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VA-beekeeper
VA-beekeeper Member Posts: 6
edited March 2014 in Colorectal Cancer #1
My daughter posted a msg on this board last week as I was diagnosed with Stage III colon cancer on 12/30. This started as a large polyp with two biopsies being benign. After surgery was performed on 12/14 a detailed pathology report indicated that one of 13 lymph nodes removed showed signs of cancer. I am no expert in this field, but apparently the "wall" was not broken but the cancer penetrated through. I have lined up two oncologists - see one tomorrow and the other next week. I am very, very scared and have limited knowledge. Lost my husband to lung cancer two years ago, so I am reliving a nightmare, except this time I am wearing the shoes. Any advice, treatment experiences, positive feedback etc. would be greatly appreciated. In reading some of the postings, it appears this group is like family and always there for each other.

Renee
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  • Annabelle41415
    Annabelle41415 Member Posts: 6,742 Member
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    Welcome
    Welcome to the group. We are a great bunch of people that will be here for you through your journey. You need only post a question, thought or concern and someone should post a response shortly even if it's in the middle of the night. There is not a subject that we haven't covered on here since we are a colorectal board so many other problems arise out of this disease. I'm sorry to hear of your husband's passing and now with your diagnosis and you have every right to be scared. You will now be on a rollercoaster of appointments, procedures, thoughts, etc as you move forward on to recovery. Hope that you will post often. We are here if you need us.

    Kim
  • mcgivarenfaith
    mcgivarenfaith Member Posts: 40
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    Hi Renee!
    I am new to this

    Hi Renee!
    I am new to this board too. But it is a wealth of testimonies & success stories i have seen. My husband was DX with colorectal cancer with metastis to his liver in May 2010. We have gotten some great drs & he has had great success so far. Just had liver resection surgery in Dec 2010 to remove several lesions. Wishing you the best in your journey!
  • Lovekitties
    Lovekitties Member Posts: 3,364 Member
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    Hi Renee
    The feelings you have right now are certainly the norm, but you have found a wonderful place and people at this site who will offer all they can to help you on the journey to better health.

    Sounds like you are taking a good approach with having two get-to-know-you appointments with oncs. Having a doctor you feel comfortable with and have faith in is very important.

    By the way, if the VA in your CSN name stands for Virginia...I am from that great state too!

    Keep us posted on things as they move forward. Any question is ok here and lots of shoulders to help with the emotional burdens as well.

    Marie who loves kitties
  • pepebcn
    pepebcn Member Posts: 6,331 Member
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    Hi Renee
    The feelings you have right now are certainly the norm, but you have found a wonderful place and people at this site who will offer all they can to help you on the journey to better health.

    Sounds like you are taking a good approach with having two get-to-know-you appointments with oncs. Having a doctor you feel comfortable with and have faith in is very important.

    By the way, if the VA in your CSN name stands for Virginia...I am from that great state too!

    Keep us posted on things as they move forward. Any question is ok here and lots of shoulders to help with the emotional burdens as well.

    Marie who loves kitties

    Welcome to the board Renee .
    Hugs!
  • Buzzard
    Buzzard Member Posts: 3,043 Member
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    Hi Renee
    The feelings you have right now are certainly the norm, but you have found a wonderful place and people at this site who will offer all they can to help you on the journey to better health.

    Sounds like you are taking a good approach with having two get-to-know-you appointments with oncs. Having a doctor you feel comfortable with and have faith in is very important.

    By the way, if the VA in your CSN name stands for Virginia...I am from that great state too!

    Keep us posted on things as they move forward. Any question is ok here and lots of shoulders to help with the emotional burdens as well.

