Need help with this

Christine B.

Hello, I wrote in a few weeks ago when ovarian cancer was suspected. I had surgery on the 10th and diagnosed with Stage IV. The surgery had to stop short of planned hysterectomy etc. due to blocked intestine and too much in abdomen and omentum. I have a colostomy. I will begin chemo paclitaxel and carboplatin on Oct. 12th and am trying to hold onto the words of hope the ob/gyn ocologist surgeon and the oncologist. But today and yesterday I had a hard time just getting one foot in front of the other.My husband has been here for me, but it's hard on him I know trying to talk me through this. I talked with my pastor yesterday also. I am dealing with every emotion. I feel like I just can't do this. I would appreciate any suggestions from others who have been through this. Thank you.

Hissy_Fitz

Christine....you are just
Christine....you are just about in the same spot I was last October. In fact, Oct 12 is my wedding anniversary and I spent it in the hospital, recovering from my de-bulking/hysterectomy/bowel resection surgery.

I was diagnosed in Sept of 2009, stage IIIc, and it was a total shock. My PCP, when he delivered the news (via phone) told me first that I appeared to have advanced Ovarian Cancer and then, in kind of a by-the-way sort of way, mentioned that the five year survival rate was "less than 30 percent".

I have since learned that those are old stats. The survival rate, while not wonderful, is somewhat better than that, and secondly, it's not a do or die deal. You can live with OC for many years.

We all hope for a total and long-lasting remission, of course, but the next best thing is finding a really good Gyn/Oncologist who can help manage the disease and give us quality of life, as well as years. I have met women - quite a number of women - who have been in and out of treatment for over 10 years, but they are still alive and still enjoying life. They just have to allow for interruptions to accommodate their treatments.

I had the traditional 6 rounds of Carbo/Taxol and then started immediately on monthly Taxol maintenance. It does mean I am tied the calendar for blood draws and chemo infusions, but my quality of life is great and I only have a whine fest every once in a while.

Stage IV is not a death sentence. Remember that. And I know what you mean about the emotions and feeling like you can't do this, but you are going to be surprised at what you can do. People tell me all the time how "strong" I am. Little do they know. None of us knows how strong we are, until being strong is the only option we have.

Carlene

saundra

Dear Christine B
You are feeling what we all feel when given this diagnosis. (Click on my picture to read my Stage IV history)
You will be busy with test for awhile. Get and keep copies of scan reports and lab reports to refer back to on occasion. Your chemo regimen is the usual proscribed ones. The side effects are numbness in fingers and toes, (NOTE: NOT EVERYONE GETS THE SIDE EFFECTS) nausea, the mouth soreness. My oncology nurse told me to take L-lysine to prevent mouth sores at my first treatment and didn't have any. I have taken Vit. B 6 and L-glutamine at the suggestion of our Bonnie R, whom we just lost from this group. I have very little numbness in my toes occasionally. It took me 72 hours to get into the sickness part of the side effects, which was deep bone pain in my legs, no nausea (I took the anti-nausea meds prescribed) and just laid on the couch. I did take stool softeners after the first treatment prior to going for the next one due to extreme constipation. You also have to drink gallons of water to flush you system and help with constipation. I also take a mile veg. laxative the day of the chemo. Others on this discussion group will share their experience if you ask. We know how you feel and what you are going through at this time. In a couple of months when you see those CA125 numbers go down you will even out emotion wise. Some of us take a mild anti-depressant which really helps with the night sweats. ((((HUGS for you)))) Saundra

Mwee

Christine
Many of us (unfortunately) know that place that you are in. You can do this. Taxol/carbo infusions are rough, but you'll get through them one at a time. Hang onto those words of hope from your Drs. for they know the options that they have for you and don't spread around those hope messages lightly. You have found your way to a wonderful support system.
(((HUGS))) Maria

nancy591

hysterectomy?
Did you say they couldn't do a hysterectomy due to a blockage?

Just to let you know, 2yrs ago I was diagnosed with stage IV ovarian after being misdiagnosed for roughly 5 months. I also had an ostomy. I went through 5 rounds of IV carbo/taxol then had my ostomy reversed. I then went onto receive 3 more additional rounds of IP cisplat/taxol. I was in remission. Although I am back on chemo I am definately handling these latest chemo drugs much better and I am living an active and full life. In some aspects I am much happier now then prior to chemo.

Yes, it IS tough and it does suck. I was 41yrs old at the time of my diagnosis. My two younger kids were 3 and 5yrs old. We had just moved into our newly built and newly furnished house. I was living MY American dream and loving my life.

Things will get worse before they get better. BUT there is a light at the end of that chemo tunnel. Once you get to the other side going through the chemo will all be worth it. Hopefully, you will enjoy a lengthy remission. Hold on, Christine. It will eventually get better.

vj1

Mwee said:

Christine
Many of us (unfortunately) know that place that you are in. You can do this. Taxol/carbo infusions are rough, but you'll get through them one at a time. Hang onto those words of hope from your Drs. for they know the options that they have for you and don't spread around those hope messages lightly. You have found your way to a wonderful support system.
(((HUGS))) Maria

Christine
I also agree with all these comments. Yes, you will get thru this. I feel this is a wonderful quote---"courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway." We all share that saddle with you.

