May I introduce myself?

EvelynM

Hi everyone

I've just plucked up the courage to join. I've spent many months reading lots of forums and came to the conclusion this is the most active and most supportive, positive and honest bunch of people. So here I am. However, this is about my mum.

I live in the UK, luckily not far from my parents. My mum is 75 and was diagnosed with Stage IIIC OC in early Dec 2010. She had the symptoms for 6-8 months but her doctor mis-diagnosed as IBS and it was only when she saw a hospital doctor a week before a planned hip replacement op and she took one look at her and saw how much pain she was in that she sent her for a scan and that set the ball rolling. My mum had pleaded with her own doctor to have a scan but he ignored her requests. Therein lies another story which would take too long to tell but suffice to say we were very angry with this doctor.

Mum was admitted to hospital a week before the planned out-patient appointment, with severe pain and bloating. She was so ill, the nurses were shocked her doc hadn't admitted her previously. She had a laparotomy, the biopsies from which gave the diagnosis. She started a once every 4 weeks dose of Carboplatin on Xmas Eve and had the 6th one last week. They said the plan is to reduce the tumours and then operate with possibly more chemo thereafter.

Mum was very ill and spent 2.5 months in hospital. I visited every single night and every time I drove home I never thought she'd survive till the next night. She had a bowel obstruction and didn't eat a thing for 5 weeks. She lost 35 pounds but the obstruction cleared, the first ca125 came back as half the figure it started as, and she gradually got some strength back. I stayed with my dad while she was in hospital as he has advanced prostate cancer.

Her ca125 has been 410 (at diagnosis before 1st chemo), 187 before 2nd chemo, 107 before 3rd chemo, 97 before 4th, 47 before 5th and 51 before 6th. She had a bad kidney infection a week before the last one so the doc thinks that's why it went up slightly. One more test due in 2 weeks then scan is due on 20th May and to see consultant on 1st June.

She has had every side-effect possible, even though I know Carbo on its own is not as rough as the other chemos. I am so proud of her and the strength and fight she has shown.

It has really helped me to type all this out as I have been holding in a lot of emotion all this time, trying to be strong for everyone. I have a brother but he's no help so I do everything myself. I love my mum dearly. She is so precious to me. I know you will all understand I have been through every emotion possible. I admire all you ladies for your strength and courage. Sorry for the long post. I do tend to go on a bit!!

Evelyn

poopergirl14052

welcome Eve
You have come to the right place. We have a few ladies from the UK here also. Your mom sounds like a very srong ladt and I wish her well. I was on carbo/taxol too and responed well after my initial surgery. Yhe side effects are difficult at times but somehow you get through it. Keep us posted and show your mom the board...val

jonnie71

welcome
Hi Evelyn,

I have only been on here for 2 weeks myself. However the women here have been very supportive and encouraging. I am so sorry for what your mum and your family is going through. The one thing that stands out to me in your post is that you need to take some time, maybe even just an hour or two, to yourself. You cannot take care of anyone else if you do not take care of yourself. I don't know if you are involved with a church, have other family or friends, but you need to share the load a little..... even if it is very small. i hope you are creative and find a way for that.

Your mum sounds incredibly strong, i envy her strength. i feel as though i wimp out sometime. anyway, i will keep her in my prayers, and feel free to vent to me anytime.
jonnie

carolenk

poopergirl14052 said:

welcome Eve
You have come to the right place. We have a few ladies from the UK here also. Your mom sounds like a very srong ladt and I wish her well. I was on carbo/taxol too and responed well after my initial surgery. Yhe side effects are difficult at times but somehow you get through it. Keep us posted and show your mom the board...val

Welcome to this discussion
Welcome to this discussion board & thank you for sharing your story--I know how hard it is to put it in writing.

My doctor made a comment to me that he sees a lot of women (like I was) who are really sick..."Then they get chemo and get better!" I hope this is true for your mum as it was for me.

You are a good daughter and just being there for your mum is helping her more than you know.

Stay strong & remember to take care of yourself, too.

Carolen

kikz

jonnie71 said:

welcome
Hi Evelyn,

I have only been on here for 2 weeks myself. However the women here have been very supportive and encouraging. I am so sorry for what your mum and your family is going through. The one thing that stands out to me in your post is that you need to take some time, maybe even just an hour or two, to yourself. You cannot take care of anyone else if you do not take care of yourself. I don't know if you are involved with a church, have other family or friends, but you need to share the load a little..... even if it is very small. i hope you are creative and find a way for that.

Your mum sounds incredibly strong, i envy her strength. i feel as though i wimp out sometime. anyway, i will keep her in my prayers, and feel free to vent to me anytime.
jonnie

Welcome Evelyn
It's a hard road but it does get better. I told my doctor that if I had known at the beginning what I would have to go through I would have jumped in front of a bus. But now that I am feeling so good I know it was well worth the suffering my family, friends and I went through. As I told my mom the day of my diagnosis; it is what it is and we just have to deal with it.

