What is up with all the old threads???

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Hissy_Fitz
Hissy_Fitz Member Posts: 1,834
in Ovarian Cancer #1
Dear CSN members...

If you are tempted to respond to some ancient thread that you found while searching the site, please take a minute to make sure you aren't resurrecting photos and comments from members who have passed away. It's very painful for some of us, and very creepy, as well, to log on and see what appears to be a post from beyond the grave.

I only mention this because there seems to be a LOT of these that have surfaced lately.

Thanks,
Carlene

Comments

  • froggy1
    froggy1 Member Posts: 205
    #2
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    Old threads
    I think CSN should make some threads "read only." It is done on other boards after a certain date. They become archival posts.
    I buried my Mother last week and am fighting for my life with a recurrence(radiation now and chemo)but intend to write to CSN when I get a chance.
    It pains me so to see old faces that have passed on. I have been on this board for quite a while and have a hard time seeing all their old posts, some which were so hopeful.
    I will be carefully checking the post dates, as I don't want to read some of these comments unless I choose to, not by accident.
    The worst will be when a unsuspecting new member responds to a person who has passed on.
    It may have already happened.
    Be well all, Ginny
  • carolenk
    carolenk Member Posts: 907 Member
    #3
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    It's kind of like reading
    It's kind of like reading the Diary of Anne Frank in some ways. I meet some incredible people on this discussion board & appreciate their continued presence--or legacy. Although it pains me, too, to see the names/faces of the departed ones, I feel it's OK when they are resurrected so to speak.

    I have some FaceBook friends who have passed on & it's kind of weird yet comforting to think they are out there in cyberspace.

    Carolen
  • Mwee
    Mwee Member Posts: 1,338
    #4
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    Ditto, Carlene
    It literally takes my breath away when I accidently read old posts and see pics of beloved teal sisters that are no longer with us.
    (((HUGS))) Maria
  • MK_4Dani
    MK_4Dani Member Posts: 314
    #5
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    Thank you for posting this....
    my heart dropped, hair raising chills and thought I was losing my mind!
    OY!
    Mary
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #6
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    MK_4Dani said:

    Thank you for posting this....
    my heart dropped, hair raising chills and thought I was losing my mind!
    OY!
    Mary

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • pstur1
    pstur1 Member Posts: 37
    #7
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    carolenk said:

    It's kind of like reading
    It's kind of like reading the Diary of Anne Frank in some ways. I meet some incredible people on this discussion board & appreciate their continued presence--or legacy. Although it pains me, too, to see the names/faces of the departed ones, I feel it's OK when they are resurrected so to speak.

    I have some FaceBook friends who have passed on & it's kind of weird yet comforting to think they are out there in cyberspace.

    Carolen

    I was going to bite my tongue but
    I surely appreciate your angst at reading old post from perhaps dearly departed friends and family, I get it truly. However, don't you think it is a little harsh to dictate who we can and who we can't respond to? I mean, we are sick right, some of us are going die and life goes on. Those old posts have helped someone in some way and therefore have done what they are here to do, support. So what if someone brings up an old post....I don't mean to be so darn insensitive but death unfortunately is inevitable for us, with or without cancer, and as such I want you to know that should I pass on, please feel free to use my posts in any manner you choose, I will be dead and won't mind...honest. Sorry Carlene, you have awesome posts and I truly appreciate your hard work and keeping people informed and such but that was kind of bossy and cruel to new people that don't really think about it being an old post, they are scared and just grabbing at whatever they need to find comfort, I support that regardless.

    Those newer people come on to find answers and if an old post helps them to communicate, so be it.

    Thank you,
    Kelley
  • carolenk
    carolenk Member Posts: 907 Member
    #8
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    pstur1 said:

    I was going to bite my tongue but
    I surely appreciate your angst at reading old post from perhaps dearly departed friends and family, I get it truly. However, don't you think it is a little harsh to dictate who we can and who we can't respond to? I mean, we are sick right, some of us are going die and life goes on. Those old posts have helped someone in some way and therefore have done what they are here to do, support. So what if someone brings up an old post....I don't mean to be so darn insensitive but death unfortunately is inevitable for us, with or without cancer, and as such I want you to know that should I pass on, please feel free to use my posts in any manner you choose, I will be dead and won't mind...honest. Sorry Carlene, you have awesome posts and I truly appreciate your hard work and keeping people informed and such but that was kind of bossy and cruel to new people that don't really think about it being an old post, they are scared and just grabbing at whatever they need to find comfort, I support that regardless.

    Those newer people come on to find answers and if an old post helps them to communicate, so be it.

    Thank you,
    Kelley

    Gone but not forgotten
    I'd like to think Bonnie would be pleased to know that her words & faith can still help someone. I followed her postings from the beginning to the end. I don't imagine that I would be able to write as elegantly as she did under her circumstances. It takes an open heart to feel both love and pain.

