser, the giver since I am in the medical field. They never saw me sick, weak, helpless .. But I am so glad that they all reached out for me. I still cry every now and then. I still get depressed every now and then but I now forced myself to get up, to go with the flow and try to get stronger everyday because I slowly realized that I need to finished this journey soon so I can live again. What I found out was as long as I could get enough sleep at night I will be ok the following day, I would be much rested and less anxious. I was over thinking so much before my chemo but once I started chemo, all thoughts were directed to it. I just want to finish now, then move to radiation and hopefully go back to work someday somehow. My sister saw me for the first time without hair yesterday and she took it so hard I ended up the one telling her its ok, it will grow back. I learned to have to take things step by step now, still learning that its ok if things are not perfect, and its ok if I don't pleased everyone sometimes, that its ok if I don't answer the phone sometimes and just be me. Things will get better....

Thanks Eleanor.. day at a
Thanks Eleanor.. day at a time
May I just say, your new picture avatars, you are really gorgeous, i can see why you did not want to give up that beautiful hair..

All the best to you, hope your next round is well tolerated

abrub

It took weeks for the pain from surgery to go away.
Here I am, 9 weeks out from lumpectomy (7 weeks out from follow-up surgery to place drains) and I still get shots of pain in the breast. A lot of work was done in there - the incision does not reflect what was actually done.

I wore a bra round the clock for about 5 weeks, as gravity was not my friend. It HURT. I got some thick surgical sponges to put between my incision and my bra for extra padding.

I can't believe that your drs are so unsupportive that they won't give you anti-anxiety meds. My drs made sure I had anything I needed for pain control, sleep and/or anxiety. Perhaps it is time to find a primary care to work for you; you need someone in your corner, and not just a psychiatrist.

I hope your appointment on Weds goes well; that you have found an understanding, competent shrink. (Mine is worth a million dollars to me - he has emotionally held my hand through my cancer ordeals, and just been there for me.)

Wishing you the best,

Alice

dianehelen

abrub said:

It took weeks for the pain from surgery to go away.
Here I am, 9 weeks out from lumpectomy (7 weeks out from follow-up surgery to place drains) and I still get shots of pain in the breast. A lot of work was done in there - the incision does not reflect what was actually done.

I wore a bra round the clock for about 5 weeks, as gravity was not my friend. It HURT. I got some thick surgical sponges to put between my incision and my bra for extra padding.

I can't believe that your drs are so unsupportive that they won't give you anti-anxiety meds. My drs made sure I had anything I needed for pain control, sleep and/or anxiety. Perhaps it is time to find a primary care to work for you; you need someone in your corner, and not just a psychiatrist.

I hope your appointment on Weds goes well; that you have found an understanding, competent shrink. (Mine is worth a million dollars to me - he has emotionally held my hand through my cancer ordeals, and just been there for me.)

Wishing you the best,

Alice

You hit the nail on the
You hit the nail on the head! It's the gravity thing ugh.
I wish i could find a bra that i can feel comfortable in all day. Taking that off at the end of the day was always my ahhhh moment.

abrub

dianehelen said:

You hit the nail on the
You hit the nail on the head! It's the gravity thing ugh.
I wish i could find a bra that i can feel comfortable in all day. Taking that off at the end of the day was always my ahhhh moment.

Try the stretchy "Made for TV" bras
I have a couple of the "Genie" bras which have been good for sleeping (and you can get them anywhere - CVS, the supermarket - any place that has the "As Seen On TV" section.)

I found I needed a larger size than their recommendation, and took the 3XL, tho according to their size chart, I should definitely have fit into 2XL or smaller. (I'm a 16W or 18W top; 42DDD). They give just enough support and are soft and stretchy.

Yes, I'm with you - I could never wait to take off my bra at the end of the day. I'm glad I can finally go braless (around the house) again.

Wishing you a quick return to your Ahhhhhh moments!

dianehelen

abrub said:

Try the stretchy "Made for TV" bras
I have a couple of the "Genie" bras which have been good for sleeping (and you can get them anywhere - CVS, the supermarket - any place that has the "As Seen On TV" section.)

I found I needed a larger size than their recommendation, and took the 3XL, tho according to their size chart, I should definitely have fit into 2XL or smaller. (I'm a 16W or 18W top; 42DDD). They give just enough support and are soft and stretchy.

Yes, I'm with you - I could never wait to take off my bra at the end of the day. I'm glad I can finally go braless (around the house) again.

Wishing you a quick return to your Ahhhhhh moments!

I don't think they come big
I don't think they come big enough for me, and my 46 dd girls

I just ordered something from herroom.com , let's see if that helps

Hmm looking at genie, just maybe the 4x would work?

Thanks for tip alice

abrub

dianehelen said:

I don't think they come big
I don't think they come big enough for me, and my 46 dd girls

I just ordered something from herroom.com , let's see if that helps

Hmm looking at genie, just maybe the 4x would work?

Thanks for tip alice

Lane Bryant also has some comfortable bras
without underwire! I've also worn those day and night.

