Worried about family

Ok, I admit it, I am scared. The closer it gets to Tuesday the less sleep I get. I can get to sleep, I just can't seem to stay asleep. I've been up since 3AM just dozing off an on this morning. I know it's just stress, but man I have been down this road so many times I should be used to it. I haven't cried much because I don't know what to cry about. Frustration, Anger, Fear, Uncertainty? All of the above I guess.

What has me the most worried? My family. Pretty much all I have on MY side is my 84 year old father, and 57 year old sister. My dad is getting more and more forgetful and doesn't handle this stuff well. He's determined to come to my appt Tuesday and lives about 2.50 hours from me. I am afraid he'll get upset and get lost. I called today and asked that my step-mother drive him....I sincerely hope she does. I don't know how to deal with my Dad when he freaks over medical stuff and I have been doing my best to sound "in control, and in good spirits in an effort to help him feel better. It's much easier to do over the phone than it will be to do in person. My sister talks about coming up here (she's in Austin Texas) and I am in Kansas, but she doesn't deal with it well either.

Thank goodness they both kind of distance themselves because I am pretty open about all of this stuff and talk like it's just every day stuff..it IS in my world and they just don't know how to deal with it.

Sorry for the whining guys...just needed to get it off my chest. Take care everyone.
Hey, how is Lisha?

Beth

Comments

  • COBRA666
    COBRA666 Member Posts: 2,401 Member
    Worried and everything else
    Beth,
    it is normal to go what you are going thru. This is the place to get it off your chest.We are all worried like you are,but of course not in the same way you are.You know what I mean.I know your head is spinning like a top the closer you get to Tuesday. You have only got 2 days to go and it seems like years. Just try to relax. Anytime you feel likt,just jump on here and try to talk it all out. John(FNHL-1-4A-5/10)
  • JoanieP
    JoanieP Member Posts: 573
    So sorry
    Beth I am so sorry you are going through this horrible wait period. I wish I didn't live so far away. I would be glad to go to the Dr.with you. Please know that you are loved and appreciated. You have helped so many people on this site with your kind words. So many people on this site go with you in spirit to that Tuesday appointment. Let us know. Take care. Joanie
  • KC13167
    KC13167 Member Posts: 215
    Worried
    Oh, Beth. You are not whining. As John said, this is normal. I HATE, HATE, HATE the waiting too.

    I usually have someone go to the onco appointment with me. It's a double edged sword....I like the fact that I have someone there to support me yet, I feel that it is my responsibility to soften whatever the onco says, to somehow lessen the worry that whomever accompanied me may feel. I totally know what you described in your post.

    I will continue to pray for you. You are a very caring and sensitive woman. We are here to listen, anytime of the day or night. My best to you. Kellie
  • allmost60
    allmost60 Member Posts: 3,178
    Calming the family...
    Hi Beth,
    Un-like you, I have 7 sisters and Steve has 3 sisters and 3 brothers. Add in all of the adult children/grandchildren,nieces, nephews,sis/bro-in-laws on both sides, close friends and caring neighbors...well... the balancing act of keeping everyone calm quickly becomes a daunting task. It took me June, July, August and most of September to finely figure out the best way to convey my cancer information(tests, treatments doctor appts)etc to everyone. The one thing I learned quickly was to stay calm and up-beat when talking to them. The calmer I was, the better they all re-acted, which eased up the constant phone calls taking place. Now that I've been through the first go-around, I hope I've learned enough to handle things better when this comes back for round 2. I don't know..we will just have to wait and see. I can't help but believe it's going to be hard no matter how many times we go through this. So many people care and it's only natural for them to want to be informed or try to help us. You have a "big" family here waiting with you Beth, and many of us are saying daily prayers for you. Just imagine how it would be for you if we all had your phone#...hahaha! If that didn't freak you out...nothin will! Seriously...hang in there sweetie..we will be here for you every step of the way. Love...Sue
    (FNHL-2-3A-6/10)
  • COBRA666
    COBRA666 Member Posts: 2,401 Member
    allmost60 said:

    Calming the family...
    Hi Beth,
    Un-like you, I have 7 sisters and Steve has 3 sisters and 3 brothers. Add in all of the adult children/grandchildren,nieces, nephews,sis/bro-in-laws on both sides, close friends and caring neighbors...well... the balancing act of keeping everyone calm quickly becomes a daunting task. It took me June, July, August and most of September to finely figure out the best way to convey my cancer information(tests, treatments doctor appts)etc to everyone. The one thing I learned quickly was to stay calm and up-beat when talking to them. The calmer I was, the better they all re-acted, which eased up the constant phone calls taking place. Now that I've been through the first go-around, I hope I've learned enough to handle things better when this comes back for round 2. I don't know..we will just have to wait and see. I can't help but believe it's going to be hard no matter how many times we go through this. So many people care and it's only natural for them to want to be informed or try to help us. You have a "big" family here waiting with you Beth, and many of us are saying daily prayers for you. Just imagine how it would be for you if we all had your phone#...hahaha! If that didn't freak you out...nothin will! Seriously...hang in there sweetie..we will be here for you every step of the way. Love...Sue
    (FNHL-2-3A-6/10)

