Shave or cut my hair? Or just wait for it to fall out?

mlavitt

Hi. My name is Michelle and I am new to this. I just started chemo (Taxotere and Cytoxan) for breast cancer, following the double mastectomy I had in April. Today I am 12 days out from my first round of chemo; I am told that my hair should start to fall out next week.

Right now it is shoulder length. I have two wigs ready to go. I am 38 and have two young kids (they know about the hair loss and wigs).

So what do I do? Shave my head completely before the hair loss starts? Cut it really short (like a pixie, which looks terrible on me)? Get a buzz cut like men do? Leave it alone? I have someone who can do this, but I am terrified of making a bad decision.

Any advice would be appreciated.

Thank you.

Michelle

lafera12

hair
Good morning Michelle,

I had my chemo in 2008, but I remember it like it was yesterday.
My hair started coming out within two weeks, I had my wigs before I
started. When it started to come out, I first had my hair cut very short,
but within a few days I had a buzz cut, I took my wigs to the beauty
shop with me, and started wearing them.
Hope this helps, but it is your choice what to do.
Angie

grams2jc

Hair
Hi Michelle

Sorry to say this decision must be yours. Personally, I went from nearly shoulder length to chin length, 10 days later pixie, and then shaved when it was coming out handfuls at a time. Didn't shave it when I probably should have cause it was a tough thing for me. Now I have had many positive comments about my new do - really my wig- that have made me feel better about it, but I sure will be glad to get enough of my own hair to throw this thing away.

Good luck,

Jennifer

Cinkal

I guess it is a personal
I guess it is a personal choice. My hair was shoulder length and I had it cut several times before chemo so I could gradually get used to it. After my second round of chemo, the oncologist said my hair would start falling out within 24 hours. On the way home from the infusion, I ran my fingers through my hair and small clumps came out. I was shocked it happened that fast.
I didn't want to see clumps of hair everywhere, so I decided to buzz it. My husband wanted to be the one to do it. I was for sure I would start crying. It wasn't as bad as I anticipated and I didn't cry. I am glad I buzzed it. Even with the buzz, there was a lot of hair after I showered. It would have been harder to see long clumps of hair.
I have finished four of eight treatments. I still have a little "fuzz' all over my head.
I have a wig which I have wore three times. I prefer wearing scarves and hats. The first week I went out in public I was nervous and self conscious. Now I forget I even have the scarf on. I was worried my two children would be embarrassed. My ten year old seemed fine with it. My eight year old hadn't told some of his friends about the cancer so he was worried what they would say.
Losing your hair is not fun. It is a personal journey and each individual deals with the situation differently. I just think of it as part of the healing process. I do what I have to do to be cancer free.
Good luck with your journey.

mamolady

Shave
Michelle,
I shaved my head when my hair started to fall out. I couldn't take the handfuls of hair I was getting. Some people don't loose all their hair though. You may want to start with a really short cute cut. Then if need be shave the rest. Find out where there is a "look good, feel better" class through the American Cancer Society. That was great class too.

Cindy

poplolly

Michelle,
I had mine cut
Michelle,

I had mine cut really short first. Then a week after that I had my husband shave my head. I was afraid it would be harder to watch the clumps of hair come out than just to get it off at once. A part of me wanted to think that I'd be different and my hair wouldn't come out. Not So--hair loss is a given.

butterflylvr

poplolly said:

Michelle,
I had mine cut
Michelle,

I had mine cut really short first. Then a week after that I had my husband shave my head. I was afraid it would be harder to watch the clumps of hair come out than just to get it off at once. A part of me wanted to think that I'd be different and my hair wouldn't come out. Not So--hair loss is a given.

Hi Michelle,
First of all {{{HUGS}}},

I worked through out my whole treatment process. My hair was shoulder length and I cut it real pixie short. My coworkers were always kept in touch with what ever I was going through and I thought this would be a good transition before the scarves and hats. I had it short for two weeks and Thanksgiving day my sister buzzed it off to about a quarter inch. Even that left a mess in the shower to clean up. So one day I got sick of looking at my head with all these bald patches, I took a towel in the shower with me and did the old cue ball rub. As hard as it is to lose that hair, it feels so much more powerful when you remove it yourself.

But like Chen said, no more shaving legs and armpits for a while.. It does have it's perks.

Lorrie

ender

butterflylvr said:

Hi Michelle,
First of all {{{HUGS}}},

I worked through out my whole treatment process. My hair was shoulder length and I cut it real pixie short. My coworkers were always kept in touch with what ever I was going through and I thought this would be a good transition before the scarves and hats. I had it short for two weeks and Thanksgiving day my sister buzzed it off to about a quarter inch. Even that left a mess in the shower to clean up. So one day I got sick of looking at my head with all these bald patches, I took a towel in the shower with me and did the old cue ball rub. As hard as it is to lose that hair, it feels so much more powerful when you remove it yourself.

