I admire my 8 yr old son/follow up appt with GI dr today

bspangler47

Earlier this afternoon I had a follow up appt with my GI dr. The visit went very well. Since my GI dr was not in town last year when the colorectal surgeron performed my last surgery he is going to call him so he can let me know how much colon I have left etc. I have to call him on Tuesday so he can let me know when I will have to go in for my yearly colonscopy. That I am not even looking forward to. Even thinking I might not the scope done again. I feel the last few years my body has been put thru so much.


I was feeling pretty good tonight until I started helping my 8 yr old with his homework. The reason why was because since I had the last surgery in March 2010. I have been having issues with bowel movements, not able to control them. I started to wear diapers in Jan 2009 when the reversal was done and I was "hooked" back up, so to speak. After that surgery and various ER visits, I was having a hard time keeping anything down. Started to lose weight. So the colorectal surgeron talked to me about another surgery in order to keep what I ate and drank down. I agreed to get the surgery. Felt I didnt have any other choice. Which I cant remember the name of the surgery. All I know is whatever I eat or drink it really goes thru my system so I have to be careful. I guess I ate something that didnt agree with me because it wasnt long I was in the restroom for while. Since this happened tonight, my son came into the restroom with me in order for him to complete his school work. I felt horrible. I am glad I have him seeing a counselor and hopeing in the future we will be seeing a counselor together. Currently its just my son and I at home, I am a single parent. My older children are here but they were working etc.

jararno

Thinking of you!
Hi Barbara,

Wow....you have been through so much! Sounds like your son is handling things pretty well. Glad he has someone to talk to about what all of you are going through. (My children are grown and in their late 20's so my experience with colon cancer has been much easier.)

It sounds like you are very open and honest with your kids about your medical issues. This is so important...so many people try to shelter the children from the reality instead of including them in the care process.

Kids and homework.....I do not miss that part at all! You mentioned being Military? My son has recently become a Coast Guard Officer ( went to OCS after college ) We are totally new to the military, but the medical seems pretty good? My brother is in a VA Hospital receiving Chemotherapy for a very rare cancer. He is being treated very well and seems to have great access to the doctors and medical staff.

Hope that you are feeling better with each day. Wish I could help you gain some weight!
( I actually gained weight after the chemo! Not cool as I am quite heavy. ) I also have the trots all the time, but I still seem to gain weight!

Sending positive thoughts your way!

Take Care,

Barb

tootsie1

Sorry
I'm sorry you've had such a hard time. I hope the GI will be able to offer up a plan that will help ease this up for you.

*hugs*
Gail

kluong

tootsie1 said:

Sorry
I'm sorry you've had such a hard time. I hope the GI will be able to offer up a plan that will help ease this up for you.

*hugs*
Gail

We have an 8 year old too
I admired you for putting your son into counseloring. Lots of people told me to put our son into it as well. However, my son said that he did not want to go. I think he does not want to talk about it. We have been dealing with this for 1 1/2 years. We have been to the hospital at least 10 months out of a year. My hubby is very sick so my son knows and see everything. He has made many comments and asked lots of questions. However, I have not addressed them the way I should. We also have a 7 mos old baby so I am trying to keep our family as normal as possible. Please send me an email at hluong9043@yahoo.com anytime you want to talk about your son or anything on your mind. You are not alone.

Kim L.

bspangler47

jararno said:

Thinking of you!
Hi Barbara,

Wow....you have been through so much! Sounds like your son is handling things pretty well. Glad he has someone to talk to about what all of you are going through. (My children are grown and in their late 20's so my experience with colon cancer has been much easier.)

It sounds like you are very open and honest with your kids about your medical issues. This is so important...so many people try to shelter the children from the reality instead of including them in the care process.

Kids and homework.....I do not miss that part at all! You mentioned being Military? My son has recently become a Coast Guard Officer ( went to OCS after college ) We are totally new to the military, but the medical seems pretty good? My brother is in a VA Hospital receiving Chemotherapy for a very rare cancer. He is being treated very well and seems to have great access to the doctors and medical staff.

Hope that you are feeling better with each day. Wish I could help you gain some weight!
( I actually gained weight after the chemo! Not cool as I am quite heavy. ) I also have the trots all the time, but I still seem to gain weight!

