Has anyone seen a counselor to help with the emotional part of all of this?
Anyway, if you've been to a counselor - did you think it helped?
♥ Lynn ♥
Comments
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You should!
Hey Lynn! No, I haven't been to a counselor, but, I know of so many that have and have gotten so much help by going.
If you feel you need someone to talk to, please do find one and go.
I know that we keep a lot bottled up inside of us, and, that isn't healthy at all.
So, good luck to you and let us know if you go to a counselor and how it is.
Sue
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emotional well-being
I have always said you cannot put a price on your emotional well-being and in the whole cancer deal, the emotional part is just as important as the physical. We need to treat the whole and often have to go to different people for this.
I did physco-spiritual work before my diagnosis and up until now. It has been extremely beneficial in helping me put things in perspective and finding more of the joy within even during cancer treatment. If this is what you feel you need right now, I would say go for it!0 -
IT can help......
Here's my take......my son is a psychologist.......I was able to discuss some issues with him, but being my son, it was a bit emotional for him......and I certainly didn't want to add to his distress......Many have found help in seeking treatment with a counselor.......but my feeling is this......and my son agreed.....it really helps to seek support and guidance from one who has walked in your shoes...for they truly understand what you've been through and are going through......perhaps a bc support group would work for you...I looked to people such as the brave women on this site......I spoke openly with my oncologist and radiation oncologist....both told me that going through what we've experienced produces Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome for many women..My cancer center offers help in this area with counselors available and support groups.....along with yoga, massages, nutrition etc while undergoing treatment and afterwards......it really is a great center! They also offer what's called "Finding Your New Normal".......that seemed to be the hardest thing for me......"what do I do now, that all treatment is finished?" Which was 9 months ago.......I must say I am pretty much "back to normal" (if I were ever normal to begin with.tee-hee) It hasn't been easy but I've made up my mind to try and put this behind me.....that's not to say I don't think about it but I don't dwell on it like I did this time last year undergoing chemo..I fought for my life daily for months.....now I want to LIVE MY LIFE daily.....I have been able to put aside the "what ifs".......I feel like that isn't living, it isn't easy but I'm doing it.......Each of us has to do what we feel is best for us......
I did tell all 3 of my physicians when I was first dx that they did a very poor job of dealing with my "mental health" ....that you just can't tell someone they have a life threatening disease, lay out a treatment plan and then say, "see you the day before your first chemo"......That they MUST take the mental part of this more seriously....all agreed, somewhat sheepishly.......I was finally given the lowest dose of Valium.....had never taken anything like that before.....it worked for me....It really "took the edge off".....I wouldn't hesitate to tell anyone to demand something for the mental anxiety!
Don't know if this has helped with your initial question......but if you feel you need to see a counselor, go for it! We need and can use all the help we can get...
I wish you the best
Peace be with you,
Nancy0 -
LynnMAJW said:IT can help......
Here's my take......my son is a psychologist.......I was able to discuss some issues with him, but being my son, it was a bit emotional for him......and I certainly didn't want to add to his distress......Many have found help in seeking treatment with a counselor.......but my feeling is this......and my son agreed.....it really helps to seek support and guidance from one who has walked in your shoes...for they truly understand what you've been through and are going through......perhaps a bc support group would work for you...I looked to people such as the brave women on this site......I spoke openly with my oncologist and radiation oncologist....both told me that going through what we've experienced produces Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome for many women..My cancer center offers help in this area with counselors available and support groups.....along with yoga, massages, nutrition etc while undergoing treatment and afterwards......it really is a great center! They also offer what's called "Finding Your New Normal".......that seemed to be the hardest thing for me......"what do I do now, that all treatment is finished?" Which was 9 months ago.......I must say I am pretty much "back to normal" (if I were ever normal to begin with.tee-hee) It hasn't been easy but I've made up my mind to try and put this behind me.....that's not to say I don't think about it but I don't dwell on it like I did this time last year undergoing chemo..I fought for my life daily for months.....now I want to LIVE MY LIFE daily.....I have been able to put aside the "what ifs".......I feel like that isn't living, it isn't easy but I'm doing it.......Each of us has to do what we feel is best for us......
I did tell all 3 of my physicians when I was first dx that they did a very poor job of dealing with my "mental health" ....that you just can't tell someone they have a life threatening disease, lay out a treatment plan and then say, "see you the day before your first chemo"......That they MUST take the mental part of this more seriously....all agreed, somewhat sheepishly.......I was finally given the lowest dose of Valium.....had never taken anything like that before.....it worked for me....It really "took the edge off".....I wouldn't hesitate to tell anyone to demand something for the mental anxiety!
Don't know if this has helped with your initial question......but if you feel you need to see a counselor, go for it! We need and can use all the help we can get...
I wish you the best
Peace be with you,
Nancy
please do it. It is a normal process, you should feel comfortable about it.
