Feeling Guilty

Ladybug435
Ladybug435 Member Posts: 1
edited March 2014 in Caregivers #1
My husband and I went to get the results of his latest CAT scan. It was the three year check up after colon cancer surgery and 30 weeks of chemo. The chemo changed him, it aged him and he really never recovered fully. He is 62. We were blindsided when the doctor said there is a mass in his abdomen at the surgery site that was not there 3 months ago. I have Post Polio Syndrome and have been diagnosed with MS 6 months ago. I feel so guilty but I just cannot do this again. I love him so much but if this is the start of another round of cancer, I feel I am both physically and emotionally unable to do this.We have no family, just the two of us, the last time around, I did it all but I don't know what to do now. My guilt at these feeling is overwhelming.

Comments

  • geotina
    geotina Member Posts: 2,111 Member
    #2
    Ladybug
    Don't feel guilty, it is very normal. Colon cancer does have a high recurrence rate, your doctors should have told you that. My husband is Stage IV, transverse colon, mets to lungs and liver. He is stable now but one day that other shoe will drop. My husband is now 61.

    What do the doctors want to do going forward? Do they want to do surgery on the mass? Do a biopsy? Is it indeed cancer? Until you get some exact answers you really don't know what is ahead. Exactly where is the mass in the abdomen?

    There are a tremendous amount of treatment options out there for colon cancer so don't lose hope and you just do what you need to do.

    I usually post on the colorectal board, it is almost as active as the breast cancer board. There are people on there that have had every treatment, surgery, radiation that is out there so once you get some exact answers post on that board and you will get responses from people that have been there, done that. Experience from other colorectal patients is one of the most valuable tools I have found.

    And yes, you can do it. You are a little angry, disappointed and depressed right now at the news (and that is so very normal) but once things settle down and you get a treatment plan down, you will just do what you have to do.

    If you post on the colorectal board you will get lots of answers and also find lots of people that truly care because we are all fighting the same disease.


    Good luck and take care - Tina
  • Tina Blondek
    Tina Blondek Member Posts: 1,500 Member
    #3
    Hey Ladybug!Are you the
    Hey Ladybug!
    Are you the same ladybug from the chat room? I am so sorry you are having to face this battle again, now with yourself being ill. Wow! that is a lot to digest. I am praying for you now. Like geotina said, wait to get some more info on this stomach mass. Get it biopsed, get it staged, find out about the treatment options. Then.....in the near future, find out about what kind of help is out there for you. Home healthcare nurses, caregivers who come a few times a week, etc. Do not jump the gun right away. You also have to remember to take care of yourself. Hope this helps. Thinking and praying for you.
    Tina 2

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