Sending positive thoughts your way!

Take Care,

Barb

The Military is pretty good
The Military is pretty good with medical. It is like the civilain world. Sometimes you can get good drs and sometimes you cant. The GI dr will help with the colonscopy. There isnt much they can do with the loose stools. I have Lomitol and Immudium(sp) in order to stop them. I am starting to feel better am to go places (walmart, movies etc) just have to take my "diaper" bag. I have now started to take vitamins that the pharamisct (sp) that worked on the oncology floor gave me. i am glad that he talks to his counsleor. Because he might open up more with her then me. I have a 11 yr old that I sent to her Dads in Southern California, she will be back at the end of the summer. She was having a hard time in school etc. I was effecting her alittle more she acted out alot. Thank you for the positvie thoughts I appreciate them.

Take Care, Barbara

bspangler47

kluong said:

We have an 8 year old too
I admired you for putting your son into counseloring. Lots of people told me to put our son into it as well. However, my son said that he did not want to go. I think he does not want to talk about it. We have been dealing with this for 1 1/2 years. We have been to the hospital at least 10 months out of a year. My hubby is very sick so my son knows and see everything. He has made many comments and asked lots of questions. However, I have not addressed them the way I should. We also have a 7 mos old baby so I am trying to keep our family as normal as possible. Please send me an email at hluong9043@yahoo.com anytime you want to talk about your son or anything on your mind. You are not alone.

Kim L.

8 yr old
Hi Kim. I have a total of 5 children. Their ages are 25 (married with 2 small boys), 22, 17, 11, and 8. I was honest with them in the beginning. I answered any questions that had. I felt with me being a single parent and it is just "us", I felt I should tell them. They were going to see everything. I am glad I have been honest with them. All I did with the counseling is made arrangements with the school, and I let it be up to them. When he is ready to talk about it he will let you know. When I was in and out of the hospital from 2009-2010, most of the time he didnt want to come to the hospital. He would tell my older son, "I will surpise Mom when she comes home. My daughter the 11 yr old would come. And I would call them everynight I was in the hospital. I agree with you to keep your family normal as much as possible. Here is my email address: spangler_barbara@hotmail.com, in case you would also let to talk about things.

Barbara

pete43lost_at_sea

bspangler47 said:

8 yr old
Hi Kim. I have a total of 5 children. Their ages are 25 (married with 2 small boys), 22, 17, 11, and 8. I was honest with them in the beginning. I answered any questions that had. I felt with me being a single parent and it is just "us", I felt I should tell them. They were going to see everything. I am glad I have been honest with them. All I did with the counseling is made arrangements with the school, and I let it be up to them. When he is ready to talk about it he will let you know. When I was in and out of the hospital from 2009-2010, most of the time he didnt want to come to the hospital. He would tell my older son, "I will surpise Mom when she comes home. My daughter the 11 yr old would come. And I would call them everynight I was in the hospital. I agree with you to keep your family normal as much as possible. Here is my email address: spangler_barbara@hotmail.com, in case you would also let to talk about things.

Barbara

hi barb and kim, i have a 5 yr boy and 9 yr old girl
i know we have kids and bowel cancer in common, but i just laugh a little when i heard you say try to keep things as normal as possible.

of course i know what you mean, but the life we a leaving is so far from normal. today my wife worked all day, i slept till 1pm and the kids just relaxed and watched tv.

when i walked out of the bedroom to the lounge room, they had guilty looks on their faces and some chocolate.

then i noticed the cookies and cream icecream was what they decided to have for lunch.

i guess that pretty normal.

i get on really well with the kids school principal and i am going to ask her if she has any counselling options for the kids, you know just a little something that may help them, even though we talk heaps. i know it would be different with a counsellor.

heres hoping our kids and ourselves make it through this journey in the best possible shape.

pete

bspangler47

pete43lost_at_sea said:

hi barb and kim, i have a 5 yr boy and 9 yr old girl
i know we have kids and bowel cancer in common, but i just laugh a little when i heard you say try to keep things as normal as possible.

of course i know what you mean, but the life we a leaving is so far from normal. today my wife worked all day, i slept till 1pm and the kids just relaxed and watched tv.

when i walked out of the bedroom to the lounge room, they had guilty looks on their faces and some chocolate.

then i noticed the cookies and cream icecream was what they decided to have for lunch.

i guess that pretty normal.

i get on really well with the kids school principal and i am going to ask her if she has any counselling options for the kids, you know just a little something that may help them, even though we talk heaps. i know it would be different with a counsellor.

heres hoping our kids and ourselves make it through this journey in the best possible shape.

pete

Kids
Hey Pete,

I had to laugh when I seen what your children ate. LOL Yep that is normal. Mine would do it to. You also might want to look in your area for counseling that deals with cancer. Or even ask the American Cancer society.

