Women and Their Hair
One week after her 2nd bone scan, which showed another two tumors in addition to the four found this past April, went to another salon on her mission of hairstyle perfection.
Two things resulted in her latest quest, one)first time got a fancy clip by a black guy, and he was gay and proud of it (according to her report,(two)when she walked in the door I turned and with eyes beaming like a kid on Christmas I said "OMG, its the girl in the picture!"
She grinned from ear to ear and said "I find the one person who can cut my hair the way I like it and now I'm dyin."
Obviously I didn't grin from ear to ear with that. She saw that it didn't strike my funny bone from the deer in the headlights expression frozen on my face.
She walked up to me, cupped my unshaven face in her soft hands and said I can cry anytime, laughs are gettin hard to come by.
That night she slept very soundly. Me, I cried long into the night.
V~V
Comments
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often
it happens with my mom too. She gets very sereen with the fact that she is dying, and I break into tears. The night the dr told us I was with her. The dr had said radiation would not have helped her after explaining her dx. My mom got all excited and smiled and made fists and slammed them down and exclaimed "YES!!" While I was in total tears but trying to hold them back. I didnt think mom understood what the dr had just said, so after he left the room I had her explain it all to me and she did PERFECTLY. Then she told me not to cry, but that she could feel it and had known it for sometime but didnt want me to know. She was just glad that her choice not to do radiation a year ago wouldnt have mattered... she was at peace with it.
(((hugs))) to you. I guess it is only us who are left here without our loved ones who suffer in the end.0 -
I think you've hit on a truth.1Teresa said:often
it happens with my mom too. She gets very sereen with the fact that she is dying, and I break into tears. The night the dr told us I was with her. The dr had said radiation would not have helped her after explaining her dx. My mom got all excited and smiled and made fists and slammed them down and exclaimed "YES!!" While I was in total tears but trying to hold them back. I didnt think mom understood what the dr had just said, so after he left the room I had her explain it all to me and she did PERFECTLY. Then she told me not to cry, but that she could feel it and had known it for sometime but didnt want me to know. She was just glad that her choice not to do radiation a year ago wouldnt have mattered... she was at peace with it.
(((hugs))) to you. I guess it is only us who are left here without our loved ones who suffer in the end.
I'm on my 3rd recurrence, this time mets to the liver, not good. But I am at peace with my journey. I sleep like a baby and live in the moment, looking for tiny moments of joy and beauty and hugging them to me greedily, savoring the limited time I have left on this earth. I find it easy to laugh and be happy. But my poor husband cannot find this 'zen'. He roams the house at night, his face etched in sadness. It breaks my heart that I cannot lift him to this new place of peace i have found for myself (no meds either! my peace is real.) I may suffer phyically in my last days, but it can never compare to the suffering he has endured these past 2 years. I truly do believe that loving caregivers have it worst than those of us with cancer.0
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