    Marie who loves kitties

    Beekeeper Huh !
    Then also know that sometimes it takes some smoke to slow us down as well....we may have or had cancer, but it sure isn't gonna slow us down at all...Just let all the smoke clear and you will find that with a little emotional control on your part that this journey will not be near as bad as you have anticipated it would be...It isn't easy but by looking at all of us it is doable, and we are all here as one, to help make each and every journey the easist as it can possibly be for the patient as well as their family and caregivers......Sit back, breathe, and know now that you are in good hands here...and if you have any question at all from poop to peanut butter, just simply ask, someone here has been through it and very soon the most intellectual people on the planet will start bombarding you with their knowledge and before you know it you will be as versed on your disease as your Drs and Nurses...Then you can take total control of your life back, and it starts becoming an easier task than it was before, you actually start making the decisions on what types of treatment you want and you feel good about having the incredible knowledge base to make those decisions. After you have taken control of your life back that a cancer diagnosis can take from you you start to feel actively a part of your health care, and that in itself is a great mental and emotional motivator, which in turn increases physical changes in the body that actually make you smile again...then you finally realize how we can be as upbeat as we are with what we deal with. We celebrate the smallest of victories in this battle because sometimes thats all we get for a long time so we never let one go by without celebration. For the most part, life for all of us is the gift we all cherish, and living it to the fullest by celebrating the most minute' things as a family makes it that much more worth while...
    and 1 more thing..................anyone who hasn't met Kerry S yet, is missing out on lifes greatest adventure in human form.......im sure you will know what I speak of soon...Love, Hope, and Happiness to you.......Buzz
  • Nana2
    Nana2 Member Posts: 255
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    Buzzard said:

    Beekeeper Huh !
    Then also know that sometimes it takes some smoke to slow us down as well....we may have or had cancer, but it sure isn't gonna slow us down at all...Just let all the smoke clear and you will find that with a little emotional control on your part that this journey will not be near as bad as you have anticipated it would be...It isn't easy but by looking at all of us it is doable, and we are all here as one, to help make each and every journey the easist as it can possibly be for the patient as well as their family and caregivers......Sit back, breathe, and know now that you are in good hands here...and if you have any question at all from poop to peanut butter, just simply ask, someone here has been through it and very soon the most intellectual people on the planet will start bombarding you with their knowledge and before you know it you will be as versed on your disease as your Drs and Nurses...Then you can take total control of your life back, and it starts becoming an easier task than it was before, you actually start making the decisions on what types of treatment you want and you feel good about having the incredible knowledge base to make those decisions. After you have taken control of your life back that a cancer diagnosis can take from you you start to feel actively a part of your health care, and that in itself is a great mental and emotional motivator, which in turn increases physical changes in the body that actually make you smile again...then you finally realize how we can be as upbeat as we are with what we deal with. We celebrate the smallest of victories in this battle because sometimes thats all we get for a long time so we never let one go by without celebration. For the most part, life for all of us is the gift we all cherish, and living it to the fullest by celebrating the most minute' things as a family makes it that much more worth while...
    and 1 more thing..................anyone who hasn't met Kerry S yet, is missing out on lifes greatest adventure in human form.......im sure you will know what I speak of soon...Love, Hope, and Happiness to you.......Buzz

    Welcome to the board Renee
    Welcome to the board Renee and to the "family" here. It's true that there is always someone here when you need advise, a shoulder, or in the case of Kerry...a laugh! Seriously, living with cancer in the house (my husband was diagnosed stage IV a little over a year ago) is a scarey thing as you know. (I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your husband.) Coming on here to read or comment day or night makes the battle easier to fight when you sense the incredible army you are in battle with. I can assure you when the dust of the new diagnosis settles and like Buzz says, you become a pretty active part of your health care and decisions, it does get easier.
    We're here for you,
    April
  • CherylHutch
    CherylHutch Member Posts: 1,375 Member
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    Beekeeper in our midst!
    Hey Renee!

    Welcome to the board... I'm very sorry you have to be here, but am so glad you found us right at the beginning of your journey. There is no reason for you to suffer in silence or alone... and let's face it, no matter how many people we have around us willing to help do whatever we need, the bottom line is we are still having to go through the treatments and results with our own fears and feelings. BUT... as you get to know all the characters... oops... people , here on this board, you will realize that not only do you have this huge group of friends you didn't know you had, each and every one of us has been through the same or similar experience as you. Fear? Scared silly? Guess what... each and every one of us has been there, got used to it, then went through it again. It's never ending, but at the same time, you will have nice long breaks where the fear/terrors will leave you.

