Mediport Insertion

joane0328

Had my mediport inserted on Friday 8/31 and had much more pain than I ever anticipated.

My pain level was a 9 by the time I got home at 10:15 and ended up rotating t#3;s ( 2 tabs), oxycodone ( 1 tab) and naproxen every 60-90 minutes from 10:30- 7:00 PM, with pain rating starting at 9 and gradually going to 3.

Finally realized that a big cause of the pain was how the site was dressed post op.

They had taken a 4x4 and folded in in 4ths, and placed a tegaderm over it. The small dressing, (about a quarter in size) was pressing against the new incision and causing pain. Once I removed the dressing the relief was apparent

I essentially had a day full of pain that could have been avoided if the dressing had been applied differently.

Today, there was some mild discomfort from movement and/ or using it when shopping, but the difference from yesterday to today was night and day.

I ran into 2 old classmates, and broke the news to them. Am not to the point yet where I don't cry when relaying my news.

Am hoping that this will change soon, as I have finally decided that I have to let people know ( not all but those that have been a good part of my life to date).

I have known my diagnosis for over 2 months,but still feeling very awkward, uncomfortable disclosing it to others.

As far as the pain from the procedure, I feel like a baby feeling so much pain, and scared that I will never be able to deal with all the radiation effects.

I am a true basket case and am so scared, I always felt that I was a strong person who could deal with adversity.

Obviously, when reality hits, things change.

Just needing to vent, not sure what people can say that will make me feel better.

I am very thankful for this site however, as I see that I am not alone.

MyHopen413

You are not a baby at all.
You are not a baby at all. Everyone is scared when they first find out they have cancer. I'm so sorry you are having to go through this.
I always considered myself to be strong also. I had to learn to depend on other people and allow them to help me. Sometimes I had to pray myself through the next minute. I am less than 6 months out of a year of treatment and back and work full time and cancer free. What I went through was very hard, but I am grateful that I am on the road to recovery.
You will be OK. You will make it. I hope you have family or friends that can support you. If not, find a support group, talk to your nurses, let us know how you are feeling.
I'll think of you and pray for you.

You are not alone.
Diane

mp327

Hi Joanne
I'm sorry you had that first day of terrible pain after your port was inserted, but glad you are doing better with it now. You will be glad to have that port when you begin treatment, as the chemo drugs can be very damaging to veins.

As for telling people about your cancer, I would only tell people that you know who will lift you up and not put you down. If you think someone will judge you or use your situation as fodder for jokes or crass remarks, then I would not tell them. People who really care about you will support you through this. My situation showed me who my real friends were.

You have every right to be frightened, no matter how strong you always thought you were. Cancer is scary and treatment is scary. However, I do think you'll feel some of that lift once you begin treatment, as you'll finally be doing something to fight back. That was my experience. There were 6 long and terribly scary weeks between the time I was diagnosed and the day I started treatment. Once I got that first chemo session and radiation treatment, I felt like a Warrior who could beat this disease. Allow yourself to cry, scream, vent or whatever makes you feel better. The emotional side of this disease can take its toll, so don't hold in your feelings.

I wish you all the best with your treatment and hope you'll let us follow your journey by posting updates as you are able. We will be here for you.

eihtak

Scared...
Go ahead and feel weak and scared, it means you are human. We all felt and still feel that way at times. Some amazing things happen once you begin treatment though, you will one day feel almost super-human! You will find an inner strength you did not know before and will get through this as all of us have. Unfortunately you must climb that mountain before sliding down the hill! In the beginning I only discussed my diagnosis with certain people, even some family took time to understand. Too many people are uneducated (ourselves included at first) and just don't know what to think or say. Because of the word "anus" their minds instantly go to all kinds of crazy places. Some people you tell will suddenly become afraid that if it happened to you it could happen to them too, so prefer to just avoid the topic (and maybe you). You know the whole, out of sight out of mind thing! I have a close friend who was/is kind of like that, but in my heart she is still my friend. She doesn't call much and I don't see her ever lately, but she is in my prayers everyday and I know we will be friends again like we were sometime. I focus now on getting info out there and educating people on anal cancer along with other HPV associated cancers so that the topic does not instill such fear that it doesn't get the attention it deserves. You will be in my thoughts and prayers for strength both in mind and body. (watch those dressings, sometimes the simplest things make a difference)

mxperry220

Do Not Be Ashamed
I am 3 years 8 months post treatment. I have no problem telling anyone that I have had anal cancer. My position is they can assume anything they want. They are not paying my bills. I do not know or care what they say behind my back. When I tell them I have not gotten any negative vibs from them. This is cancer that I think we will be seeing more cases in the future. I only hope they go home and "Google" anal cancer to educate themselves on this horrible cancer.
Mike

Angela_K

mxperry220 said:

Do Not Be Ashamed
I am 3 years 8 months post treatment. I have no problem telling anyone that I have had anal cancer. My position is they can assume anything they want. They are not paying my bills. I do not know or care what they say behind my back. When I tell them I have not gotten any negative vibs from them. This is cancer that I think we will be seeing more cases in the future. I only hope they go home and "Google" anal cancer to educate themselves on this horrible cancer.
Mike

mxperry220
I agree. I see it as my duty to speak openly and candidly about this cancer in order to promote prevention and early detection of ANY cancer. I have been told once and now for a second time recently, that my blog has encouraged early detection. One for vulva cancer, one for colon cancer. Both were in the very early stages, treated with surgery with no radiation or chemo needed. And I know that my constant talk about eating healthier has encouraged many of my friends/family and friends of friends to make healthy lifestyle changes which boosts their strongest immune system possible by eliminating all processed foods (including wheat and of course, sugar) from their diets and adding a lot of fresh, organic vegetables and fresh berries as staples. By no means am I patting myself on the back. Just giving an example of how we, as survivors, can transform lives. For me, I wasn't diagnosed and made to go through that brutal treatment just to keep quiet and not actively reach out to others. But that's just me.