Hugs0 -
Yes, yes, yes!!!!!!
She was a gal that had both a private practice and a 'deal' with my treatment center...the first month was free...she specialized in cancer patients...
I was carrying so much junk, with both cancers, AND my first patient partner who had passed, I sought help...
It REALLY helped!!!
Hugs, Kathi0 -
I actually just went to seeKathiM said:Yes, yes, yes!!!!!!
She was a gal that had both a private practice and a 'deal' with my treatment center...the first month was free...she specialized in cancer patients...
I was carrying so much junk, with both cancers, AND my first patient partner who had passed, I sought help...
It REALLY helped!!!
Hugs, Kathi
I actually just went to see someone for my depression.I have started an antidepressant, and they suggested a cancer support group and group therapy with other people fighting depression. I think it's a pretty common side effect of the whole cancer process. I just know that I'm not the person I used to be and I want some of that person back. Do what you need to do to feel better.0 -
I thought I Was seekinglynn1950 said:From Lynn to Lynn
I really struggled once active treatment was finished and found counseling very, very, very helpful. Don't hesitate to seek support. xoxoxo Lynn
I thought I Was seeking emotional release every time I logged in. It may not be professional but it helps hold me together.0 -
I have not seen aMenda said:I thought I Was seeking
I thought I Was seeking emotional release every time I logged in. It may not be professional but it helps hold me together.
I have not seen a professional, but I really want to. But, ugh, i already have so many doctor and test appointment. This is something i am looking into. And, yes, I also have this warm, fuzzy place to come to.0 -
From the evening I found the lump until several weeks aftermeena1 said:I have not seen a
I have not seen a professional, but I really want to. But, ugh, i already have so many doctor and test appointment. This is something i am looking into. And, yes, I also have this warm, fuzzy place to come to.
treatment was finished, I took Ativan (an anti-aniety drug)twice daily. It helped me calm down and focus during the day and sleep at nite. I never thought about my surgeon and onc etc. as being emotional docs for me....they were there for me physically. Both are wonderful and I can talk to my onc for as long as I need to...I ask for Ativan and she prescribs it. If I wanted a referral to a group or physcologist she would certainly do that. I didn't and don't need that.
The nite of my mastectomy, a social worker of some sort asked me if I would be interested in a Reach for Recovery person and program...I was all "drugged" up and said yes. Well, they sent me all kinds of stuff and my "person" and I talked on the phone and made a date to meet but by that time I was too sick from chemo. We finally met afterwards. While she's very nice, this board is so much better.
I feel fortunate, I've got a great support system, my docs are great, my mastectomy bra and prosthesis fitter is wonderful in that department but no one, not even a "professional" can make me not think about it everyday...not make me think about every little pain in my hip etc as a possible sign of trouble...I can't imagine what they could possibly say to make this all go away. My life is back to normal, I laugh, I love, I still enjoy all the things I enjoyed before, I guess I'm lucky. BUT, if I ever have the feeling of being so overwhelmed and start being depressed and crying all the time etc.,and an Ativan did not help, I would not hesitate to seek out help. I would love to hear from some of you who have gone what they say that helps.0 -
YES YES YES
I learned at a young age I didn't have the answers but actually the councilor made me realize that I did I just wasn't asking myself the right QUESTION!
I was a single mother and didn't have someone else to help often dating children themselves. Children bring with them an insight that is pure and thank goodness I had a son that brought me back to reality quickly.
Many times in my life I have had to find Emotional Help and after years of pain and sickness, tired of being sick and tired I had to find help again or I was going to loose it. Nothing is worth loosing it over and I now know that going to get help is not a weakness in me it is the ability to know that what I am doing isn't working and wanting to change the coarse of my life.
I am so grateful these questions are being asked, it gives me great hope that women will not have to suffer so much. We take on the world and are often left holding our own bag, isn't that the saying. Let someone help you along the way and one doesn't feel so alone in the battle.
Tara0 -
Do you feel like you DO get emotional support from your team?
If so, how do they show that support? I'd like to come up with some idea to present to my nurse coordinator about ways to show newly dx patients that there is support out there - and that they don't have to feel like they are trying to find their own way through all of this. Maybe a card that could be sent to them with specific web addresses to support groups (like this one). I'm sure I was given info on support groups or places to call for support, but with all the new things I was dealing with after dx, the last thing I wanted to do was to try to go out and meet someone new - to actually make that phone call or drive to that group where I didn't know anyone. Maybe if someone would have asked me "can someone who has been through this give you a call" instead of me being the one to make that first call . . . I don't know - I think that would have been easier to get some connection made for me.
I also think that we need to be given some kind of "map" to describe all the things we'll be dealing with as we face our immediate future. All the new procedures, descriptions, tests, meds, treatments - all things that are new terms to us, but that our care providers live with every day - I think that they, maybe, don't understand how new that is to all of us, when it's become so much a part of their everyday lives.