I thought I was going to go run errands and check out the house I am trying to buy. But realized I am tired. So going to stay home and rest.

There are times I feel bad that I cant take my kids places. I hope I am better this summer would like to take a trip to california for disneyland.

Barbara

pete43lost_at_sea

bspangler47 said:

Kids
Hey Pete,

I had to laugh when I seen what your children ate. LOL Yep that is normal. Mine would do it to. You also might want to look in your area for counseling that deals with cancer. Or even ask the American Cancer society.

I thought I was going to go run errands and check out the house I am trying to buy. But realized I am tired. So going to stay home and rest.

There are times I feel bad that I cant take my kids places. I hope I am better this summer would like to take a trip to california for disneyland.

Barbara

its along way to america i am in sydney australia
hi barbara

would love to do disneyland with family one day soon after chemo.

bit of a trip for us though.

resting is good if you body needs it you have to listen.

sometimes i try to do too much, but i try to take it easy.

pete

kluong

bspangler47 said:

Kids
Hey Pete,

I had to laugh when I seen what your children ate. LOL Yep that is normal. Mine would do it to. You also might want to look in your area for counseling that deals with cancer. Or even ask the American Cancer society.

I thought I was going to go run errands and check out the house I am trying to buy. But realized I am tired. So going to stay home and rest.

There are times I feel bad that I cant take my kids places. I hope I am better this summer would like to take a trip to california for disneyland.

Barbara

Bab and Pet
Disneyland is a great place for kids and adults. I hope you guys get to go this summer.

Our son spends alot of time watching tv and playing computers too. I feel really bad that we can't do much with him now. He was mad at us over the weekend because we would not let him invite his friends to the house. He has a b-day coming up and we told him no party and he was really upset. It just feels like it doesn't how hard you tried with your kids, you will always fail.

We spend so much time at the hospital that the social worker at the hospital has tried several times to talk to my son. My son isn't interested so I will let him tell me when he is ready to talk.

My son has been to the hospital so many times that now when he goes, he will draw a sad face on the board that is in the room for nurses/doctors to use. We even spent a couple nights in the ER room. These are the experiences that we want to shed our children from but unfortunately, life has a funny way of making us do things we don't want to do.

Kim

pete43lost_at_sea

kluong said:

Bab and Pet
Disneyland is a great place for kids and adults. I hope you guys get to go this summer.

Our son spends alot of time watching tv and playing computers too. I feel really bad that we can't do much with him now. He was mad at us over the weekend because we would not let him invite his friends to the house. He has a b-day coming up and we told him no party and he was really upset. It just feels like it doesn't how hard you tried with your kids, you will always fail.

We spend so much time at the hospital that the social worker at the hospital has tried several times to talk to my son. My son isn't interested so I will let him tell me when he is ready to talk.

My son has been to the hospital so many times that now when he goes, he will draw a sad face on the board that is in the room for nurses/doctors to use. We even spent a couple nights in the ER room. These are the experiences that we want to shed our children from but unfortunately, life has a funny way of making us do things we don't want to do.

Kim

i spoil them when i can
hi kim,
i was a little sad to hear about your son b party, never mind, sometimes they have to learn
to sacrifice. many kids do. alot of kids are spoilt, too often.

by looking after ourselves i think we teach them ironiocally how to love and care for yourself.

dare i say it, "possibly one one the most importasnt lessons of life", actively being demonstrated by their parents. it sounds like you are a great role model.

now i have one idea based on what my friends did for me, i was to till to do my sons party , so my friends did it for me, my son was thrilled. the party happened a couple of days after i got out of hospital. if you got some friends who offered favours now could be a good time to see if they could help. birthdays are special for young kids, my son loved his party.

pete