    Family
    Sue,
    When I first started reading your post I thought of the Brady Bunch and when I read a little more I thought of a trIbe and a little farther I think we are talking about 1/2 the population of Washington State. Just feel crazy tonight.LOL JohnFNHL-1-4A-5/10)
  • COBRA666
    COBRA666 Member Posts: 2,401 Member
    allmost60 said:

    Calming the family...
    Hi Beth,
    Un-like you, I have 7 sisters and Steve has 3 sisters and 3 brothers. Add in all of the adult children/grandchildren,nieces, nephews,sis/bro-in-laws on both sides, close friends and caring neighbors...well... the balancing act of keeping everyone calm quickly becomes a daunting task. It took me June, July, August and most of September to finely figure out the best way to convey my cancer information(tests, treatments doctor appts)etc to everyone. The one thing I learned quickly was to stay calm and up-beat when talking to them. The calmer I was, the better they all re-acted, which eased up the constant phone calls taking place. Now that I've been through the first go-around, I hope I've learned enough to handle things better when this comes back for round 2. I don't know..we will just have to wait and see. I can't help but believe it's going to be hard no matter how many times we go through this. So many people care and it's only natural for them to want to be informed or try to help us. You have a "big" family here waiting with you Beth, and many of us are saying daily prayers for you. Just imagine how it would be for you if we all had your phone#...hahaha! If that didn't freak you out...nothin will! Seriously...hang in there sweetie..we will be here for you every step of the way. Love...Sue
    (FNHL-2-3A-6/10)

    Family
    Sue,
    When I first started reading your post I thought of the Brady Bunch and when I read a little more I thought of a trIbe and a little farther I think we are talking about 1/2 the population of Washington State. Just feel crazy tonight.LOL John(FNHL-1-4A-5/10)
  • COBRA666
    COBRA666 Member Posts: 2,401 Member
    allmost60 said:

    Calming the family...
    Hi Beth,
    Un-like you, I have 7 sisters and Steve has 3 sisters and 3 brothers. Add in all of the adult children/grandchildren,nieces, nephews,sis/bro-in-laws on both sides, close friends and caring neighbors...well... the balancing act of keeping everyone calm quickly becomes a daunting task. It took me June, July, August and most of September to finely figure out the best way to convey my cancer information(tests, treatments doctor appts)etc to everyone. The one thing I learned quickly was to stay calm and up-beat when talking to them. The calmer I was, the better they all re-acted, which eased up the constant phone calls taking place. Now that I've been through the first go-around, I hope I've learned enough to handle things better when this comes back for round 2. I don't know..we will just have to wait and see. I can't help but believe it's going to be hard no matter how many times we go through this. So many people care and it's only natural for them to want to be informed or try to help us. You have a "big" family here waiting with you Beth, and many of us are saying daily prayers for you. Just imagine how it would be for you if we all had your phone#...hahaha! If that didn't freak you out...nothin will! Seriously...hang in there sweetie..we will be here for you every step of the way. Love...Sue
    (FNHL-2-3A-6/10)

    Family
    Sue,
    When I first started reading your post I thought of the Brady Bunch and when I read a little more I thought of a trIbe and a little farther I think we are talking about 1/2 the population of Washington State. Just feel crazy tonight.LOL John(FNHL-1-4A-5/10)
  • allmost60
    allmost60 Member Posts: 3,178
    COBRA666 said:

    Family
    Sue,
    When I first started reading your post I thought of the Brady Bunch and when I read a little more I thought of a trIbe and a little farther I think we are talking about 1/2 the population of Washington State. Just feel crazy tonight.LOL John(FNHL-1-4A-5/10)

    hahaha!
    Your computer must be feeling crazy tonight also..hahaha! You have no idea how crazy it can get with just my 7 sisters! Thats a whole lot of estrogen and PMS to deal with! The first month of my diagnosis I was getting phone calls non-stop. If they couldn't get me on the house phone they would call my cell phone...if I didn't pick it up, they would call my boys at home. I remember one time talking to one sister on the land-line and having Steve hand me my cell phone with another sister calling...it was a freaking zoo. We've worked out a good system now, but every so often one of them will go in a panic mode and get everyone crazy. It's nice to be loved...ha! Sue