Thanks for all your support - I am so glad I have this group - it's the BEST!!
(My husband just saw I was on this site, and told my sister, who's visiting, that I'm "lost" to them for quite awhile now!)
♥ Lynn ♥0 -
Lynn, what a good idea.MNLynn said:Do you feel like you DO get emotional support from your team?
If so, how do they show that support? I'd like to come up with some idea to present to my nurse coordinator about ways to show newly dx patients that there is support out there - and that they don't have to feel like they are trying to find their own way through all of this. Maybe a card that could be sent to them with specific web addresses to support groups (like this one). I'm sure I was given info on support groups or places to call for support, but with all the new things I was dealing with after dx, the last thing I wanted to do was to try to go out and meet someone new - to actually make that phone call or drive to that group where I didn't know anyone. Maybe if someone would have asked me "can someone who has been through this give you a call" instead of me being the one to make that first call . . . I don't know - I think that would have been easier to get some connection made for me.
I also think that we need to be given some kind of "map" to describe all the things we'll be dealing with as we face our immediate future. All the new procedures, descriptions, tests, meds, treatments - all things that are new terms to us, but that our care providers live with every day - I think that they, maybe, don't understand how new that is to all of us, when it's become so much a part of their everyday lives.
Thanks for all your support - I am so glad I have this group - it's the BEST!!
(My husband just saw I was on this site, and told my sister, who's visiting, that I'm "lost" to them for quite awhile now!)
♥ Lynn ♥
When I had myh first appt. with my onc, she did map out everything for me and then I went to Patient Education with the Nurse Practioner whose personality was similar to mine and we had a great time laughing and chatting (I took my husband and a very dear friend as well). During that appt. I was given tons of written info on all of the drugs, side effects, treatments for each side effect, nutrition info, phone numbers and addresses of mastectomy bras/prothesis/wig shops, the Look Good Feel Good program, Rx's for anti-nausea and all of the meds I would need, all in a beaautiful folder that I kept (literally) on my bed during chemo. I was told to call 24/7 with any problems. I was given a tour of the chemo room and told in advance the step by step procedure for chemo, shown the refrigerator, TV, food treats area etc. Nothing was left to question. It makes a difference when you know everyone cares and is on your side and makes you feel so WELCOME. There are no mysteries, you've been given all the tools and info you need in this fight and you have the knowlege that everyone in that office is there for you.
After joining this board I realized that this is not the case with everyone...it should be. It should be standard. Lynn, if you can make a difference with only one office that would be a miracle. You go girl.
Hugs, Judy :-)0 -
Yes, and I am 100% right there behind Nancy ..Skeezie said:Lynn, what a good idea.
When I had myh first appt. with my onc, she did map out everything for me and then I went to Patient Education with the Nurse Practioner whose personality was similar to mine and we had a great time laughing and chatting (I took my husband and a very dear friend as well). During that appt. I was given tons of written info on all of the drugs, side effects, treatments for each side effect, nutrition info, phone numbers and addresses of mastectomy bras/prothesis/wig shops, the Look Good Feel Good program, Rx's for anti-nausea and all of the meds I would need, all in a beaautiful folder that I kept (literally) on my bed during chemo. I was told to call 24/7 with any problems. I was given a tour of the chemo room and told in advance the step by step procedure for chemo, shown the refrigerator, TV, food treats area etc. Nothing was left to question. It makes a difference when you know everyone cares and is on your side and makes you feel so WELCOME. There are no mysteries, you've been given all the tools and info you need in this fight and you have the knowlege that everyone in that office is there for you.
After joining this board I realized that this is not the case with everyone...it should be. It should be standard. Lynn, if you can make a difference with only one office that would be a miracle. You go girl.
Hugs, Judy :-)
and so many others .. Our Oncologist and Breast Cancer doctors should be referring us to therapist, Cancer support groups - affiliated their office.
Strength and Courage :-D
Vicki Sam0 -
Ditto Vicki Sam and NancyVickiSam said:Yes, and I am 100% right there behind Nancy ..
and so many others .. Our Oncologist and Breast Cancer doctors should be referring us to therapist, Cancer support groups - affiliated their office.
Strength and Courage :-D
Vicki Sam
Ditto Vicki Sam and Nancy0 -
ditto
I saw a couselor I found through my doc. She specialized in people dealing with medical conditions like cancer and heart, ect. She was very good, just getting some of my feeling out, particulary while I was still in a state of mastectomy was really healthy for me.
Good luck and God Bless!0 -
ditto
I saw a couselor I found through my doc. She specialized in people dealing with medical conditions like cancer and heart, ect. She was very good, just getting some of my feeling out, particulary while I was still in a state of mastectomy was really healthy for me.
Good luck and God Bless!0
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