    I think Carlene is just trying to protect us--I know she means well.

    Carolen
  • Hissy_Fitz
    Hissy_Fitz Member Posts: 1,834
    #9
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    pstur1 said:

    I was going to bite my tongue but
    I surely appreciate your angst at reading old post from perhaps dearly departed friends and family, I get it truly. However, don't you think it is a little harsh to dictate who we can and who we can't respond to? I mean, we are sick right, some of us are going die and life goes on. Those old posts have helped someone in some way and therefore have done what they are here to do, support. So what if someone brings up an old post....I don't mean to be so darn insensitive but death unfortunately is inevitable for us, with or without cancer, and as such I want you to know that should I pass on, please feel free to use my posts in any manner you choose, I will be dead and won't mind...honest. Sorry Carlene, you have awesome posts and I truly appreciate your hard work and keeping people informed and such but that was kind of bossy and cruel to new people that don't really think about it being an old post, they are scared and just grabbing at whatever they need to find comfort, I support that regardless.

    Those newer people come on to find answers and if an old post helps them to communicate, so be it.

    Thank you,
    Kelley

    I "dictated" whose posts you
    I "dictated" whose posts you can respond to? No....I simply said, as did many others, that it is painful for us to see Susan's photo, Linda's, Bonnie's, etc pop up with no warning, as if they were still alive and well. I did not demand that anyone stop digging up and responding to old threads, although the chances of those members responding is, well, badsically zero.

    I realize that none of our brave teal sisters would mind in the least. It's US who mind - the ones left behind who mourn their passing.

    You are absolutely under no obligation, Kelley, to give our feelings any respect at all. Please don't think I am trying to police your posts. This board has room for everyone, and all opinions are equal.

    Carlene
  • pstur1
    pstur1 Member Posts: 37
    #10
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    Hissy_Fitz said:

    I "dictated" whose posts you
    I "dictated" whose posts you can respond to? No....I simply said, as did many others, that it is painful for us to see Susan's photo, Linda's, Bonnie's, etc pop up with no warning, as if they were still alive and well. I did not demand that anyone stop digging up and responding to old threads, although the chances of those members responding is, well, badsically zero.

    I realize that none of our brave teal sisters would mind in the least. It's US who mind - the ones left behind who mourn their passing.

    You are absolutely under no obligation, Kelley, to give our feelings any respect at all. Please don't think I am trying to police your posts. This board has room for everyone, and all opinions are equal.

    Carlene

    Didn't mean to hit a nerve Hissy
    Please don't misunderstand, I didn't mean to hit a nerve or be rude but you did make the request that people check out the living status of a person before they respond to old threads. How would one do that and why would anyone think to do that? I am just saying, it is far easier for you and I and others to get over our sensibilities than it is to ask that someone new know the ropes and respond in kind about something they know nothing about is all. I apologize for my use of the word "dictate", I truly didn't mean that to come across as you being dictating in the sense of demanding, please do forgive my poor choice of word usage there.

    I realize that particular post brought up some feelings and hurt for you when you saw the "older" member post, I do understand that and certainly understand the lump in the throat at seeing words from a person no longer with us.

    But still hissy, it was a silly request to be honest. Expressing your angst of the post is completely understandable but to ask that anyone be more diligent in using old post is kind of over the top.

    Have a great day,
    Kelley
  • Hissy_Fitz
    Hissy_Fitz Member Posts: 1,834
    #11
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    pstur1 said:

    Didn't mean to hit a nerve Hissy
    Please don't misunderstand, I didn't mean to hit a nerve or be rude but you did make the request that people check out the living status of a person before they respond to old threads. How would one do that and why would anyone think to do that? I am just saying, it is far easier for you and I and others to get over our sensibilities than it is to ask that someone new know the ropes and respond in kind about something they know nothing about is all. I apologize for my use of the word "dictate", I truly didn't mean that to come across as you being dictating in the sense of demanding, please do forgive my poor choice of word usage there.

    I realize that particular post brought up some feelings and hurt for you when you saw the "older" member post, I do understand that and certainly understand the lump in the throat at seeing words from a person no longer with us.

    But still hissy, it was a silly request to be honest. Expressing your angst of the post is completely understandable but to ask that anyone be more diligent in using old post is kind of over the top.

    Have a great day,
    Kelley

    This seems so trivial, in
    This seems so trivial, in view of everything that is going on im my life today.

    Each of us is allowed to feel the way we feel. In fact, we can't help it. Whether I was "over the top" or not is your opinion, and you are entitled to it. We are about to lose Nancy and I really hope I don't see any of her old posts for awhile, especially from way back when, because she was so vibrant, and we thought she was doing better. Just 6 months ago, she was beautiful and radiant and hopeful.

    But feel free to make whatever observations you like.

    Carlene
  • pstur1
    pstur1 Member Posts: 37
    #12
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    Hissy_Fitz said:

    This seems so trivial, in
    This seems so trivial, in view of everything that is going on im my life today.

