Only Child Asks About Single Mother with UPSC

LovingSon

Dear All,

I see all the love and encouragement and thought I would take this first step in giving and receiving.

I wanted some of your perspective on two things:

1. I am an only child with a single mother. I am in my 30's, she in her 60's. No siblings and my father passed when I was 15. I have no wife, girlfriend or kids. As you can imagine, my mom is my best friend and I am hers. She is my rock. I am her rock. Our love for each other cannot be described by words. I have no one except her, and now I feel is God is trying to take her?, but I am trying my best to keep her. How do I cope? I can't lose the only person in my family, in my life, in my world. I have nothing else and I want her to be alive and healthy enough to see the wedding and grandchildren she has always waited for.

2. Last month she had abdominal pain. But no bleeding. The docs thought it was a UTI, gave antibiotics, but no effect. She had an ultrasound - nothing abnormal except slightly thickened endometrial lining. The pain kept on, so her gyn did a biopsy. It came back for UPSC. We were all shocked. Also did a CT - nothing showed up. Did a CA-125 - markers looked normal, or at least low enough to not raise flags. Did a DNC - sent to pathology and confirmed it was UPSC. Ironically, her original abdominal pain went away, so we feel it wasn’t ever related to the cancer - just some form of luck that prompted her to investigate further. So, a few weeks later she did a total Davincci assisted Hysterectomy by a gynonc. At the hospital, they did another CT before the operation where that showed some small "nodules" in the pelvic wall area. Then they did the surgery and we waited for pathology and staging. Based on all the facts - asymptomatic, no bleeding, low CA-125, hard to see anything on imaging, etc - we felt this was super early UPSC.

The results came back and I was shocked that it came with a FIGO staging score of 4B. The cancer was present in microscopic amounts on the omentum, two nodules on the left and right side of the pelvic wall, and of course in the uterus. No cancer found in the ovaries, fallopian tubes, or in any of the 7 lymph nodes resected.

How can this be stage 4?

Am I in denial, or is it possible for it to be called stage 4 since it metastasized in microscopic amounts outside uterus to some nearby tissues?

Is there any silver lining I can extract from this?

She starts next week 6 rounds of IV Chemo (Carbo/Taxol combo). 3 cycles of chemo 3 weeks apart, 25 daily sessions of external pelvic radiation, and then 3 last cycles of chemo three weeks apart.

Any answers, similar encouraging stories or just plain love would be so much appreciated....

Love and best wishes to all....

norma2

It is going to be ok.
Dear LovingSon,

Your mother and I are roughly the same age. I was diagnosed IIIC FIGO 2, two years ago. Had treatment very similar to what you describe for your Mom. Glad to tell you that I am alive and well. If your Mom's overall healthy is good there is every posibility she will be here for years to come. As you can read on this site there are many ladies here that are doing great.

When I was first diagnosed I was more concerned about my kids, especially my son. He and I are close like you describe about your Mom. The news of my cancer diagnosis really upset him for a long time. As the treatment went on and he could see that I was not going to die right then and there, he began to be able to cope. I have always been healthy and it was unreal for him that I might have a life threatening illness. Now that I survived the surgery, chemo, (son's comment on the baldness was that I was pretty and it helped, only the eyes of a loving son would have seen me pretty at that stage), and radiation, he is doing much better. And you will to, honey. It is a lot to take in right now. Being there for your Mom will help her so much. Unfortunately, illness is a part of life. What helped me was to keep a sense of humor and faith that everything was going to work out.
And it did. I will be praying the same for you and your Mom.


There is hope. Norma

carolenk

norma2 said:

It is going to be ok.
Dear LovingSon,

Your mother and I are roughly the same age. I was diagnosed IIIC FIGO 2, two years ago. Had treatment very similar to what you describe for your Mom. Glad to tell you that I am alive and well. If your Mom's overall healthy is good there is every posibility she will be here for years to come. As you can read on this site there are many ladies here that are doing great.

When I was first diagnosed I was more concerned about my kids, especially my son. He and I are close like you describe about your Mom. The news of my cancer diagnosis really upset him for a long time. As the treatment went on and he could see that I was not going to die right then and there, he began to be able to cope. I have always been healthy and it was unreal for him that I might have a life threatening illness. Now that I survived the surgery, chemo, (son's comment on the baldness was that I was pretty and it helped, only the eyes of a loving son would have seen me pretty at that stage), and radiation, he is doing much better. And you will to, honey. It is a lot to take in right now. Being there for your Mom will help her so much. Unfortunately, illness is a part of life. What helped me was to keep a sense of humor and faith that everything was going to work out.
And it did. I will be praying the same for you and your Mom.


There is hope. Norma

She's got a good chance of going into remission
Try not to get hung up on whether your sweet mom is stage III or stage IV. From the info you provided, it could be either--and the treatment will be the same regardless. A lot of research has gone into finding the best treatment & new medicines are on the horizon.

