Hi everyone!!!

jo jo
jo jo Member Posts: 1,175
in Breast Cancer #1
I know its been awhile since ive posted but its been a little rough for me lately.
I believe over the past few months i have been slipping in and out of a depression and DUH it just took me awhile to realize it. I wouldnt go any where, do anything, talk to anyone for weeks at a time. Then id get out a few times in between then right back into my slump again and each time it got worse. I still dont know why...but its been going on since Sept about the time my sis Stacy passed away but i dont know if thats the whole reason for this...i dont know im still confused. But now that i know that im depressed i think i can work on it from here and try and get right again and sometimes when your depressed you have bad thoughts, not sayin you always act on them but those thoughts are there.
Thanks for letting me vent....I miss you guys!!!

Comments

  • KathiM
    KathiM Member Posts: 8,028 Member
    #2
    In my bestest concerned mom voice!!!!
    I was so worried about you, dearheart!!!!

    Depression is a sneaky thing...I fell into the trap recently, as well. The hardest part for me, too, was figuring out what was wrong. Once I did, I had something to work on, and before I knew it, I had it under control!

    We have missed you, too!!!

    Hugs, Kathi
  • Dawne.Hope
    Dawne.Hope Member Posts: 823
    #3
    missed you!
    Dearest jojo,

    Thanks for checking in!

    Please see someone about the depression. You've been through so much and just the breast cancer alone, the treatment and the aftermath of all of that throws many of us into depression ... add the tragic death of your sister ... it's so much!

    Anti-depressants can really help! PLEEEEEASE see someone! We love you, we miss you, you have so much to offer!

    You're not alone in the depression, either! We're here for you.

    Much, much love to you! [[[[[[[jojo]]]]]]]] xo
  • Hippiechick58
    Hippiechick58 Member Posts: 320
    #4
    As someone who has suffered
    As someone who has suffered from depression most of her adult life, I can strongly relate. You don't intend to think "bad" thoughts, they are just there. I've been on every anti-depressant known to man (right now stable on cymbalta for about 3 years) I'm not saying you need medication, just saying what works for me. I also go to therapy (individual and group) My group is fantastic! It is a women's interpersonal group and we are all supportive and caring of one another(kinda like the women here!)

    You say that the depression began when your sister passed(sorry for your loss :() That is a significant and traumatic event. The effects can be felt immediately, or delayed (repressed) for years. It makes sense that you would feel the way you do, given the circumstances. Give yourself time to grieve. You have experienced a huge loss!

    If you find that you are thinking about harming yourself, you should call your Dr. immediately. If it is after hours, you should go straight to the ER!

    I wish you courage, strength and hope. Take good care.

    "May you be at Peace; May you be free of Suffering."
    Dianne
  • dyaneb123
    dyaneb123 Member Posts: 950
    #5
    Hippiechick58 said:

    As someone who has suffered
    As someone who has suffered from depression most of her adult life, I can strongly relate. You don't intend to think "bad" thoughts, they are just there. I've been on every anti-depressant known to man (right now stable on cymbalta for about 3 years) I'm not saying you need medication, just saying what works for me. I also go to therapy (individual and group) My group is fantastic! It is a women's interpersonal group and we are all supportive and caring of one another(kinda like the women here!)

    You say that the depression began when your sister passed(sorry for your loss :() That is a significant and traumatic event. The effects can be felt immediately, or delayed (repressed) for years. It makes sense that you would feel the way you do, given the circumstances. Give yourself time to grieve. You have experienced a huge loss!

    If you find that you are thinking about harming yourself, you should call your Dr. immediately. If it is after hours, you should go straight to the ER!

    I wish you courage, strength and hope. Take good care.