    Each of us is allowed to feel the way we feel. In fact, we can't help it. Whether I was "over the top" or not is your opinion, and you are entitled to it. We are about to lose Nancy and I really hope I don't see any of her old posts for awhile, especially from way back when, because she was so vibrant, and we thought she was doing better. Just 6 months ago, she was beautiful and radiant and hopeful.

    But feel free to make whatever observations you like.

    Carlene

    You have put me in my place....better now?
    Let me interpret your comment here for ya....

    "My day is not good, I am terribly distraught over a dear friend going through the end of life. Your opinions, ideas, feelings and thoughts have no merit. And now Kelley, feel really bad because someone is dying and you are being insensitive to something you posted before the news of Nancy."

    Yeah, that's the way to go. I'm done now so post again so you can have the last comment.

    Thanks Carlene
  • srwruns
    srwruns Member Posts: 343
    #13
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    Everyone has made their
    Everyone has made their point. Please everyone stop. I will feel totally rudderless if I I have to leave this board because I can't handle the stress of the sniping. We can't know what is in someone's mind/head/heart. I prefer that we believe people really have positive intentions when they communicate something. It's a painful time right now for all of us.
  • Tethys41
    Tethys41 Member Posts: 1,382 Member
    #14
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    pstur1 said:

    You have put me in my place....better now?
    Let me interpret your comment here for ya....

    "My day is not good, I am terribly distraught over a dear friend going through the end of life. Your opinions, ideas, feelings and thoughts have no merit. And now Kelley, feel really bad because someone is dying and you are being insensitive to something you posted before the news of Nancy."

    Yeah, that's the way to go. I'm done now so post again so you can have the last comment.

    Thanks Carlene

    Just my opinion, but...
    Maybe some of these posts would be more appropriate in a PM, rather than on the public forum.
  • djinco
    djinco Member Posts: 87
    #15
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    Let us never forget...
    I love all my Teal Sisters, both past and present. In the course of history we have all learned from those that came before us. When I was first diagnosed with ovarian cancer stage 3b and uterine cancer stage 2, I was petrified. ( I am sure all of you can relate.) During my first appointment with my Gyn/Onc after my surgery I asked my Doctor a question: "Am I going to die?" With a great deal of compassion and matter-of-factness his response was "yes." And he followed that answer with "we will all die one day." It is how we live that is important. Teal sisters, never give up the fight, but remember we are not in control of eternity. That is out of our hands, but there is hope beyond the now and we can learn from those who left us, in our minds, too early. Let us find comfort in knowing that the Teal Sisters who have left this earth, would probably want us to learn from their words and cherish their photos of them. God is good and everything is in his timing. I love you all. May peace reside always in our hearts and minds and may we all, both past and present continue to comfort the living and the newly diagnosed.
  • kikz
    kikz Member Posts: 1,345 Member
    #16
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    djinco said:

    Let us never forget...
    I love all my Teal Sisters, both past and present. In the course of history we have all learned from those that came before us. When I was first diagnosed with ovarian cancer stage 3b and uterine cancer stage 2, I was petrified. ( I am sure all of you can relate.) During my first appointment with my Gyn/Onc after my surgery I asked my Doctor a question: "Am I going to die?" With a great deal of compassion and matter-of-factness his response was "yes." And he followed that answer with "we will all die one day." It is how we live that is important. Teal sisters, never give up the fight, but remember we are not in control of eternity. That is out of our hands, but there is hope beyond the now and we can learn from those who left us, in our minds, too early. Let us find comfort in knowing that the Teal Sisters who have left this earth, would probably want us to learn from their words and cherish their photos of them. God is good and everything is in his timing. I love you all. May peace reside always in our hearts and minds and may we all, both past and present continue to comfort the living and the newly diagnosed.

    I don't like the sniping either but.......
    I'm glad to see teal sisters who have a lot of fight in them. It reminds me what a tough bunch we are. I guess we really are like sisters, there's bound to be an explosion once in a while.

    Karen
  • pstur1
    pstur1 Member Posts: 37
    #17
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    kikz said:

    I don't like the sniping either but.......
    I'm glad to see teal sisters who have a lot of fight in them. It reminds me what a tough bunch we are. I guess we really are like sisters, there's bound to be an explosion once in a while.

    Karen

    Hello kikz
    Yes, we are human and as such will disagree and at times even snipe as you put it. My last post on this was a snipe and I while I make no apologies as I will snipe back when sniped at...I am certainly not upset with anyone and as I said already...I get the anger, the whole picture....all good.

    I think each and every person on here is worthy of honesty, kindness, and at times even a snipe if for no other reason than to snap someone's reality back into check for them. But it's all good on this end and I certainly have no ill will towards Carlene, she is a fine person, we won't always agree, that's life.

    Hugs,
    Kelley

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