Anger...having trouble feeling positive today - HELP!

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AnnabelleandGenevievesmommy
AnnabelleandGenevievesmommy Member Posts: 9
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
So...on Friday I had a lumpectomy and sentinel lymph node biopsy. They only took one lymph node because it looked clean! Yay!!

Today I went in for follow up with the surgeon and...they found three 1mm cancer spots (Im still afraid to use the M word) in the lymph node. UGH, Im so pissed! It was supposed to be clean!! I know it could be worse, but ughhhhhh!

I have been SO positive so far through this experience and I am just really struggling with being positive today. My 1 year old is napping and my 3 year old is on her way home from Preschool...and I need my positivity back before they are in my presence. Help!?!

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  • Lighthouse_7
    Lighthouse_7 Member Posts: 1,566 Member
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    well, I don't know exactly
    well, I don't know exactly what to say except hang in there. After my lumpectomy they didn't get a clean margin and I had to go back. I was so mad too, but I tried to look at it that at least they caught it.
    The kids can get you in a good mood, I find they always make me laugh and things don't seem as bad.
    God Bless
    Hugs,
    Wanda
  • Jean 0609
    Jean 0609 Member Posts: 2,462
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    Sending positive thoughts & prayers your way.
    Sorry to hear your news. I had the same thing happen to me. I had my lumpectomy and thought I was done. However, my margins weren't clear. I was crushed again! I cried the entire day. The next day I woke up and felt better. I guess I just needed to get it out of my system.

    I know keeping a positive attitude has really helped me through this horrible experience. Hang in there, my friend. Hugs, Jean
  • weazer
    weazer Member Posts: 440
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    Jean 0609 said:

    Sending positive thoughts & prayers your way.
    Sorry to hear your news. I had the same thing happen to me. I had my lumpectomy and thought I was done. However, my margins weren't clear. I was crushed again! I cried the entire day. The next day I woke up and felt better. I guess I just needed to get it out of my system.

    I know keeping a positive attitude has really helped me through this horrible experience. Hang in there, my friend. Hugs, Jean

    It Happened to ,me also!
    I was so dissapointed and scared and really did'nt want another surgery.
    I also cried and felt like what the heck is happening.
    What can you do? : )
    You will feel better soon
    Good luck and keep your head up.
    Hugs Karie
  • juanita76
    juanita76 Member Posts: 22
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    stay positive
    All i can is stay positive and continue praying seeking help frm God is the most important thing you can do he has given you three reason to be grateful your husband and you girls Like you said it could be worse.

    He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.

    but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles they will run and not grow weary they will walk and not be faint.

    ISAIAH 40:29, 31
  • sea60
    sea60 Member Posts: 2,613
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    juanita76 said:

    stay positive
    All i can is stay positive and continue praying seeking help frm God is the most important thing you can do he has given you three reason to be grateful your husband and you girls Like you said it could be worse.

    He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.

    but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles they will run and not grow weary they will walk and not be faint.

    ISAIAH 40:29, 31

    In agreement with Juanita
    I know how scary this can be. I cling on to God's Word and it gives me peace. Sometimes I have to just repeat it and let it wash over me.

    Here's one I'd like to share:

    I AM holding you by your right hand -- I, the Lord your God. And I say to you, "Do not be afraid. I am here to help you." Isaiah 41:13


    I'll be praying for you,

    Sylvia
  • CypressCynthia
    CypressCynthia Member Posts: 4,014 Member
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    Katherine was four when I
    Katherine was four when I was diagnosed. I had 4 positive nodes and felt that my world was crashing in. That was 23 yrs ago.

    So I hope my story helps some. I had mastectomies, radiation, chemo, tamoxifen, etc. But I am still here.

    It is ok to feel bad somedays, but then just get back up and fight. We can't let the beast win!

    You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

    And I will try and find a photo of Katherine and me today.
  • CypressCynthia
    CypressCynthia Member Posts: 4,014 Member
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    Katherine was four when I
    Katherine was four when I was diagnosed. I had 4 positive nodes and felt that my world was crashing in. That was 23 yrs ago.

    So I hope my story helps some. I had mastectomies, radiation, chemo, tamoxifen, etc. But I am still here.

    It is ok to feel bad somedays, but then just get back up and fight. We can't let the beast win!

    You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

    And I will try and find a photo of Katherine and me today.

    Ok there we are together at
    Ok here we are together at my niece's wedding shower. Never surrender!
  • carriesoup
    carriesoup Member Posts: 144
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    i know exactly how you feel!
    when i had my lumpectomy and sentinel node biopsy they found 1 of them was affected and i they had to go back in and take out the rest of my nodes. he wanted more of a margin on one side of my breast. i was so frustrated!!! i was really hoping 1 surgery would be it! i don't even have children, so i can imagine how much more stressed you must be!!

    you can do this! stay positive!! it has gotten me this far! (sorry, so many exclamation points)

    hope you're feeling better :)

    *hugs*

    carrie :)
  • aisling8
    aisling8 Member Posts: 1,627 Member
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    i know exactly how you feel!
    when i had my lumpectomy and sentinel node biopsy they found 1 of them was affected and i they had to go back in and take out the rest of my nodes. he wanted more of a margin on one side of my breast. i was so frustrated!!! i was really hoping 1 surgery would be it! i don't even have children, so i can imagine how much more stressed you must be!!

    you can do this! stay positive!! it has gotten me this far! (sorry, so many exclamation points)

    hope you're feeling better :)

    *hugs*

    carrie :)

    I hear you
    It's hugely disappointing.

    Sending you positive energy,

    xo
    Victoria
  • AnnabelleandGenevievesmommy
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    aisling8 said:

    I hear you
    It's hugely disappointing.

    Sending you positive energy,

    xo
    Victoria

    Thank you <3</b>
    Thanks ladies. Im glad I can come here for support. Some days will just suck...and I have to get over that. I guess Im just started and afraid that they will just keep finding more and it will never end. Heh - thats fear for ya, right? I'm sure I can get back onto my positive thinking, its just been a rough day. Thank you for the love.

    ~ Heather
  • disneyfan2008
    disneyfan2008 Member Posts: 6,583 Member
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    totally understand
    I was positive from day one when called back for mammo, then biopsy etc...post surgery and during radiation I just had pissy day. My caring, loving husband said you need to be more positive. I SAID OH YOU DINT' SAY THAT! I HAVE BEEN POSITIVE THIS WHOLE TIME AND DIDNT' MISS A BEAT TAKING CARE OF HOUSE/FAMILY ETC. He has never said it again.

    so we just have down times...and we deserve them...YOU can pout if you want..!