But like Chen said, no more shaving legs and armpits for a while.. It does have it's perks.

Lorrie

Hi Michelle!
It seems you
Hi Michelle!

It seems you and I are chemo buddies. I am on day 13 after my first round of Cytoxan and Taxotere. I had some 15 inches of thick hair. Have always worn my hair long and take great pride in my hair. I decided to get a pixie cut. I thought I would get all emotional about it. But I did not. It was initially even fun and liberating to have a short cut. Now I'm in your boat, pulling on my hair each morning to see if it is coming out. Like others have said, it's a personal choice. I would say not to worry so much about making the right choice. There is no "right" choice and even if you regret the choice you make the consequence is temporary.

I hope this was useful.

Eva

jessiesmom1

Hair Loss during chemo
Hi Michelle,

First of all, there are no bad decisions when it comes to what you do during the hair loss period of time. You just have to figure out what suits you best. I had 4 rounds of A/C followed by 12 rounds of Taxotere. My hair started falling out on precisely Day 10 of my first round of A/C. I had thick, straight, shoulder length hair prior to chemo which I had cut short to prepare myself for going bald. I figured it would be less dramatic going from short hair to no hair. It took another 2 weeks before I felt my hair started looking ridiculous and was just serving no purpose. At that point I had my husband shave off what remained. For me at least it was very traumatic. I cried. I cried every time I looked in the mirror for several weeks. Eventually I found the baldness fascinating in an odd sort of way. It certainly cut down on my shower time. A little soap on the scalp and I was good to go. Baldness is, however, cold. I wore some kind of cap even when I was indoors on most days. Sometimes I wore my wig - depending on where I was going. Most people could not even tell I was wearing a wig. My daughter was a 17 year old high school senior while this was going on. During Spring Break she went out of town for 2 weeks. When she left I had hair. When she came back I was completely bald. Talk about a shock. I wore my wig to the airport. Both she and my husband got used to it pretty quickly. They had no choice. It is what it is.

My last chemo was about 10 months ago. Now I have a full head of salt & pepper color "chemo curls." Never had curly hair before so this is strange for me. Sure beats the alternative though. Even my oncologist remarked last week, "You have more hair every time I see you."

I believe that Chen mentioned the hair loss EVERYWHERE. That is true (well it was for me) and is something that seems to get glossed over during a discussion of hair loss. Of course, most people won't see that, just you and your spouse most likely. Just another chemo oddity.

You CAN do this. Good luck. IRENE

Mitzi333

jessiesmom1 said:

Hair Loss during chemo
Hi Michelle,

First of all, there are no bad decisions when it comes to what you do during the hair loss period of time. You just have to figure out what suits you best. I had 4 rounds of A/C followed by 12 rounds of Taxotere. My hair started falling out on precisely Day 10 of my first round of A/C. I had thick, straight, shoulder length hair prior to chemo which I had cut short to prepare myself for going bald. I figured it would be less dramatic going from short hair to no hair. It took another 2 weeks before I felt my hair started looking ridiculous and was just serving no purpose. At that point I had my husband shave off what remained. For me at least it was very traumatic. I cried. I cried every time I looked in the mirror for several weeks. Eventually I found the baldness fascinating in an odd sort of way. It certainly cut down on my shower time. A little soap on the scalp and I was good to go. Baldness is, however, cold. I wore some kind of cap even when I was indoors on most days. Sometimes I wore my wig - depending on where I was going. Most people could not even tell I was wearing a wig. My daughter was a 17 year old high school senior while this was going on. During Spring Break she went out of town for 2 weeks. When she left I had hair. When she came back I was completely bald. Talk about a shock. I wore my wig to the airport. Both she and my husband got used to it pretty quickly. They had no choice. It is what it is.

My last chemo was about 10 months ago. Now I have a full head of salt & pepper color "chemo curls." Never had curly hair before so this is strange for me. Sure beats the alternative though. Even my oncologist remarked last week, "You have more hair every time I see you."

I believe that Chen mentioned the hair loss EVERYWHERE. That is true (well it was for me) and is something that seems to get glossed over during a discussion of hair loss. Of course, most people won't see that, just you and your spouse most likely. Just another chemo oddity.

You CAN do this. Good luck. IRENE

Personal Decision...
Hi Michelle... Have to agree with the others, the decision is up to you and your preference. We all have our stories of what worked for us, which should help in your decision. I had shoulder length hair at the time of DX, and decied to cut it short, so the loss wasn't soooo devastating. Good decision for me. When my hair started falling out, it was not a big deal, cause it was short. I can't imagine long stands of hair fallind out. For me, that would have been more impactful. My boyfriend shaved my head and keeps it real low... it's GREAT!!! I love the shaved head. Feels Great.