    I'm so sorry to hear about your husband... the pain of that is still fresh and new in your mind and that's really not what you need to have to keep thinking about as you start your own journey. But keep reminding yourself... every single journey is unique and different... no two journeys are exactly the same. Your husband's journey was one that he was on... yours could (and probably will be) 100% different.

    My advice to you since you are just starting? Go to the store and buy yourself a nice shiny new notebook... pick a colour that is special to you. And at the same time, buy yourself a fancy pen... not just the typical Bic pens where you get 12 to a box (I'm partial to those ones that have the little post-it tabs at the top of them... very handy). Now, this book will be your bible! What you want to do is, when something hits you, or you are suddenly scared because of some thought that has entered your mind ... write it down in the form of a question. You want to write any and all questions that you will come up with (and believe me, you will have a lot of them!). Take that notebook with you to all your different doctors' appointments... and ask them these questions you have written down (leave enough room between questions so you can also write down the answers).

    When you start your treatments, your notebook really comes into play . Some of us, when we started our chemo, no matter what kind you start with, we get what is commonly referred to as Chemo brain ;) Chemo brain is where you feel like your head is in a fog... or, things that you know you should remember, you forget. All the more reason for writing things down... or checking back to see if what you are forgetting is actually something you did know and wrote down :) Have someone go to the first appointments with you. Why? Because our brains can only withhold so much information at a time... and when we are feeling somewhat stressed and overwhelmed, we can withhold even less. So another set of ears is necessary... and it wouldn't hurt of your second pair of ears brought a notebook as well and wrote down some of the things that the doctors are telling you. Then when you are back at home and a bit more relaxed, you can go over what your second pair of ears wrote and you might be very surprised to find you didn't hear half of that ;)

    One thing I can guarantee... once your oncologist gives you the plan of action that he/she is going to put you on... you are going to feel much better. Knowing you have this monster in you is terrifying, not knowing what is going to happen or how you are going to deal with it is terrifying, but having someone say, "Ok, cancer. Right. This is how we attack it...." then you will feel such a sense of relief that there actually is a plan of action and you will have a whole team of doctors and specialists to make sure this plan stays on schedule :)

    Ok... enough babble from the Babble Queen... but suffice it to say, you are going to be alright, and we are going to all be here along with you so you will never be alone :)

    Cheryl
  • christinecarl
    christinecarl Member Posts: 543 Member
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    Welcome
    I am glad you decided to join us. I was diagnosed stage III B on 12-2-08 and I know those first few months are overwhelming and scary. One day you will look back on this and see how far you have come and be amazed. The people here are wondeful and inspiring and will lift you up when you need it. Be sure to keep letting us know how you are doing.
  • LivinginNH
    LivinginNH Member Posts: 1,456 Member
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    Hi Renee,
    Welcome to our


    Hi Renee,

    Welcome to our cyber family dear. You've come to the right place for information, lots of great advice, and most of all, comfort and support. Best wishes and hugs, Cynthia
  • idlehunters
    idlehunters Member Posts: 1,787 Member
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    Hi Renee,
    Welcome to our


    Hi Renee,

    Welcome to our cyber family dear. You've come to the right place for information, lots of great advice, and most of all, comfort and support. Best wishes and hugs, Cynthia

    Hi Renee
    Just wanted to say...welcome...and we are a close family here. Please join us and ask away...cry away...yell away...whatever YOU need to do.... WE ALL HAVE BEEN THERE!!!