You will find women here who are so knowledgeable and suppportive. It was a lifesaver when I found this board. I found people who "really understood" what I was going through.

Karen

childofthestars

Welcome - unfotunately
Hi Evelyn
Sorry you (and your mum) has to join this 'club' but as so many of the lovely ladies on this board say you are in the right place for lots of help and support.
I live in the UK - whereabouts are u?
I have lived both sides of the coin - my mum was diagnosed with ovca in 1997 so i KNOW what it feels like to have a mother with this diagnosis!!! I was then diagnosed with ovca last June!!!!
It is a hard road from both points of view but it IS copable with support and being able to vent on a board like this. Just make sure that you do take some time for yourself too as this is important.
Everyone is here for eachother.
Michelle x

Lea19

Evelyn
Evelyn,

No need to apologize for going on too long.

It sounds like you have a lot on your plate watching both of your parents struggle with illness. I am so sorry about that! I'm sorry your mum was misdiagnosed - so many of us are. It sounds like your mom had a very tough time of it. I pray that the scan will show NED and this awful disease will be behind her soon.

It's understandable that you are heart sick and emotional. It's best to share those feelings. Welcome.

Lea

EvelynM

Lea19 said:

Evelyn
Evelyn,

No need to apologize for going on too long.

It sounds like you have a lot on your plate watching both of your parents struggle with illness. I am so sorry about that! I'm sorry your mum was misdiagnosed - so many of us are. It sounds like your mom had a very tough time of it. I pray that the scan will show NED and this awful disease will be behind her soon.

It's understandable that you are heart sick and emotional. It's best to share those feelings. Welcome.

Lea

Wow, ladies, I am touched
Wow, ladies, I am touched with your quick responses. I don't really use forums so this is quite novel for me. I can see why people find it supportive, seeing that people read my rambling post and cared enough to comment.

I'm in the UK - Edinburgh, Scotland.

The current difficult bit is the waiting game for my mum. Another 10 days till the scan and another 10 after that till we find out if the chemo has done it's stuff. Mum is in her 1st week after the (last scheduled) chemo which she always finds the worst. Sleeps a lot, gets ringing in her ears and screws her eyes up when looking at you as it affects her sight too. She gets a daily visit from the district nurse who administers a Heparin injection as she has/had clots. Despite it all, she tries to retain the spirit that makes her "my mum". She has a dry sense of humour that peeks out now and again.

I am trying hard to look after myself. It's just impossible to relax totally when this disease is part of you or your loved ones, isn't it?

Thanks again to you all. I look forward to getting to know you all better.

Evelyn xxx

PS - I'd like to add my photo so you can see it here beside my name, but I can't find how to do it. Can anyone help please? Thanks!

Mwee

EvelynM said:

Wow, ladies, I am touched
Wow, ladies, I am touched with your quick responses. I don't really use forums so this is quite novel for me. I can see why people find it supportive, seeing that people read my rambling post and cared enough to comment.

I'm in the UK - Edinburgh, Scotland.

The current difficult bit is the waiting game for my mum. Another 10 days till the scan and another 10 after that till we find out if the chemo has done it's stuff. Mum is in her 1st week after the (last scheduled) chemo which she always finds the worst. Sleeps a lot, gets ringing in her ears and screws her eyes up when looking at you as it affects her sight too. She gets a daily visit from the district nurse who administers a Heparin injection as she has/had clots. Despite it all, she tries to retain the spirit that makes her "my mum". She has a dry sense of humour that peeks out now and again.

I am trying hard to look after myself. It's just impossible to relax totally when this disease is part of you or your loved ones, isn't it?

Thanks again to you all. I look forward to getting to know you all better.

Evelyn xxx

PS - I'd like to add my photo so you can see it here beside my name, but I can't find how to do it. Can anyone help please? Thanks!

Welcome!
About adding a photo.... at the top of this page you'll find a a tab that says "click here to create or update your about me page". We love photos! We all look forward to getting to know you and your Mom better, also. The love, support and great information the I have gotten for this site has carried me through many a dark day!
(((HUGS))) Maria

JoWin615

Mwee said:

Welcome!
About adding a photo.... at the top of this page you'll find a a tab that says "click here to create or update your about me page". We love photos! We all look forward to getting to know you and your Mom better, also. The love, support and great information the I have gotten for this site has carried me through many a dark day!
(((HUGS))) Maria

Your mom sounds like a fighter!
Hi Evelyn,

I'm new here too. So far I haven't actually initiated a post yet, but I do log on every day and read what others say. It is a wonderful support group.

I salute you and your mom for the courageous way in which you are facing her challenges together. I can absolutely relate to the stress created by WAITING! I spent nearly the entire month of January knowing I had cancer but not knowing where. After many scans, MRIs, and ultrasounds, I was finally referred to the best gynecological oncologist around, and guess what? I had to wait another 2 weeks to get in to see him!

I look forward to following your mom's progress, and wish you and your whole family all the best.

Jo

P.S. I had a great visit to Edinburgh in July, 2001, except for freezing my butt off. (I'm from Florida!).