One day at a time

VivianLee5689
VivianLee5689 Member Posts: 546
in Head and Neck Cancer #1
Well I am having to learn this quick. David is still in the hospital since he is having difficulty tolerating the tube feeds and using the bathroom. This morning at 6:30 the resident came in and was talking to him and said he may go home in a day or two. Then she asked if he has his neck surgery scheduled. You ought to seen his face. He is not liking any of this and I know the thought of another surgery so soon is not something he wants to do. We will do what we have to though. On another front, how do you handle day to day trials. Before I met David his house was in foreclosure. After we got married we started the home modification process using my income to supplement his. Well yesterday I came home and found a letter in the mailbox from Wells Fargo. They have rejected our loan modification and are proceeding to ask the judge on October 2 to go forward with the commissioner sale of the house. Now how in the world are we to recover from this. He is too ill to pack a 2500 sq. ft. home and I am unsure where to turn since my name isn't on the deed. Sorry to be so gloomy, but I am freaking out. My whole world has been flipped upside down and inside out.

Comments

  • Grandmax4
    Grandmax4 Member Posts: 723
    #2
    Suze Orman
    just had this problem on her show...she advised the couple to stop paying any on the mortgage, save that money, and continue to live in the house until you are put out. She says this will give you time and money to move into an apartment, etc. What an awful thing to have going on, especially right now. Thoughts are with you, peace
  • ditto1
    ditto1 Member Posts: 660
    #3
    Not sure what to offer
    when it comes to your mortgage. It amazes me that the powers to be would not rather modify a loan (I assume the interest rate) versus foreclosure, they then resale the property and likely at a much lesser price than what they would get if they just let you and your husband keep his home. Not sure how you handle a new marraige, cancer and foreclosure on your own, but I just have a feeling you will be strong enough to get it done, and I and many on this site will pray for you and your husband. Im sure we may even have a Realestate agent, or attorney on this site that may throw their thoughts in. I know On Day at a Time get old but just remember thats all we can do. Sorry if this reply did not help likely it did not, but just wanted to let you know Diane and I care.
  • Pam M
    Pam M Member Posts: 2,196
    #4
    Oh My
    Very sorry to hear you have such a stressor added to the pile. Have you tried contacting Wells Fargo and/or the judge, and explaining your situation? I would think that if they understand he's in a fight for his life at this time, and cannot empty the home, and WILL recover, and you'd be able to make modified payments that surely they'd re-visit the decision, or at the very least postpone the requested sale date. Do you have a local cancer support group? Sometimes you can find some great advice from people there, who've seen others in your situation - perhaps even attorneys who are group members who'd be willing to take a look at your issue.
  • Skiffin16
    Skiffin16 Member Posts: 8,305 Member
    #5
    Wells Fargo
    I'd try to talk to someone in person and see under the circumstances if there is anything at all they would be willing to work out with you.

    If they are completely unwilling , you might try a media approach.

    Contact one or all of your local TV cahnnels and explain your situation. Maybe they can get involved with Welss fargo, or at least get your story out.

    I see this approach used frequently here in the Tampa Bay/Orlando area, and often successfully, where the fianance agency will take another look and extend an effort to do the right thing.

    If all else fails, and you have no choice, seek support groups and agencies for help with the move.

    Is he a veteran, if so, that's another avenue to approach...local Reserve or Military Agenies.

    Anything that he might belong to, or have belonged to for support.

    JG
  • hwt
    hwt Member Posts: 2,328 Member
    #6
    Skiffin16 said:

    Wells Fargo
    I'd try to talk to someone in person and see under the circumstances if there is anything at all they would be willing to work out with you.

    If they are completely unwilling , you might try a media approach.

    Contact one or all of your local TV cahnnels and explain your situation. Maybe they can get involved with Welss fargo, or at least get your story out.

    I see this approach used frequently here in the Tampa Bay/Orlando area, and often successfully, where the fianance agency will take another look and extend an effort to do the right thing.

    If all else fails, and you have no choice, seek support groups and agencies for help with the move.

    Is he a veteran, if so, that's another avenue to approach...local Reserve or Military Agenies.

    Anything that he might belong to, or have belonged to for support.

    JG

    sorry
    you & your husband certainly don't need this added stress. Start with Wells Fargo, try to get to someone in management. If that isn't successful, John has offered some good ideas. Talk to your church if you can't get an extension of time. Maybe a teen group could gather packing materials, pack and church members could transport items to a storage facility as a temp solution. There is help out there, you just have to ask.
  • CivilMatt
    CivilMatt Member Posts: 4,724 Member
    #7
    best of luck
    Hi Vivian,

    I have to believe in this world of (short sales, foreclosures, upside downs, etc.) housing problems, your lending agency would not have a program (of some type) for sudden illness. My heart goes out to both of you.

    Best,

    Matt
  • Tim6003
    Tim6003 Member Posts: 1,514 Member
    #8
    CivilMatt said:

    best of luck
    Hi Vivian,

    I have to believe in this world of (short sales, foreclosures, upside downs, etc.) housing problems, your lending agency would not have a program (of some type) for sudden illness. My heart goes out to both of you.

    Best,

    Matt

    I kind of like Johns approach...but of course I don't know all
    the details....that last thing Wells Fargo wants is a YouTub video or articles getting out that they are kicking a man out of his houes who is very ill...much less a man who offered a loan modification ... :)

    Hope you two continue to hold up and get a break from all the side shows soon...


