THE IRONY OF TIMING?

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tuffenuff
tuffenuff Member Posts: 277
for the last 12 years i was a top performer and very sought after in my company. then pretty suddenly everything changed and i just started to hate everything about what i was doing. i couldn't figure out why. my blood pressure was up and my spirits were down. so i went on medical leave for 6 months.

i ended up resigning and 2 weeks later was when this thing on my neck popped up. 2 weeks after that, i received my diagnosis. i was pissed at first. why now??? my life is perfect so how can this be happening???

i've been thinking about that a lot. i've decided that just maybe if i had been diagnosed when i was so frantic and unhappy with work, and myself in general, that i may not have been as well equipped to deal with all of this.

i'm hoping and praying that this change in my life works with my body and the universe to overcome this cancer. because i gotta say... i am not finished here yet. hell, i'm just getting started good!

Comments

  • Skiffin16
    Skiffin16 Member Posts: 8,305 Member
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    Well Said...
    Sorry you are here, many have similar stories...who ever knows why you were chosen for the path you are now on.

    I can only feel that you will overcome this, and it will make you a better person.

    Thoughts and Prayers,
    John
  • phrannie51
    phrannie51 Member Posts: 4,716
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    The same thing was happening to me......
    at least in the work front. I was generally unhappy, and dragging myself to work everyday starting last September, pushing myself to do everything really ...Thought maybe I was simply depressed in a general way, but could not put a finger on what or why. By November I KNEW something was physically wrong with me, but still no obvious sign...it could be anything, but my gut told me it wasn't a passing thing.

    The node on my neck started in late December...and tho the Dr.'s were sure it was due to a sinus infection...and did all the antibiotic stuff, and drug out sending me to an ENT until March...I knew it was something serious (tho my heart wanted to believe in what the Drs. were saying)...

    I'm hoping that when I go back to work the enthusiasm will return with the cancer gone...that it was what was dragging me down, and making everthing a pain in the butt...on the other hand, my perspective has changed :).....different things have priority...I might just get back and find out that it's time to retire and do some bucket list things.

    p
  • osmotar
    osmotar Member Posts: 1,006
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    Dealings
    HI tuff,

    I was and still to a small extent a Type A personality, if I wasn't doing it, it wasn't getting done right, early in the office work, work , work..all it was getting me was frustrated...the along comes this bus ride with cancer, and while some may balk at what I'm going to say next, maybe it was the universes way of telling me to slow down, appreciate what I have, love those that I love even more than what I thought was possible, and to realize all the wonderful people in my life..and the best of all that it's just a job, things that don't get done today well guess what there is always tomorrow. So who knows why , in fact I don't even care anymore about the why or how I got cancer,I know that today I am so far cancer free after as what my onco doc said was the mother of all treatments , that I'm stoppiong to smell the roses, that I have have a lot of living yet to do...as you said hell I'm just getting started!!!

    Linda
  • Skiffin16
    Skiffin16 Member Posts: 8,305 Member
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    osmotar said:

    Dealings
    HI tuff,

    I was and still to a small extent a Type A personality, if I wasn't doing it, it wasn't getting done right, early in the office work, work , work..all it was getting me was frustrated...the along comes this bus ride with cancer, and while some may balk at what I'm going to say next, maybe it was the universes way of telling me to slow down, appreciate what I have, love those that I love even more than what I thought was possible, and to realize all the wonderful people in my life..and the best of all that it's just a job, things that don't get done today well guess what there is always tomorrow. So who knows why , in fact I don't even care anymore about the why or how I got cancer,I know that today I am so far cancer free after as what my onco doc said was the mother of all treatments , that I'm stoppiong to smell the roses, that I have have a lot of living yet to do...as you said hell I'm just getting started!!!

    Linda

    And You Know That...
    Another Ahhh Haaa moment.....

    Things that use to be BIG, well they aren't so big any longer...

    It's the little things that are big now, the little things that are really important.

    Best,
    John
  • CivilMatt
    CivilMatt Member Posts: 4,723 Member
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    Who Knows?
    Hi tuffenuff,

    So sorry you’ve joined the ever growing club. I had no clue I was sick and to be truthful I don’t know if it would have helped to identify a reason. I wasn’t miserable or stuck in a stressful job, if anything, life was easy and good.

    Hopefully, from here forward you’ll gain clarity which many on this site seem to have (and are willing to share).

    Best of wishes and prayers,

    Matt
  • hawk711
    hawk711 Member Posts: 566
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    CivilMatt said:

    Who Knows?
    Hi tuffenuff,

    So sorry you’ve joined the ever growing club. I had no clue I was sick and to be truthful I don’t know if it would have helped to identify a reason. I wasn’t miserable or stuck in a stressful job, if anything, life was easy and good.

    Hopefully, from here forward you’ll gain clarity which many on this site seem to have (and are willing to share).

    Best of wishes and prayers,

    Matt

    When life gives you lemons.....
    I had just gotten over a major surgery as I have a family history of colon cancer. So I took care of it up front. Smart guy. Then out of no where, bump on tongue, bumps in neck, the Big C. I was in shock and just hit the ground running to get through. After the treatment, I was just glad to be here, or anywhere for that matter. I changed jobs and started taking deep breaths and appreciate the birds singing in the morning and the sunsets.
    I told my wife that I just want everyone I know to be happy, because all else is just bull.....
    Happy to be here with a new attitude and enjoying every day...maybe the big C did open my eyes and brain to really knowing what to care about.....God could have just tapped me on the shoulder, I swear I'd have listened, just saying....
    lol,
    Steve
  • tuffenuff
    tuffenuff Member Posts: 277
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    hawk711 said:

    When life gives you lemons.....
    I had just gotten over a major surgery as I have a family history of colon cancer. So I took care of it up front. Smart guy. Then out of no where, bump on tongue, bumps in neck, the Big C. I was in shock and just hit the ground running to get through. After the treatment, I was just glad to be here, or anywhere for that matter. I changed jobs and started taking deep breaths and appreciate the birds singing in the morning and the sunsets.
    I told my wife that I just want everyone I know to be happy, because all else is just bull.....
    Happy to be here with a new attitude and enjoying every day...maybe the big C did open my eyes and brain to really knowing what to care about.....God could have just tapped me on the shoulder, I swear I'd have listened, just saying....
    lol,
    Steve

    A tap on the shoulder...
    A tap on the shoulder... Yeah that would've worked. I guess the good thing is aside from this speed bump, I feel better and am happier than I've ever been. I will take 40 or 50 more years please :o)