V

kikiz

vj1 said:

Christine
I also agree with all these comments. Yes, you will get thru this. I feel this is a wonderful quote---"courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway." We all share that saddle with you.

V

Christine
I agree with everything said. Remember to let others help you when you need it. One of the tricks I used with myself was I hate doing dishes. I would tell myself everyday that if I could do the stupid dishes, then I could do anything. There were a few times I could not do them but overall it worked. Tears, Prayer and Famly helped alot too. May God Bless you.
Lori

groundeffect

Keep your hope!
Christine,

You have been given messages by women with Stage IV who speak from experience. I will speak from observation: I joined a local support group more than seven years ago, and have met very few Stage IV survivors. We have a wonderful woman in our group now who has been coming to our meetings for about three years, and she was diagnosed with Stage IV. I told her at our last meeting that I never would have expected to enjoy her company for so long had she been diagnosed in the early 2000's; I feel the treatments have improved tremendously in recent years, especially for those living with Stage IV.

We have all felt the emotion of not be able to cope with ovarian cancer. I think you'll do all right - just be ready for the future!

Hissy_Fitz

groundeffect said:

Keep your hope!
Christine,

You have been given messages by women with Stage IV who speak from experience. I will speak from observation: I joined a local support group more than seven years ago, and have met very few Stage IV survivors. We have a wonderful woman in our group now who has been coming to our meetings for about three years, and she was diagnosed with Stage IV. I told her at our last meeting that I never would have expected to enjoy her company for so long had she been diagnosed in the early 2000's; I feel the treatments have improved tremendously in recent years, especially for those living with Stage IV.

We have all felt the emotion of not be able to cope with ovarian cancer. I think you'll do all right - just be ready for the future!

Just wanted to mention that
Just wanted to mention that Patsy Ramsey, mother of slain child beauty queen Jon Benet Ramsey, was diagnosed with Stage IV Ovarian Cancer in 1992 and was NED for 11 years. Her Cancer returned in 2003, however, and she died in 2006, at the age of 49. I personally believe that were it not for all the stress of her daughter's murder and the subsequent "umbrella of suspicion" that was cast over her and her family, Patsy might never have suffered a recurrence.

Tina Brown

Hello Christine
Many of here will understand fully what you are going through. It is almost a year that I was diagnosed and it was a total and complete shock for me because I thought I had a really bad chest infection. When I went in to the hospital and was told I had cancer it was the absolute worse feeling EVER. BUT a friend once told me "THE BEGINNING BIT IS THE HARDEST" because everything is new and a shock. I have PPC where the cancer cells are spread out all over the lining of the tummy. I don't have a tumor that can be removed with surgery so I just rely on chemo. Because I had problems in my chest means that the cancer cells spread to the lining of my lungs so I am stage 4 too.

The good news is I had 6 rounds of carbo/taxol every 3 weeks and finished it in March. It is almost a year since I became ill yet I feel so well now. I am having regular check ups (next one due in a few weeks) so they can monitor the cancer.

It is really hard on the emotions because it is natural as humans to always think of the worse. You will find a way of living with this. I and I know other ladies here take anti-depressants which really help with anxiety. Some people receive counselling and other people find other ways.

This site is fantastic as we are all in the same situation and are here to help each other. There is always someone who has had what you have had or has been through what you have been through - so just ask and we will be there to help.

Keep posting cos I'd like to hear how you get on, love Tina xx

MK_4Dani

You CAN and WILL get thru
You CAN and WILL get thru this...all of us on this board have been there done that and we are still here to PUMP you up! After the first chemo you will begin to feel more hopeful...your focus will be getting thru the next day....to the next treatment. This part after surgery and fist chemo is the toughest emotionally. Also consider asking doc for meds for anxiety...they can help you quiet your mind. Hang in there!
Hugs,
Mary

San2010

You are stronger than you think
Christine,
In March 2010 I was diagnosed with Stage IIIC. Hearing those words was like a sucker punch to the stomach. I couldn't believe this was happening to me. My gynoc explained my options, and gave me some information to research. I could not bear to read all the information you can find on the internet. My best friend, took on the task of doing my research and blogging. I suggest you find a trusted friend to help you with this. Yes...make informed decisions but limit yourself because everything on the internet can be very scary.

Remember, everyone handles chemo differently. I was blessed, I did not vomit and lose weight. I did experience the bone aches, constipation, and hair loss. I did work in between treatments. Stay positive.

My suggestion to you is find a local support group for Ovarian Cancer. I have met women that have been a godsend. They explained things to me, gave me suggestions, and just provided morale support.


As mentioned in earlier post, we understand how you feel. You can do it, you are stronger than you know and so is your husband.

msfanciful

Hi Christine,
Everyone has
Hi Christine,

Everyone has pretty much covered every possible aspect as to how to get through this.

I just want you to hold and revisit why life is important to fight for it.

I'll keep you in my prayers.

Sharon