Would you 'shave' your head -

Rague

in support of a friend/family member?

Just wondering - there are some of us who have lost our hair to Chemo and some who haven't. So - would your be willing to 'shave'/clipper your hair in support of a friend/family member? Would you try to organize an event with several people participating? There is no 'right' or 'wrong' answer - we are each who we are and many other options.

Personally - I would have no problem having the clippers run over my head again but i would try to get others involved and turn it into a fund raising event.

Susan

aysemari

I personally wouldn't shave my head
I don't see how that helps support a person going through cancer. If anything
it makes the other person miserable too.. LOL

And at the risk of upsetting some people... at least for myself, I did not think
that bald was beautiful. It was convenient I admit but beautiful, no.

I would support a cancer patient by offering to clean their house, run errands,
cook for them. You know the daily stuff that really matters.

Hugs,
Ayse

Rague

aysemari said:

I personally wouldn't shave my head
I don't see how that helps support a person going through cancer. If anything
it makes the other person miserable too.. LOL

And at the risk of upsetting some people... at least for myself, I did not think
that bald was beautiful. It was convenient I admit but beautiful, no.

I would support a cancer patient by offering to clean their house, run errands,
cook for them. You know the daily stuff that really matters.

Hugs,
Ayse

Different opinions are why I
Different opinions are why I asked. There are so MANY different way that we all think and what will support others.

Granted the young men who shaved their heads when mine was were men but it made me feel good that they were thinking about me and to me it was a show of support/care. Over the years (before I had BC), I had heard of many groups supporting cancer patients this way. There are certainly many other way to support/give to those in need. Years ago, a very dear friend was going through some really hard times - I got her Hubby to give me the key to their house and while they were with family in another state over Christmas, I went to her house and totally cleaned it (as in a 'spring cleaning') so that when they came home she walked into a totally clean house. This past summer, I gave daily ride to Rads for someone who needed them.

If I thought that it would help someone fell better, yes I would shave my head again. That's just me - not what is right for anyone else.

Susan

sbmly53

I would do just about anything to support a loved one
with cancer, but I wouldn't shave my head. I know that others wouldn't even blink an eye when asked, but I know I would be unable to do it. If it were long enough, I would consider a cut for Locks of Love.

Sue

carkris

sbmly53 said:

I would do just about anything to support a loved one
with cancer, but I wouldn't shave my head. I know that others wouldn't even blink an eye when asked, but I know I would be unable to do it. If it were long enough, I would consider a cut for Locks of Love.

Sue

no I would not shave my head
no I would not shave my head unless asked to. but I would also do anything for anyone. My husband wanted to shave his head for me, but we all begged him not to as he has a very large head .LOL

Rague

carkris said:

no I would not shave my head
no I would not shave my head unless asked to. but I would also do anything for anyone. My husband wanted to shave his head for me, but we all begged him not to as he has a very large head .LOL

Well when I lost my hair,
Well when I lost my hair, Sandy (Hubby) never said anything about 'shaving' his head but then it wouldn't have made any real difference with looking at him - he's quite bald (has been for years LOL) plus he's retired Navy so very short hair (what he still has) is norm for him. (Another funny - he has a 'pin head' wears a smaller hat than I do.)

Susan

CypressCynthia

If a loved one asked me I
If a loved one asked me I would do it, but, having lost all of my hair once, I'm not in a rush to lose it again.

fauxma

CypressCynthia said:

If a loved one asked me I
If a loved one asked me I would do it, but, having lost all of my hair once, I'm not in a rush to lose it again.

I am going to answer this in
I am going to answer this in reverse. If I had a friend or group that wanted to shave their head in support of me if I had to do chemo I would tell them no. I would be so upset and miserable if someone did that. Now cutting hair shorter to donate to locks of love would be fine. I had a neighbor when her sister had to do chemo that asked if I thought it would be supportive to her sister to shave her head. I told her that I thought cleaning, shopping, visiting, and being there was the best way. But I can see where some people might find this supportive just not me. And I think that there is a big difference in a man shaving his head and a woman. A woman's hair is a very big part of our feminine mystic. Whether we keep it short or long, it does define who we are. There are only a few brave souls who go against the grain and wear their hair shaved by choice. My daughter had a friend in college who shaved her head. She went from long, crazy curls to smooth as a pool ball and she was absolutely beautiful both ways.
So my answer is if someone asked me if they should shave their head in support of me I would say a Big No. I would like to think that if I was asked to do this to support someone else that I would but I am not so sure. I didn't do chemo but when it was considered I was not the least bit concerned about lossing my hair but to just shave it, I don't know. Hopefully I will never have to face either possibility.
Good subject and yes, there is no right or wrong just different reactions and thought.
Stef

jessiesmom1

Would you shave your head?
Hi Susan,

Your post really made me think, and I thank you for that. After having lost all of my hair everywhere including eyebrows and eyelashes I just do not think I could voluntarily shave off my hair again - even to support a fellow Pink Sister. While I had MANY side effects from chemo, the single worst one to me was the loss of my hair. It was the one thing that made it obvious to me and the rest of the world that I had cancer. I would take care of your kids, drive you to the doctor, clean your house, cook your meals, take your phone call at 3a.m. but the hair thing is just too much.

