Off topic....may be my last dutch treat....sigh....

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  • tootsie1
    tootsie1 Member Posts: 5,044 Member
    #22
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    Oh, dear.
    Oh, Kathi.

    I must have sensed something was up. Yesterday I was thinking of you and Hans and telling myself I needed to send you a pm to see how things were going. I was thinking about when you were taking care of Hans and things were difficult. It seemed like things had gotten so much better.

    I'm so sorry. Even if it really, really is the best thing in the world for both of you, it hurts. You've been together a long time and have been through so much together..

    Please message me if you need/want to.

    *hugs*
    Gail
  • EveningStar2
    EveningStar2 Member Posts: 491 Member
    #23
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    Wow!
    Didn't see that coming!

    Like so many others have said: you are a strong woman and do what you need to do. It isn't easy but apparently, it is necessary. Anything that any of us can do, just let us know. Good wishes and luck to you.

    Maureen
  • fauxma
    fauxma Member Posts: 3,577 Member
    #24
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    EveningStar2 said:

    Wow!
    Didn't see that coming!

    Like so many others have said: you are a strong woman and do what you need to do. It isn't easy but apparently, it is necessary. Anything that any of us can do, just let us know. Good wishes and luck to you.

    Maureen

    Kathi,
    I will only say that
    Kathi,
    I will only say that from what I read here you are a strong woman who does not rush into anything headlong. You take time and make your choices based on what is best for you. I think you will do that now. I will keep you snugly in my good thoughts and prayers that everything works out well for you. You deserve to have a life filled with joy and happiness and I know that you will find it. We are all here for you. I think Aortus ssid it well about losses. But as clique as it seems I think there is truth to that statement, when one door closes another opens. We found that true after cancer, bankruptcy, losing our jobs and our home of 33 years. We are loving our new life so I hope that you find a new wonderful life.
    Stef
  • Jean 0609
    Jean 0609 Member Posts: 2,462
    #25
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    Dear Kathi,
    I don't know what to say. You are such a strong woman. I know this is so hard for you. Sending positive thoughts, prayers & a big hug your way.

    xoxo,
    Jean
  • Bella Luna
    Bella Luna Member Posts: 1,578 Member
    #26
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    Jean 0609 said:

    Dear Kathi,
    I don't know what to say. You are such a strong woman. I know this is so hard for you. Sending positive thoughts, prayers & a big hug your way.

    xoxo,
    Jean

    Had to pop in again to say
    Had to pop in again to say much LOVE to you dear Kathi. You are in my thoughts today.
    Ines
  • KathiM
    KathiM Member Posts: 8,028 Member
    #27
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    You all are such dear souls!!!!
    Thank you for all of your kind words and support!!!!!

    We are 'continuing negotiations'. Nothing is for certain yet. BUT, because I was able to 'voice' my thoughts with you all, I am able to talk calmly and without anger as to what has happened and what needs to happen.

    I am forever grateful to each and every one of you, my dear sisters!

    I have decided to stay until my 'normal' time to come home...otherwise, it's $250 to change the air ticket....I feel a bit like Mary Poppins..."I'll stay until the wind changes" *smile*.

    BIG hugs to each and every one of you for all of the concern, and the suggestions! It truly means the world to me!!!

    Hugs, Kathi
  • chenheart
    chenheart Member Posts: 5,159
    #28
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    KathiM said:

    You all are such dear souls!!!!
    Thank you for all of your kind words and support!!!!!

    We are 'continuing negotiations'. Nothing is for certain yet. BUT, because I was able to 'voice' my thoughts with you all, I am able to talk calmly and without anger as to what has happened and what needs to happen.

    I am forever grateful to each and every one of you, my dear sisters!

    I have decided to stay until my 'normal' time to come home...otherwise, it's $250 to change the air ticket....I feel a bit like Mary Poppins..."I'll stay until the wind changes" *smile*.

    BIG hugs to each and every one of you for all of the concern, and the suggestions! It truly means the world to me!!!

    Hugs, Kathi

    Oh yeah....I forgot to
    Oh yeah....I forgot to mention "We do what we have to do, so we can do what we want to do."

    How did I forget that??? LOL

    Love you!
    Chen♥
  • yv1214
    yv1214 Member Posts: 72
    #29
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    chenheart said:

    Oh yeah....I forgot to
    Oh yeah....I forgot to mention "We do what we have to do, so we can do what we want to do."

    How did I forget that??? LOL

    Love you!
    Chen♥

    Sorry....
    you are going through this. I wish you luck and courage through this next journey of your life.

    Big cyber <<<hug>>>

    Yessy
  • creampuff91344
    creampuff91344 Member Posts: 988
    #30
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    yv1214 said:

    Sorry....
    you are going through this. I wish you luck and courage through this next journey of your life.

    Big cyber <<<hug>>>

    Yessy

    My dear Kathi
    Although this comes as a shock to us all (you included), I have taken a couple of days to think about your earlier post. It reminds me of my first marriage, which lasted 18 years, and how when it came to an end I literally exhaled for the first time is many years. Your relationship is yours to make decision on, and believe me when I say that if anyone can do what is right for themselves, it is you. Your strength has allowed you to not only fight bc and colorectal cancer, but care for Hans when he has had his own medical issues. This takes such a toll on a relationship, although we don't mind being there for the one we love. Time does make changes in how our relationships develop, and we become complacent to things that would normally be small issues. In my own case, I was drifting through life, raising three children, and drifting further and further away from what should have been my main priority.....maintaining a healthy relationship with the one person in my life that should have been there through all that life threw at us. In the end, I knew I had made the right decision when I called him at his office, told him it was time we seriously sat down and talked about divorce, and he was silent for about 30 seconds (while I am hearing rustling in the background.) He finally said, "I think you are right....how about next Tuesday". Well, you can imagine how comfortable that made me feel. We lived in the same house, ate at the same table, attended functions with the children for the next seven days, and he finally "fit me into his schedule" to discuss ending our marriage. What I am trying to say is, only you and Hans know what truly takes place behind closed doors. Your decision is one that only you can make, and given that you have really faced reality over the past few years, you need not deprive yourself of true happiness in your life. I am in your corner, and know you will do what is best for you. Who knows, the beginning of your next journey may bring you to an even better place than you have ever been. Sending all of the hugs I can muster. Judy
  • trainer
    trainer Member Posts: 241
    #31
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    Your decision
    You have been such an inspiration to others and you have the kindest heart. I am sorry you are going through the stress.

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