Wishing You all the Best on your journey!!!

Hugs,
Mitzi ;0)

BioAdoptMom

I just finished my second
I just finished my second T/C. About 3 weeks before my first one I had it cut to shoulder length. A week after treatment #1 I had it buzzed by my hairdresser, who is also a good friend. Five days after that it started shedding something fierce and I am so glad I had had it done. Maybe it's just me, but I thought it would be much more traumatic to have longer hair suddenly coming out in clumps. I am pretty much totally bald now. Glad I did it the way I did it! Good luck to you. I know how hard this is. (((HUGS)))

Nancy

chenheart

Hair loss is ( dammit!) an
Hair loss is ( dammit!) an internal reaction to the chemo rather than an external one,so no amount of TLC will keep it. It is horrible when you shower and it comes out in huge clumps, when your bed pillow looks like 3 dogs slept on it, and for me, the worst part was finding copious amounts of hair all over the kitchen and in the dinners I was determined to fix. Aside from that, a side-effect is for many of us, scalp tenderness/pain. Rather like the feeling of having left rubberbands in toooooo long! OUCH! This is all remedied by ( sigh) buzzing it off.

While we are on the subject, I sure wish my Dr had told me, rather than me having to figure it out by myself, that ANYWHERE you have hair, well, you won't! Eyebrows, lashes, nosehairs, underarms, legs, and all places inbetween will be slicker than a newborn baby.

Sorry you are having to go through this, but it is doable, and will be part of your past as you maneuver your way to Life After Cancer!

Hugs,
Chen♥

jendrey

BioAdoptMom said:

I just finished my second
I just finished my second T/C. About 3 weeks before my first one I had it cut to shoulder length. A week after treatment #1 I had it buzzed by my hairdresser, who is also a good friend. Five days after that it started shedding something fierce and I am so glad I had had it done. Maybe it's just me, but I thought it would be much more traumatic to have longer hair suddenly coming out in clumps. I am pretty much totally bald now. Glad I did it the way I did it! Good luck to you. I know how hard this is. (((HUGS)))

Nancy

...
Hi Michelle - sorry you have to be here but glad you found us.

Prior to chemo I had really long, thick hair that grew very fast. I couldn't put it into a ponytail because it was so thick that the weight of the ponytail would actually hurt.
My hair started to come out in clumps 8 days after my first chemo. I had been using spray gel (Herbal Essence) to sort of 'cement' my hair into place cause the less I fiddled with it the less that seemed to come out.

Ah, but on day 7 I instead used hair spray which doesn't just rinse away clean like the gel. My bad. I woke up on day 8 with my hair sticky stuck in huge clumps that no amount of finger combing could untangle. In fact, I just managed to make it worse a handful at a time.

By this time I had a head full of very sparse randomly placed patches of hair..reminded me of when a balding man might do a come-over with the scalp obviously showing through. Ever the vain one, I then donned a hat. For having so little hair left to see on my head I sure did find lots of it just everywhere.

Then it got to the point where it was becoming ridiculous. So, to gain back some small measure of control over the situation I shaved the rest off in the shower.

I bought a wig, but it had problems and I ended up wearing headwraps that I made myself. I absolutely did not want for a scarf to come off while I was sleeping and the ones I made myself never did.

I can make you a few if you like?

sinee

I cut mine, then had my
I cut mine, then had my daughter in law shave it for me, I still cried in the shower as it came out in my hands. So it was still emotional, just easier to clean up. So yeah it is personal, do what you need to do, to make it as easy for you as possible. I never got into wearing a wig, just a baseball cap. Now about 5 weeks after chemo the hairs growing, so looking forward to having hair again. It doesn't last forever, and it really is the only proof you are a survivor. Not like you can have a cast on your broken breast and people will say oh dear what happened? Take it in stride and wear it like a warrior that you are. God Bless you, hold you, and may you be surrounded with loving caring friends and family during this challenging time. You will be fine, just cry when you need to~and laugh twice as often as you cry. Cindy

mlavitt

Thank you
Thank you everyone for your advice. It really helps!

margz35

It is your choice but ....
My first treatment was May 2 and my hair fell out on Day 20 - I was lucky. I combed it gently and I had below shoulder length hair and now look like a bad zombie mask from Halloween. I lightly trimmed it but won't shave it. I have worn my wig regularly and today wore it to my 2nd chemo and everyone said "you still have your hair?" It was awesome.
My wig is by Raquel Welch - "Infatuation" and even the highlights are 99% like my old hair.

Take care - your decision.
PTTPP (Power to the Pink People)
Margz