IRENE

mrs gadget

jessiesmom1 said:

Would you shave your head?
Hi Susan,

Your post really made me think, and I thank you for that. After having lost all of my hair everywhere including eyebrows and eyelashes I just do not think I could voluntarily shave off my hair again - even to support a fellow Pink Sister. While I had MANY side effects from chemo, the single worst one to me was the loss of my hair. It was the one thing that made it obvious to me and the rest of the world that I had cancer. I would take care of your kids, drive you to the doctor, clean your house, cook your meals, take your phone call at 3a.m. but the hair thing is just too much.

IRENE

this makes me giggle and reflect at the same time...
My husband finished his stem cell transplant treatment right around the time I was diagnosed with BC...to say the least, his hair was just starting to come back as mine was starting to fall out!! For a short time, we were truly the bald couple so there wasn't a choice in the head shaving. I have to admit we looked pretty funny and were truly each other's best friend during our treatments...

Rague

fauxma said:

I am going to answer this in
I am going to answer this in reverse. If I had a friend or group that wanted to shave their head in support of me if I had to do chemo I would tell them no. I would be so upset and miserable if someone did that. Now cutting hair shorter to donate to locks of love would be fine. I had a neighbor when her sister had to do chemo that asked if I thought it would be supportive to her sister to shave her head. I told her that I thought cleaning, shopping, visiting, and being there was the best way. But I can see where some people might find this supportive just not me. And I think that there is a big difference in a man shaving his head and a woman. A woman's hair is a very big part of our feminine mystic. Whether we keep it short or long, it does define who we are. There are only a few brave souls who go against the grain and wear their hair shaved by choice. My daughter had a friend in college who shaved her head. She went from long, crazy curls to smooth as a pool ball and she was absolutely beautiful both ways.
So my answer is if someone asked me if they should shave their head in support of me I would say a Big No. I would like to think that if I was asked to do this to support someone else that I would but I am not so sure. I didn't do chemo but when it was considered I was not the least bit concerned about lossing my hair but to just shave it, I don't know. Hopefully I will never have to face either possibility.
Good subject and yes, there is no right or wrong just different reactions and thought.
Stef

There is not right/wrong - just thoughts
I was 'sans hair' for 8 months so to me it wouldn't be that hard to do it again. I didn't go without my scarfs, stocking caps or wigs during that time - it was FRIGID to put it mildly and I liked to not FREEZE.

Rague

mrs gadget said:

this makes me giggle and reflect at the same time...
My husband finished his stem cell transplant treatment right around the time I was diagnosed with BC...to say the least, his hair was just starting to come back as mine was starting to fall out!! For a short time, we were truly the bald couple so there wasn't a choice in the head shaving. I have to admit we looked pretty funny and were truly each other's best friend during our treatments...

As I said before, Sandy is
As I said before, Sandy is quite bald (has been for years), he teased me all the time while I was sans hair (AKA totally BALD) the he finally had more hair than I had. My comeback was always the same - "But mine will grow back - yours won't!" Which it did!

Susan

LadyParvati

Yes, especially if it would raise money for cancer research or
Yes, especially if it would raise money for cancer research or make her (or him) feel less alone on the treatment journey. What's the big deal? I went through it once, and it grows back pretty quickly.

Just MY opinion, though!

Hugs, Sandy

chenheart

I am in Ayse's court on
I am in Ayse's court on this one. Reggie has beautiful, thick, long hair and he wanted to shave it in support of me when I did chemo the first time. I was adamant that he NOT do that! For one, I love touching his hair; it gave me comfort, and two, losing my hair was not a choice for me, but would have been for him. It seemed completely an apples/oranges type situation to me.

The times I can see it, though,is when a school-age child is going through chemo and has to go to school bald. That time of life, as opposed to mine is so full of fear and peer pressure~ if most of the kids in the class looked like the "chemo-kid", I think the emotional playing field would be leveled, and a lot of childen, and perhaps adults alike could learn a valuable life lesson.

