The Reading Room: "Grief, Unedited" from NY Times

Hatshepsut

This article about grief appeared in a recent edition of the NY Times. I thought it was interesting and decided to pass it along. I think it is pretty wonderful if fifty percent of the people who lose a spouse are able to resume their lives within six months. Alas, I'm in the group of "slow learners."

Hatshepsut

NY Times "Grief, Unedited"

grandmafay

Acute
I think the operative word here is "acute" grief. Yes, I think most of us do find ways to move forward. I don't think we get over our losses within 6 months, though. As far as dating, etc., I have a number of older widows in our church that would refute that. But maybe we are all slow learners. Fay

luz del lago

grandmafay said:

Acute
I think the operative word here is "acute" grief. Yes, I think most of us do find ways to move forward. I don't think we get over our losses within 6 months, though. As far as dating, etc., I have a number of older widows in our church that would refute that. But maybe we are all slow learners. Fay

Interesting reading
Thank you for posting this article. Having lost my love of my life, husband of almost 30 yrs, I truly hope that I may be one of those that after 6 months, I may be able to get back to a life. A new life, I just don't see "resuming" my life, as we were so close that it is painful to think of doing the things that were our dreams without him!

I have begun to think, search and listen to my inner self, to see if there are things out there in the world that I may want to see, hear, taste, visit that are purely from a new desire. I adored my husband, and I will never forget everything I can possibly remember about him, but something inside me tells me that the memories are beautiful to hold in my heart, but I will have to get out there and make some more memories, new memories. If I try to live in those memories I will miss the rest of what could be a good life.

Still, easier said than done! But I know I must try.

Lucy

Beckymarie

grandmafay said:

Acute
I think the operative word here is "acute" grief. Yes, I think most of us do find ways to move forward. I don't think we get over our losses within 6 months, though. As far as dating, etc., I have a number of older widows in our church that would refute that. But maybe we are all slow learners. Fay

I agree that we need to
I agree that we need to define "acute" grief. I actually found the six month makr very difficult and had a setback around that time. Now at 8 months better but still hurting. Grieving is a very personal journey and I think very different for each individual. Dating? Can't even entertain the thought and don't see it in my futrue, but to each their own.
Becky

Hatshepsut

Update on NY Times Piece: "Grief, Unedited"
UPDATE:

For those who might be interested, here are the letters to the editor that the NY Times printed in response to the article " Grief Unedited." There are some interesting points of view expressed:

NY Times Letters to the Editor RE: "Grief Unedited"

Hatshepsut