    Best,

    Tim
  • Hard12Find
    Hard12Find Member Posts: 218 Member
    #9
    So sorry
    So sorry to hear that. I have recently put in for a loan modification, with Wells Fargo. I am current on my mortgage, but will have a lot of unpaid time loss and am not sure how long I will be able to keep up on it. It's sad how things seem to pile during these hard times. I am having issues with my auto insurance company because I was a day late on my last payment, and they canceled the policy, willing to reinstate the policy but want all the $$$ upfront, and I don't have that cash because of all of the medical copays, prescriptions, etc. then yesterday after my wife took a bath one of the kids came upstairs and said there is water leaking in the kitchen, in my 5 year old home. I have isolated it to the tub drain or overflow, but no time, strength or energy to try and fix it right now. I was divorced about 13 years ago, and my two sons are 18 or older, so I started dating back in the spring. I had been eating better and loosing weight, so felt really good about myself. I remarried in late June, and have been helping her sort through 15 years and 8 kids worth of stuff, but just can't seem to get it done, my home is now filled with tons of combined belongings, and our marriage has been strained to the max. Wow, sorry to vent but I wanted you to know you are not alone. I am coping by keeping one thing in mind.......I have to beat this cancer or nothing else matters, and I am damned determined to do so. I believe if I can beat this disease, digging out of the financial and emotional mess, should seem easy. I dont know your religious or spiritual background, but when I remarried I have been introduced to the Latter day saints, and after years of Christianity under many different denominations, I am impressed very much by the church. These people live clean lives, and love to help those in need. I guarantee if you ask for help you will get something from them in good measure. It may be financial, or it may be physical, but I know you won't be turned away empty handed. Vivian I am pulling and praying for you and David, may you find gods calm in the middle of the storm, be strengthened, and focus on the important things. I know things look dark right now,they do at my house as well, but soon we will be through the hard part, and be picking up the pieces one at a time. I know this because we are SURVIVORS, because if you weren't you wouldn't be here. Hang in there and take it one day at a time. Remember there are only two types of problems we are ever faced with, the ones we can do something about, and the ones we can't. If there is nothing you can do about a problem, then no sense worrying, let it run it's course, and if it is one you can do something about, stop worrying and get to doing. I am sure my sons got tired of hearing that bit of wisdom growing up, but I know at some time in their life it will help them. I hope it helps you now.
    Jim
  • Barbara B
    Barbara B Member Posts: 40
    #10
    Hard12Find said:

    So sorry
    So sorry to hear that. I have recently put in for a loan modification, with Wells Fargo. I am current on my mortgage, but will have a lot of unpaid time loss and am not sure how long I will be able to keep up on it. It's sad how things seem to pile during these hard times. I am having issues with my auto insurance company because I was a day late on my last payment, and they canceled the policy, willing to reinstate the policy but want all the $$$ upfront, and I don't have that cash because of all of the medical copays, prescriptions, etc. then yesterday after my wife took a bath one of the kids came upstairs and said there is water leaking in the kitchen, in my 5 year old home. I have isolated it to the tub drain or overflow, but no time, strength or energy to try and fix it right now. I was divorced about 13 years ago, and my two sons are 18 or older, so I started dating back in the spring. I had been eating better and loosing weight, so felt really good about myself. I remarried in late June, and have been helping her sort through 15 years and 8 kids worth of stuff, but just can't seem to get it done, my home is now filled with tons of combined belongings, and our marriage has been strained to the max. Wow, sorry to vent but I wanted you to know you are not alone. I am coping by keeping one thing in mind.......I have to beat this cancer or nothing else matters, and I am damned determined to do so. I believe if I can beat this disease, digging out of the financial and emotional mess, should seem easy. I dont know your religious or spiritual background, but when I remarried I have been introduced to the Latter day saints, and after years of Christianity under many different denominations, I am impressed very much by the church. These people live clean lives, and love to help those in need. I guarantee if you ask for help you will get something from them in good measure. It may be financial, or it may be physical, but I know you won't be turned away empty handed. Vivian I am pulling and praying for you and David, may you find gods calm in the middle of the storm, be strengthened, and focus on the important things. I know things look dark right now,they do at my house as well, but soon we will be through the hard part, and be picking up the pieces one at a time. I know this because we are SURVIVORS, because if you weren't you wouldn't be here. Hang in there and take it one day at a time. Remember there are only two types of problems we are ever faced with, the ones we can do something about, and the ones we can't. If there is nothing you can do about a problem, then no sense worrying, let it run it's course, and if it is one you can do something about, stop worrying and get to doing. I am sure my sons got tired of hearing that bit of wisdom growing up, but I know at some time in their life it will help them. I hope it helps you now.
    Jim

    Foreclosure Project
    Friends of ours contacted a group in Florida called "The foreclosure project". Somehow through court filings they are able to help people stay in their homes for up to two years. They advise clients not to make mortgage payments, and in the meantime they attempt to re-negotiate the loan. In the meantime our friends are saving as much money as they can just in case they have to move out. That is about all I know.

    It seems to me that you have extenuating circumstances and that Wells Fargo should consider your good track record.

    I don't know where you are, but maybe there is an attorney close by that can help.

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