Listen

Rague · April 2012

When I ask you to listen to me and you start giving advice you have not done what I asked.

When I ask you to listen to me and you begin to tell me why I shouldn't feel that way, you are trampling on my feelings.

When I ask you to listen to me and you feel you have to do something to solve my problem, you have failed me, as strange as that may seem.

Listen! All I asked was listen, not talk or do - just hear me.

Advice is cheap: 10 cents will get you both Dear Abby and Billy Graham in the same paper. And I can do for myself; I'm not helpless. Maybe I'm discouraged and faltering, but not helpless.

When you do something for me that I can and need to do for myself, you contribute to my fear and weakness.

But when you accept as a simple fact that I do feel what I feel, no matter how irrational, then I can quit trying to convince you and can get about the business of understanding what's behind this irrational feeling. And when that's clear, the answer is obvious and I don't need advice.

Irrational feelings make sense when we understand what's behind them.

Perhaps that's why prayer works, sometimes, for some people because God is mute and doesn't give advice or try to fix things. "They" listen and let you work it out for yourself.

So please listen and just hear me. And if you want to talk, wait a minute for you turn: and I'll listen to you.

Anonymous

I was just going through some stuff looking for something else but ran across this handout from the last Retreat I went to. Thought it was worth passing on. It's obviously dated as it says 10 cent papers but the intent is there and timeless.

Winyan - The Power Within

Susan