Wife had a bilateral

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  • carkris
    carkris Member Posts: 4,553 Member
    #22
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    cahjah75 said:

    Greg
    I'm glad I found this post. I didn't realize your wife just had her surgery on Friday. You are a very supportive husband. My husband is supportive in a very quiet way. Doesn't say much:) When you commented on my post about the drains, it was certainly first hand knowledge. However, I'm still wondering.... I am not having reconstructive surgery until a later date because I will be having chemo and radiation. Did your wife have any lymph nodes removed or did she have reconstruction started and is that why she has drains? I think I'll be ok for that first look although my sister said not to do it alone in case I faint. Hang in there. You're doing what you need to. I agree that these message boards are a wealth of info!
    Charlene

    I still dont walk around
    I still dont walk around shirtless, but when I get sad I just think I needed to get rid of them they were killing me, Literally. FYI your wife will prob be all over your case for things you consider dumb, I know my husband is my safe person, and sometimes he gets it when he doesnt deserve it sometimes he does. this is not an easy ride, it does get better. hang in there you guys will better and stronger for it. vent here all you need to. P.S. when I feel bad about my flat chest I also thing if my husband had to lose a part of his body, I would still be with him and grateful to have him. I guess this is the practical part of me speaking because no one WANTS this. it stinks.
  • Balentine
    Balentine Member Posts: 393
    #23
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    carkris said:

    I still dont walk around
    I still dont walk around shirtless, but when I get sad I just think I needed to get rid of them they were killing me, Literally. FYI your wife will prob be all over your case for things you consider dumb, I know my husband is my safe person, and sometimes he gets it when he doesnt deserve it sometimes he does. this is not an easy ride, it does get better. hang in there you guys will better and stronger for it. vent here all you need to. P.S. when I feel bad about my flat chest I also thing if my husband had to lose a part of his body, I would still be with him and grateful to have him. I guess this is the practical part of me speaking because no one WANTS this. it stinks.

    Greg it will take time to get used to
    My husband had to leave the room after I removed my bandage also. WE both we horrified to see the big scar, no breast, and concave chest. I think couples should discuss reconstruction but ultimately it is up to her whether she wants to go through that major surgery. My husband continues to root for the reconstruction. I have 2 years to decide with my insurance so I plan to have it next summer. Know that 'this too shall pass' ....there is life after breast cancer and your love for one another is paramount. Know that it will take a few months for your wife to really recover and get going again and for the pain and numbness to subside. I am 5 months out of surgery and I still have some pain at the mastectomy site. Massaging it does help but I would not recommend this until her incision is completely healed...probably 6 weeks or so. I hope this helps. Keep your head up and trust God and lean on Him to get you through this time.
    Lorrie

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