    "May you be at Peace; May you be free of Suffering."
    Dianne

    JoJo it's very common post
    JoJo it's very common post BC dx to experience depression. I think you'll find that a lot of us are taking meds. to get us through these dark times. I'm taking effexor, which helps me stay on an even keel. I'm still not very social, but I never have been, lol! So don't beat yourself up over something that is a natural reaction to the stress and anxiety you've been under. Just ask your Onc. for something to help you.
    Dee
  • tgf
    tgf Member Posts: 950 Member
    #6
    dyaneb123 said:

    JoJo it's very common post
    JoJo it's very common post BC dx to experience depression. I think you'll find that a lot of us are taking meds. to get us through these dark times. I'm taking effexor, which helps me stay on an even keel. I'm still not very social, but I never have been, lol! So don't beat yourself up over something that is a natural reaction to the stress and anxiety you've been under. Just ask your Onc. for something to help you.
    Dee

    drugs
    Depression is terrible. Depression is not just sadness, or worry, or feelings of emptiness. People with true depression know it is really a big black hole and you see no way out. But there is a way out ... and that's drugs... and possibly counseling/therapy. For me drugs have truly been a life-saver for me ... for many, many years... long before I was diagnosed with BC. I've been on anti-depressants for over 30 years ... and without them ... I honestly don't think I would be here today. Over these many years I've been on various medications ... and right now it's effexor (since I'm on tamoxifen ... and effexor is one of the few anti-depressants that is OK to take with tamoxifen). It's working fine. So ... if you aren't already taking medication for depression ... go to your doctor/oncologist and explain your feelings and that you need something to help you cope. If you are already on medication for depression ... again ... talk to your doctor/oncologist and explain that what you are taking now is no longer working ... and could they prescribe another drug. If you have to try several drugs ... do it ... but there has to be something out there that will help you cope. I know many of us understand your feelings ... but we also know you can get through it ... with a little help from the chemical manufacturing folks.


    Hang in there ... and let us know how you are doing.

    love,
    teena
  • disneyfan2008
    disneyfan2008 Member Posts: 6,583 Member
    #7
    vent away
    GOOD to see you back on....good thoughts heading your way
  • MyTurnNow
    MyTurnNow Member Posts: 2,686 Member
    #8
    JoJo, we have missed YOU!!
    Thanks for dropping in and letting us know how you are doing. Like everyone else has said, you have been through a lot dealing with the breast cancer and death of your "sister". We care about you and worry when there is no news from you. Take it one day at a time and I am sending (((hugs))) and love your way.
  • CR1954
    CR1954 Member Posts: 1,390 Member
    #9
    jo jo......
    I kmow everyone here is very happy and relieved to hear from you. We care deeply about how you are feeling and it's quite alright that you vent.

    You have been through numerous traumas and all in a relatively short period of time. My condolences on the loss of your sister. And as far as the BC, well, we all know the emotional and physical toll that it takes.

    Like many, I take anti-depressants and also anti-anxiety. It's my opinion that you should take help where you can get it. There is no shame in taking meds or seeking therapy. Or venting on here. Sometimes just talking lifts spirits. Whatever it takes to help you feel better is just fine.

    Hugs,
    CR
  • Cinkal
    Cinkal Member Posts: 161
    #10
    Sorry to hear of your
    Sorry to hear of your depression. I am new to all of this, so I have no experience with depression. So far, I have been fortunate enough to have friends and family that keep me busy and my mind off of the cancer.
    i hope you feel better soon! Positive thoughts heading your way.
  • Boppy_of_6
    Boppy_of_6 Member Posts: 1,138
    #11
    Cinkal said:

    Sorry to hear of your
    Sorry to hear of your depression. I am new to all of this, so I have no experience with depression. So far, I have been fortunate enough to have friends and family that keep me busy and my mind off of the cancer.
    i hope you feel better soon! Positive thoughts heading your way.

