thanks again every one for the thoughts and prayers!

Been at the hospitol all day, husbands brother and sister-in-law were there when I came home, so was his daughter. I had a very hard day! Husbands cancer doctor said there is nothing more to do nothing else can be done. He has blood clots in both of his veins on each side of his neck. And he face is all swollen up. They did try blood thinners yesterday, but stopped them because he started throwing up. His doctor said maybe we should try Hospice? Don't know anything about Hospice, didn't even want to hear that word because I felt that there was nothing more to do to help him. I am so very sad, can hardly type, without making a thousand mistakes, don't know what to do? He cannot talk I bought him a board to right on, but he still doesn't write anything. They have him on pain patch. I'm scared. The lady did come in his room today to discuss Hospice she seemed really nice, but Hospice? Oh my, I feel like there is no hope. Has anybody on this site heard of those 2 veins clogging up? He started throwing up last Wed, was suppose to have cemo treatment but his white blood count was to high she said to take him to er so that is when everything started, was dehydrated and then everything went down heal that fast? Has anybody out ever heard of anyone that has their face swell up and the 2 veins on their neck get clogged up in just 2 days? That fast?? I NEVER! So please if anybody out there has ever heard of this happening to someone please let me know. Help please. I just don't know what to do. I know we all have to go some day but we are really never ready! I scared and i know my husband must be really scared and there is nothing I can do but say I LOVE YOU and hold his hand. I feel so helpless. Everyone says he is looking better, maybe to them he is, anymore there has been more bad days then good ones for him. I have had to bury both my mom and dad never my child and maybe I won't have to bury my husband maybe there is mericials can't spell anymore. I just know the people of this site know better then anybody the feeling that I am feeling is the only reason I can kinda talk and know you all understand. My sister said this morning Sue, just don't know how you are doing it all? I said Beth, you just got to do what you have to do. She said well,,, I know Bill wouldn't have taken me to my treatments if it where me he would have said sorry you are on your own . Never never could think that way I couldn't live with myself. My gosh me and my husband been together for 30 years must of them good, but some bad just like everything else in this life, we held on and I guess that is what it is all about in the end just hold on tight. Thanks for listnigh i cant spell so sorry 'God bless each and every one of you on the site! I have been on here for 1 year today. Last Nov he found out he had supragottic cancer form smoking not drinking but smoking does not smoke now but his 2 kids do. They have to watch his Dad not eat or drink his favorite cup of coffee or eat fried potatoes with onios that he loved and talking to friends and family on the phone nothing, but so said that they can'tgive up the smokes, not saying they will get this type of cancer but quit if you can the more good you do for you body the more good your body will do thinks for you
SUE

Comments

  • sweetblood22
    sweetblood22 Member Posts: 3,228
    I'm sorry, Sue.
    Sue, I wish I had some thing to say or do for you. All I can offer are more prayers. Will send you a PM.
  • KTeacher
    KTeacher Member Posts: 1,103
    Like Sweet
    All I can offer is prayer, I don't know how anyone gets through this without it. Maybe you can ask family to help with visits so you can get rest. You might want to keep a notebook handy so anyone that is visiting can take notes if a doctor or nurse comes into the room, and they can let you know how your husband was doing while you were not there.
    I also have Type 2 diabetes, our blood sugars go wacky when our body is under stress. It is good for you to have a record of the blood draws at the hospital, sometimes when our sugars are high we do not do or say things that we mean too. Sometimes when our numbers are high, someone else needs to make some decisions for us (food or getting meds).
  • KTeacher
    KTeacher Member Posts: 1,103
    KTeacher said:

    Like Sweet
    All I can offer is prayer, I don't know how anyone gets through this without it. Maybe you can ask family to help with visits so you can get rest. You might want to keep a notebook handy so anyone that is visiting can take notes if a doctor or nurse comes into the room, and they can let you know how your husband was doing while you were not there.
    I also have Type 2 diabetes, our blood sugars go wacky when our body is under stress. It is good for you to have a record of the blood draws at the hospital, sometimes when our sugars are high we do not do or say things that we mean too. Sometimes when our numbers are high, someone else needs to make some decisions for us (food or getting meds).

    Sorry Sue
    I thought that I read in one of your posts that he was also diabetic. Sorry to add to your stress. I had better go to be now.
  • Pam M
    Pam M Member Posts: 2,196
    Hoping for a Break
    Sue,
    How scary and stressful for you. You may want to take his picture in the hospital. This way, if people tell you he looks better, you can compare the way he looks one day to the way he looks another day.

    Sorry, too that his kids won't quit smoking - I know that seeing them smoke must be rough on you. I live with my father; he still smokes after having a brother die from lung cancer, watching my mother sicken and die from COPD and seeing me go through cancer treatment.

    I don't know anyone who had only their face swell - wish I had some useful info for you.
  • sue5749
    sue5749 Member Posts: 170
    Pam M said:

    Hoping for a Break
    Sue,
    How scary and stressful for you. You may want to take his picture in the hospital. This way, if people tell you he looks better, you can compare the way he looks one day to the way he looks another day.