Social support for the cancer survivor has been shown to increase their chances of "outliving their prognosis." Does your mom live with you or alone?
I was never left alone for the six weeks that followed my surgery & it helped me tremendously. See if you can arrange to take FMLA leave from work or find someone to go with your mom to therapy (if she agrees with this) and make sure she has healthy meals to eat.

After the shock wears off, you'll see there are a LOT of cancer survivors out there! You're mom could be one of them.

lindaprocopio

carolenk said:

She's got a good chance of going into remission
Try not to get hung up on whether your sweet mom is stage III or stage IV. From the info you provided, it could be either--and the treatment will be the same regardless. A lot of research has gone into finding the best treatment & new medicines are on the horizon.

Social support for the cancer survivor has been shown to increase their chances of "outliving their prognosis." Does your mom live with you or alone?
I was never left alone for the six weeks that followed my surgery & it helped me tremendously. See if you can arrange to take FMLA leave from work or find someone to go with your mom to therapy (if she agrees with this) and make sure she has healthy meals to eat.

After the shock wears off, you'll see there are a LOT of cancer survivors out there! You're mom could be one of them.

Thanks for 'friend-ing' me; and for being there for your mom.
I have 2 sweet sons of my own, and see reflected in their eyes the same type of worry and shock that I read in your post. I was just like your mom, incredibly healthy and no symptoms, and we got our first hint that I may have cancer during my annual physical check-up, with some funky looking cells that looked suspicious showing up pn my Pap Test. We were also sure I'd caught it super early, and yet my diagnosis was Stage 3-c. But, sweet boy, that was over 3 years ago!! I'm still here! So please don't despair. Papillary serous is a nasty aggressive cancer, but MANY women go into remission after their initial chemo and radiation, a remission that lasts for years and years.

Because you 'friend'-ed me, can I assume that you have been reading some of the older posts? I think it would help prepare you and comfort you if you scrolled back to the OLDEST page archived on this Board, to the oldest post from 2008. It loads very slowly because it is such a crazy long thread, but it reads like a book written especially for someone newly diagnosed with UPSC. I hope that you do that and that it helps you.

As questions occur to you, please post again. We'd be happy to help you any way we can by sharing our own experiences and by running your questions by our oncologists. (((hugs)))

cleo

lindaprocopio said:

Thanks for 'friend-ing' me; and for being there for your mom.
I have 2 sweet sons of my own, and see reflected in their eyes the same type of worry and shock that I read in your post. I was just like your mom, incredibly healthy and no symptoms, and we got our first hint that I may have cancer during my annual physical check-up, with some funky looking cells that looked suspicious showing up pn my Pap Test. We were also sure I'd caught it super early, and yet my diagnosis was Stage 3-c. But, sweet boy, that was over 3 years ago!! I'm still here! So please don't despair. Papillary serous is a nasty aggressive cancer, but MANY women go into remission after their initial chemo and radiation, a remission that lasts for years and years.

Because you 'friend'-ed me, can I assume that you have been reading some of the older posts? I think it would help prepare you and comfort you if you scrolled back to the OLDEST page archived on this Board, to the oldest post from 2008. It loads very slowly because it is such a crazy long thread, but it reads like a book written especially for someone newly diagnosed with UPSC. I hope that you do that and that it helps you.

As questions occur to you, please post again. We'd be happy to help you any way we can by sharing our own experiences and by running your questions by our oncologists. (((hugs)))

Your mum
Sept 2007 I was approx your mum's age and my son your age. At that stage he had no partner and we have no relatives. I think that your mum will be more worried about you than herself. My son was a rock...matter of fact and there for me without being over protective [I manage better without over-concern] I too was 100% healthy with no symptoms, diagnosed stage 3/4 as my bladder and lymph nodes were involved. I am fit and well and have no intention of being anything else as I am still awaiting the grandchildren!! Have a positive attitude and stay strong as I am sure that is half the battle. I also received a wonderful letter from my son's great friends telling me not to worry as he was part of their families and would always be supported.

sleem

Some possible help:
The first two links are articles to understand more about UPSC & CA-125.

C:\UPSC\Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) about the CA-125 Test good.mht

http://www2.mdanderson.org/depts/oncolog/pdfs-issues/10/oncolog4-5-10.pdf

See (pp.4-6) in the article. Even though it is for early stages, it has a good background of UPSC and the treatments that are being considered for women in general. This is the treatment that I had at MDA.


The two links below are to support you in your support of you mom.

http://www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/coping/caring-for-the-caregiver.pdf

http://media.cancercare.org/publications/original/1-ccc_caregiver.pdf

I have found these articles are helpful in understanding stages in UPSC.

I have two sons. Your Mom has you at her side. Continue to support her and to know she has you in her life and that is so wonderful.
I am surviving with UPSC.
Bless you both.