    So sorry
    I am so sorry to hear all you are going through but I am glad to hear from you. I had problems with depression when my Dad died. It was a terrible time for me. I will be praying for you. God Bless
    (((Hugs))) Janice
  • missrenee
    missrenee Member Posts: 2,136 Member
    #12
    Boppy_of_6 said:

    So sorry
    I am so sorry to hear all you are going through but I am glad to hear from you. I had problems with depression when my Dad died. It was a terrible time for me. I will be praying for you. God Bless
    (((Hugs))) Janice

    JoJo--so glad to hear from you, but
    so sad you're having a tough time of it. Like all the others above have said--if you haven't already, please see someone. I've been on that ride as well--am still in therapy and taking an antidepressant. It has helped tremendously. It's next to impossible to climb out of the black hole on your own. We all love and care about you. Please keep us informed.

    Hugs, Renee
  • Bella Luna
    Bella Luna Member Posts: 1,578 Member
    #13
    JoJo... it is so good to
    JoJo... it is so good to hear from you. You were missed on the boards. It's been a rough roller coaster ride for you and I am sorry to hear about the bout with depression. I am glad that you know what it is and are working on getting the better of it.
    Hugs and prayers to you dear Sister.
    BL
  • natly15
    natly15 Member Posts: 1,941
    #14
    Bella Luna said:

    JoJo... it is so good to
    JoJo... it is so good to hear from you. You were missed on the boards. It's been a rough roller coaster ride for you and I am sorry to hear about the bout with depression. I am glad that you know what it is and are working on getting the better of it.
    Hugs and prayers to you dear Sister.
    BL

    JoJo thank you for posting.
    JoJo thank you for posting. As alone and isolated that you may feel, you can see from all the comments that we do understand and many of us have experienced it. If you find that you cant shake it on your own, as mentioned there are meds and there is therapy. Depression is an ailment just like any other ailment. There are meds for diabetes, high blood pressure, heart disease, etc, and there are meds for depression. Happy to hear from you.
  • lynn1950
    lynn1950 Member Posts: 2,570
    #15
    Depression wreaks havoc on
    Depression wreaks havoc on us; I know, I'm a depression survivor. You've been through so much. As many have mentioned, there's help out there - don't be afraid to seek it. It does get better with help. xoxoxoxo Lynn
  • VickiSam
    VickiSam Member Posts: 9,079 Member
    #16
    lynn1950 said:

    Depression wreaks havoc on
    Depression wreaks havoc on us; I know, I'm a depression survivor. You've been through so much. As many have mentioned, there's help out there - don't be afraid to seek it. It does get better with help. xoxoxoxo Lynn

    Hello and Howdy, Misty Jo .. It is so nice to hear from
    you. I am glad that you recognize that you may need help dealing with all you have lost .. cousin/sister, shoulder movement and strength .. not to mention, loss of naivety due to Breast Cancer and chemo therapy. Our world, has forever changed and we must change with it . . . never grieving for life we knew and appreciated, before breast cancer.

    You are strong, and powerful .. Please don't anything, object, disease or person = take that away from you!

    Strength, Courage and Peace,

    Your Twisted Sister in Pink ...

    Vicki Sam
  • cavediver
    cavediver Member Posts: 607
    #17
    so glad to hear from
    so glad to hear from you.....we were all worried about you. Sorry you have been having such a rough time of late...but you must feel all our hugs and positive thoughts lifting you now. I am just now realizing it is never over.... please seak help if you need it... none of us can do this on our own. Again, we missed you and send you hugs and love
  • ms.sunshine
    ms.sunshine Member Posts: 707 Member
    #18
    cavediver said:

    so glad to hear from
    so glad to hear from you.....we were all worried about you. Sorry you have been having such a rough time of late...but you must feel all our hugs and positive thoughts lifting you now. I am just now realizing it is never over.... please seak help if you need it... none of us can do this on our own. Again, we missed you and send you hugs and love

    JoJo I've missed you, girl
    You know all us Pink Sistas understand first hand about the battle of depression. You fight cancer, come thru, already to move on in your life, then BAM!! Depression hits. Darn when is enough enough.

    Here's what I would say to you if I was next to you, so pretend I am.

    You matter
    You have value
    You are missed when not here
    You are greatly loved

    Take care sweet Jojo, post when you can.
    Jennifer

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