I have seen plenty of young adults at the Relay For Life having their long ponytails lopped off to donate to Locks Of Love, and I think that is wonderful! No head shaving necessary, just a short, kicky hair style, and a loving donation made.

You are right. there is absolutly no right or wrong on this one~thanks for the interesting post!

Hugs,
Chen♥

Double Whammy

chenheart said:

I am in Ayse's court on
I am in Ayse's court on this one. Reggie has beautiful, thick, long hair and he wanted to shave it in support of me when I did chemo the first time. I was adamant that he NOT do that! For one, I love touching his hair; it gave me comfort, and two, losing my hair was not a choice for me, but would have been for him. It seemed completely an apples/oranges type situation to me.

The times I can see it, though,is when a school-age child is going through chemo and has to go to school bald. That time of life, as opposed to mine is so full of fear and peer pressure~ if most of the kids in the class looked like the "chemo-kid", I think the emotional playing field would be leveled, and a lot of childen, and perhaps adults alike could learn a valuable life lesson.

I have seen plenty of young adults at the Relay For Life having their long ponytails lopped off to donate to Locks Of Love, and I think that is wonderful! No head shaving necessary, just a short, kicky hair style, and a loving donation made.

You are right. there is absolutly no right or wrong on this one~thanks for the interesting post!

Hugs,
Chen♥

Absolutely not!
I don't understand why anyone would want to call attention to themselves by shaving their head "in support" of a friend going through chemo. Seems like they're saying "look at me, I have a friend going through chemo and I did this, aren't I wonderful?" I don't see how someone shaving their hair is of any help to the person going through chemo. Their hair will grow back quickly.

If someone really wanted me to do it and could convince me it would mean so much to them, I probably would. I know some people do this in honor of the chemo patient, I just don't understand it. I don't think they're wrong for doing it, not at all, just don't understand. Did anyone experience this "tribute" to them losing their hair? How did it make you feel?

Suzanne

disneyfan2008

friend of mine
family member going to lose her hair..so they had HAIR SHAVING party...(for real) the whole family participated!

joannstar

No
I don't see how that is supportive to another person. I would take them shopping for headcoverings and cook food or just be there. My hair is just coming in and I've uncovered it this week--can't image how my having my head shaved would help someone else. If anyone had asked me, I would not had let them--no need for 2 people to be bald, it was bad enough for just me.

JoAnn

weazer

joannstar said:

No
I don't see how that is supportive to another person. I would take them shopping for headcoverings and cook food or just be there. My hair is just coming in and I've uncovered it this week--can't image how my having my head shaved would help someone else. If anyone had asked me, I would not had let them--no need for 2 people to be bald, it was bad enough for just me.

JoAnn

I would
My sister did, when my hair started to fall out!
I was'nt aware of it until she told me.
I live in Colorado and she lives in Montana, and it was winter when she did it.
Brrrrrrrr, the winters there are very cold.
And a coworker of hers, they worked at a bar there and raised money and more attention to Breast cancer and many other cancers.
So yes I would : )

disneyfan2008

weazer said:

I would
My sister did, when my hair started to fall out!
I was'nt aware of it until she told me.
I live in Colorado and she lives in Montana, and it was winter when she did it.
Brrrrrrrr, the winters there are very cold.
And a coworker of hers, they worked at a bar there and raised money and more attention to Breast cancer and many other cancers.
So yes I would : )

weazer@ very nice story
so nice raised money as well...

ElizabethB

must be love
I had cut my hair and donated to locks of love. because I wanted to control this beast. I have two girls they have long hair. The next day they went down and had there hair cut for locks of love . I felt good that they thought so much of me to share.....when I first found out that I had cancer my two girls had a tattoo of a pink ribbon put on there wrist so that every time they see it they would think of me and say a prayer....My oldest does tattoos and she is very motivated. now because she donates 1/2 of what she gets for the tattoo pink ribbon to the .ACS so sweet and wonderful such a positive thing coming from my girls love you all you are all in my prayers

disneyfan2008

ElizabethB said:

must be love
I had cut my hair and donated to locks of love. because I wanted to control this beast. I have two girls they have long hair. The next day they went down and had there hair cut for locks of love . I felt good that they thought so much of me to share.....when I first found out that I had cancer my two girls had a tattoo of a pink ribbon put on there wrist so that every time they see it they would think of me and say a prayer....My oldest does tattoos and she is very motivated. now because she donates 1/2 of what she gets for the tattoo pink ribbon to the .ACS so sweet and wonderful such a positive thing coming from my girls love you all you are all in my prayers

great you donated hair
That is great....! EVEN if I could My hair has been dyed so many times I wouldnt' be able to!

Also NICE on Tatto donation!