4X Genie should work - I'm actually between 42 and 44 DDD

dianehelen

abrub said:

Lane Bryant also has some comfortable bras
without underwire! I've also worn those day and night.

4X Genie should work - I'm actually between 42 and 44 DDD

Ya i never wear underwire
Ya i never wear underwire bras, hate em

Ok ordered the 3pk genie 4x lets see

Eleanor1

dianehelen said:

Thanks Eleanor.. day at a
Thanks Eleanor.. day at a time
May I just say, your new picture avatars, you are really gorgeous, i can see why you did not want to give up that beautiful hair..

All the best to you, hope your next round is well tolerated

My daughter insisted on
My daughter insisted on putting my picture and she downloaded herself. Thanks for the compliment but I haven't seen this smile for a long time...that's what I am hoping someday after all these, to get my life back again. I am trying to be strong for the family especially this holidays. Take care yourself.

Gabe N Abby Mom

dianehelen said:

Ya i never wear underwire
Ya i never wear underwire bras, hate em

Ok ordered the 3pk genie 4x lets see

Ask your doc about Ativan.
Ask your doc about Ativan. In addition to being an anti-anxiety drug, it helps with nausea and sleep. And you can take it as needed. It can be addictive, so you want to be careful about using it too much.

I hope your friend's recommendation works out...it sounds like your docs are not very supportive. Best wishes.

Hugs,

Linda

dianehelen

Eleanor1 said:

My daughter insisted on
My daughter insisted on putting my picture and she downloaded herself. Thanks for the compliment but I haven't seen this smile for a long time...that's what I am hoping someday after all these, to get my life back again. I am trying to be strong for the family especially this holidays. Take care yourself.

I understand about not
I understand about not seeing your smile. I used to be a very happy, bubbly, at times silly person. I feel this has just stripped the smile from my soul. What used to be tears from laughing so hard at something, has just become tears, and more tears, from this profound sadness that just is with me all the time. I too hope we both find our smiles again someday.

HUGS

kacee999

I would ask the doctor for...
an SSRI as opposed to something like Ativan. Ativan is generally a short term medication. SSRI (Selective Seratonin Reuptake Inhibitor) can be taken over long-term, and does not have the "tranquilizing" effect that Xanax, etc. have. It works on the brain and will take "the edge off". It is a daily medication that is not taken "when needed" (i.e., when you have a panic attack or an attack of anxiety or depression). I have found that SSRI's do much better at "leveling the playing field" so to speak, at least in my own experience (having used both). You don't get a bit of a "high" like the tranquilizers (benzodiazepines) from the SSRI, but it works on the seratonin of the brain...the chemical that keeps you "calm". This cancer thing is not something that is going to be over with in a month or two. It will probably take the better part of the year to complete all treatments and get back on your feet. If you are this depressed now, you sound like you need long term help. Just my two cents.

disneyfan2008

Sorry you are still in
Sorry you are still in pain. I had lumpectomy 4 yrs ago and partial masectomy 3 wks ago. (same side) I am still sore (take aleve on occassion) Though my nipple was not involved it feels like it was in a vice and then some.

Sorry about your sadness and depresssion!

Denise

I hope you can find a thearapist-I am sure you have tried your cancer center for support group or therapist...but if not GIVE them a try. Mine was great when I had misc breakdowns over work , this or that..

dianehelen

kacee999 said:

I would ask the doctor for...
an SSRI as opposed to something like Ativan. Ativan is generally a short term medication. SSRI (Selective Seratonin Reuptake Inhibitor) can be taken over long-term, and does not have the "tranquilizing" effect that Xanax, etc. have. It works on the brain and will take "the edge off". It is a daily medication that is not taken "when needed" (i.e., when you have a panic attack or an attack of anxiety or depression). I have found that SSRI's do much better at "leveling the playing field" so to speak, at least in my own experience (having used both). You don't get a bit of a "high" like the tranquilizers (benzodiazepines) from the SSRI, but it works on the seratonin of the brain...the chemical that keeps you "calm". This cancer thing is not something that is going to be over with in a month or two. It will probably take the better part of the year to complete all treatments and get back on your feet. If you are this depressed now, you sound like you need long term help. Just my two cents.

Thanks, that sounds like
Thanks, that sounds like good and useful information to discuss at my appt tomorrow

I appreciate your input

dianehelen

disneyfan2008 said:

Sorry you are still in
Sorry you are still in pain. I had lumpectomy 4 yrs ago and partial masectomy 3 wks ago. (same side) I am still sore (take aleve on occassion) Though my nipple was not involved it feels like it was in a vice and then some.

Sorry about your sadness and depresssion!

Denise

I hope you can find a thearapist-I am sure you have tried your cancer center for support group or therapist...but if not GIVE them a try. Mine was great when I had misc breakdowns over work , this or that..

Ya DF, the Damn nipple pain,
Ya DF, the Damn nipple pain, mine too, surgery no where near it but sore as hell..ughhh