    Jennie
  • Patteee
    Patteee Member Posts: 945
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    I know you are scared :(
    its

    I know you are scared :(

    its going to be ok
    you probably will have chemo, it is pretty standard in colon cancer that is showing some lymph node activity
    on the brighter side, you will ge through it and be just fine

    It isn't easy to put the cancer horror behind us, but really, it is what one has to do
    face forward, look forward. Take off bite size chunks every single day and let the rest disappear for another day

    After my surgery, colon resection 2.7 years ago- it was June 14th- my mother driving me home from Mayo in Rochester, MN The visuals were incredible- the rolling, green lush land of south cental Minnesota ahead of me. The car moving forward, time and miles ticking away. It was as though I knew I had to leave the horror behind and move forward as the battle was ahead of me. And you all too well know that horror, we all do Renee, we all do.

    Put one step ahead of you. One at a time. Don't look back and be careful not to go so fast with those steps. Watch a few tv dramas- Desperate Housewives was good for a mental break for me. Take walks, wash your hair, brush your teeth, take another walk. Move forward. First and formost believe you are going to be just FINE. Look in the mirror and tell yourself that, over and ovr and over again.
  • chicoturner
    chicoturner Member Posts: 282
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    Welcome Renee,happy you
    Welcome Renee,happy you found this group. There are days when these are the only people you will talk to that make sense to you! It is a great group. Best to you. Jean
  • AnneCan
    AnneCan Member Posts: 3,673 Member
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    Welcome Renee
    First, I am sorry for the loss of your husband. Second, welcome to this incredible forum. I have found it to be a godsend in my cancer journey.
  • khl8
    khl8 Member Posts: 807
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    AnneCan said:

    Welcome Renee
    First, I am sorry for the loss of your husband. Second, welcome to this incredible forum. I have found it to be a godsend in my cancer journey.

    Welcome
    I mirror what everyone else on the board has said, we are a family and nothing is off limits to talk about. Colorectal cance is not glamourous, in fact you may find when you tell people they may try and not want to talk about it with you. So when to support this is the place to go, we talk about poop and we talk about it quite a bit, and some of us use alot of humor. Some days you can come here and shed a tear from sadness and other times the tears are rollong down your face from laughter! We have all been where you are, some done with treatment, others just beginning, but no matter what stage of treatment we are in there is a wealth of knowledge and support here.
    I am stage 3, out of treatment since 8/09 and so far I am NED.
    So anything you want or need to know, just ask!

    Kathy
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  • Lori-S
    Lori-S Member Posts: 1,277 Member
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    Welcome to the board. We are sorry to hear of your dx but, so happy that you have founbd us. There are many here with lots of experience and support to share. WELCOME
  • just4Brooks
    just4Brooks Member Posts: 980 Member
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    Welcome, Welcome, Welcome
    Sure glade you fund us. I'm a stage 3 colorectal and still kicking (real hard) 1 year after finishing treatment (dec 31 2009). I've had my share of bumbs and pot holes but I couldn't do it without these great people on the board. They're truly great people.

    Again.. Welcome to the board

    Brooks
  • tootsie1
    tootsie1 Member Posts: 5,044 Member
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    Hi
    Hi, Renee. I'm so sorry about your husband and about your diagnosis. I'm glad you found us, though. This group is so helpful to each other.

    Let us know what you find out from the doctors. I know you're scared now, but it will get better.

    *hugs*
    Gail
  • Aud
    Aud Member Posts: 479 Member
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    Welcome
    Welcome, Renee. I'm so sorry that you lost your husband.
    This is a good, supportive group. Stop by anytime -- the door is always open. Any and all questions are encouraged and welcomed, as are concerns and thoughts. Sorry about your diagnosis but you've found a good place here.
    ~Audrey
  • plh4gail
    plh4gail Member Posts: 1,238 Member
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    Renee, we are here for you. I was diagnosed in June 2010 and joined this group in October. Thank goodness I found this place. My diagnosis was 3C,(I had a 6cm rectal mass into the last layer of the colon with 6/12nodes). I have had the 5 week radiation/continuous chemo, two surgeries, and am now at round 3 of 12 folfox.

    You take care my dear and take one day at a time for the most part. You already know cancer. But each one is indivual. This one is yours so it is different. It's ok to be scared, but also throw in some strength, anger, hope, confidence, etc.

    Be strong and take care, we will be here for you, Gail