    Sorry, too that his kids won't quit smoking - I know that seeing them smoke must be rough on you. I live with my father; he still smokes after having a brother die from lung cancer, watching my mother sicken and die from COPD and seeing me go through cancer treatment.

    I don't know anyone who had only their face swell - wish I had some useful info for you.

    thanks agian
    been reading any the responds this morning and thanks so much! I really never thought of taking a picture, going to put mine on charge right now
    tnow! Yes, I had never heard of the swelling of the neck area either? the dockers say that the tumor is so large that is maybe i think he said pushing against those two veins causing blood clots to form, with his condition it is to risky for surgery. Might die from it. So I am thinking just to bring him on home. He wants the anyway he said to me. HE WANTS TO GO HOME. This has been a year from hell thats for sure/ Nothing but doctor, blood draws,. cd scans X-rays, pet scans, hospitol er visits, rad treatments, cemo treatments, Over and over again, and all through that I think we were lucky enough to fit in a couple of theater visits. So going for now husband been sleeping as well as can be resting in the hospitol having a little trouble with his breathing but giving his some oxygen. Guess there is nothing more the medical people can do, only God. I we will see what God wants for him. All I know is I want him with me, guess it's not up to me, I guess we are all just human. We don't think about all the things that might happen, just think life is going to go on for ever. Bought a home in FL, we thought, hey, we can get away from the cold, cold, winter months, nothing is going to change. But they do, If I could go back and I know we should never thank "what if" but I would have had 1 house and just think how thankful I am. But I just wonder if we do? Do we all think how so thankful we really are? My sister suffers from depression, my other to sisters seems to be pretty happy. My one sister is a RN and all her children seem to be doing great. But I think, from my one sisters she puts God first, I think that is the secret Maybe it's really isn't a secret, maybe a lot of people already know that> That is why so many people live seemly happly lives, not saying they don't have their troubles, on this earth every person has some form of trouble, but I think maybe don't know for sure, but if maybe you but God first He will help you through these troubling times that we all as humans have to face one day. Anyway just wanted to write my thoughts down.
  • Skiffin16
    Skiffin16 Member Posts: 8,305 Member
    So Very Sorry As Well...
    Definitely not the news anyone wants to hear....

    I also, can offer nothing other than my thoughts and prayers.

    But also, I can offer to never give up hope, the positive power of faith, family and friends is awesome.

    Prayers,
    John
  • jim and i
    jim and i Member Posts: 1,788 Member
    prayers and miricles
    Sue,

    My heart breaks for you. My husband had his jaw swell to the size of a golf ball in two days. It was from a clogged gland that got infected. 5 days in the hospital on iv antibiptic fixed it.

    As for miricles, My mother was hospitalized for pancrititis, went home, back again for blood infection, congestive heart failure and a 7 cm cyst on her pancreas. Got to the point where doctors had us filling out medical power of attorney and DNR. They told us to have everyone we could pray. We had prayers going out everywhere. I served her Holy Communion with my sisters present (I am a pastor) and prayed with everything I could. Two days later turn atound, two days after that, home. One month later she is back to bingo and living life as usual although a little tireder and lighter. She is 80 and one tough Fos centered woman now. She fully believes that God saved her.

    Believe in miricles. Go to God and cry out your needs, then place the control and your husband in God's hands. None of us can predict who will get a miricle, but I can tell you that we are all healed in the end because we all die eventually and when that happens, we suffer no more and are made whole again.

    Praying for a miricle and for your comfort.

    Debbie
  • Greend
    Greend Member Posts: 678
    jim and i said:

    prayers and miricles
    Sue,

    My heart breaks for you. My husband had his jaw swell to the size of a golf ball in two days. It was from a clogged gland that got infected. 5 days in the hospital on iv antibiptic fixed it.

    As for miricles, My mother was hospitalized for pancrititis, went home, back again for blood infection, congestive heart failure and a 7 cm cyst on her pancreas. Got to the point where doctors had us filling out medical power of attorney and DNR. They told us to have everyone we could pray. We had prayers going out everywhere. I served her Holy Communion with my sisters present (I am a pastor) and prayed with everything I could. Two days later turn atound, two days after that, home. One month later she is back to bingo and living life as usual although a little tireder and lighter. She is 80 and one tough Fos centered woman now. She fully believes that God saved her.

    Believe in miricles. Go to God and cry out your needs, then place the control and your husband in God's hands. None of us can predict who will get a miricle, but I can tell you that we are all healed in the end because we all die eventually and when that happens, we suffer no more and are made whole again.

    Praying for a miricle and for your comfort.

    Debbie

    It is tough
    I recently went through this with my mother-in-law and I have to say that in my opinion Hospice is a miracle. People hate to face the end but it must be done. I was able to talk with her when her children couldn't and it seemed such a relief to her to be able to talk to someone and express her desires and concerns. She was actually more worried about her kids than she was herself. She was able to pass away at home with family by her side and her cat in the bed and that is what she wanted. Thanks to Hospice there was no pain while she was here.

    My prayers are with you.

    Denny