Starting a family after...

Ginachan

I am two-time survivor of Alveolar Rhabdomayosarcoma. My first diagnosis was when I was 19, and my most recent was just over two years ago, at the age of 24. When I was initially diagnosed I was extremely concerned about possible fertility issues resulting from treatment. My oncologist assured me things should be okay.

Sure enough, my boyfriend and I were surprised to find that I was pregnant only nine months after finishing treatment. Due to the fact that I conceived so soon after finishing treatment, I chose to abort the pregnancy (for many reasons, that most recent patients can understand).

So now, it is seven years later, and I am two years out of treatment for the recurrence I experienced. I recently just got married in August 2010, and am getting a divorce from my husband (an eight year relationship), in part, because he changed his mind about staring a family with me. I am now living with a friend of mine, and have commissioned the help of another long-term friend of mine to help me conceive a child. I know that there are GREAT risks in trying to have a baby two years after finishing treatment. And thne you add into it all the social stigma of being a single mother, AND being a recent cancer survivor. There is nothing more that I want in this world that to be a momma. And there is no greater fear that I have, than that I will have another reoccurrence and not be able to be the mother I want to be.

I am so afraid of what people will say, and what I will do if things go "badly" again, but this dream is too important to me to just let go of, or to put on hold again. What if I don't get this opportunity again? Someone please tell me that I'm not making a terrible mistake?