Post chemo living

Tina Brown

Hiya everyone

Just thought I would ask a few questions about living after chemo. My chemo finished March 26th and I am slowly getting my strength back.

1. I am conscious of having put weight on and can no longer fit into my pre-cancer clothes. I have tried to lose weight but it is not happening. Is this normal in your experience? Am I expecting too much? I have had to buy clothes 2 sizes bigger than I was wearing before. It does bother me but if it is to be expected I will feel much better.

2. (Sorry if this is a senstive subject) I find I have no sex drive or desire. This was never a problem before cancer. Could this be yet another side effect of the chemo? Pyschologically I feel so unattractive because of my weight gain & the fact I am bald.

3. I am experiencing hot flushes, one after the other. I have not had any sugery but did go through the menopause before I got cancer. Does chemo cause these hot flushes?

Sorry to be asking all of these questions but it is not something I feel I could bother medical staff with and I know everyone of you will be able to give some answers that make sense.

Thanks you Tina xx

cancer survivor x 4

Post Chemo
Good Morning Tina,
what a beautiful morning it is in the Eastern Panhandle of West Virginia. The mountians are beautiful this time of year. I was not going through menopause before surgery. I have hot flashes everyday. They only last a couple of minutes and then it goes away. They are not anything I can not deal with. I lost 20 pounds in the hospital during my 12 day stay there. It took me 9 monthes to gain the 20 pounds back and I did not gain anymore weight. I try and walk a mile every evening. It's hard. I have to push myself. I think getting in the pool and swimming laps is the best way to loose weight. You burn alot of calories fast. It is okay to ask about sex. When I was going through chemo, I did not feel attractive or sexy, but I tried anyway. Now that I have hair and look better I feel more attractive. Things are getting back to normal. I have had all my female parts removed, so things have changed. I do not have the desire or sex drive that I used to have, but as time goes on, things seem to be improving. The biggest problem is vaginal dryness, but that can be fixed lots of ways. It is going to take alittle time. You have not been out of chemo long enough. My husband never pushed me and was very understanding. He had to wait along time and I appreciated that. You can be creative and take care of him. My biggest problem is I get tired so fast. I have been out of chemo since November. Just be patient. Everything will work itself out. Love You, Paula

Kathy T

I can completly understand
I can completly understand everything you wrote. I to have gained weight--about 2 size too. I was on weight watchers before surgery and lost 30 pounds now I have found all that weight again. I have tried to lose it but it seems to no want to go away. Hopefully with the nicer weather I will be more active and maybe that will help. Also sex in not even something that I want to think about. Husband doesn't understand it so well but I just feel fat and very unattractive--I have some hair but not enough for me to feel comfortable. I finished my chemo in dec 09. Still get very tried at time too. My engery level seems to be very low. Also have hot flashes although they don't last very long. Hopefully they are not too bad in the summer. Really glad to hear someone is going through the same thing. Sometimes you feel like you are the only one. Hope everything works out for you. Will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Kathy

Lisa13Q

Hi
Tina,

I am not a cancer survivor but I take care of my mother...AND had my ovaries removed last fall because of my genetic pre-disposition to OVCA...Since my surgery, I have at least 3 hot flashes a day, some so bad I get dizzy. I have also gained weight and can't take it off....I think all this is normal when hormones are involved...I have changed my diet and am trying to exercise more..Mostly, I am learning to accept that I need little food and low calorie food.It sucks, but it works...

azgrandma

Lisa13Q said:

Hi
Tina,

I am not a cancer survivor but I take care of my mother...AND had my ovaries removed last fall because of my genetic pre-disposition to OVCA...Since my surgery, I have at least 3 hot flashes a day, some so bad I get dizzy. I have also gained weight and can't take it off....I think all this is normal when hormones are involved...I have changed my diet and am trying to exercise more..Mostly, I am learning to accept that I need little food and low calorie food.It sucks, but it works...

Hi Tina
Hi Tina
i was the opposite i lost so much weight had to get new clothes.
I am sure once all of the chemo gets out of your body your weight will return to normal. the chemo does a number on our bodies, just hang in there honey, it will get better
Lynda

Hissy_Fitz

I lost a ton of weight
I lost a ton of weight post-surgery....about 40 pounds. I have gained it all back but I could not believe how HARD it was to stop the weight loss. I felt like I was eating all the time, just trying to keep up.

My last chemo session, there was a near-skeletal woman across from me who had already had a feeding tube put in place, but she would not use it, evidently. The staff got her doctor to come over and give her a long "talking to", during which the doctor mentioned that it takes at least 1800 calories a day for a chemo patient to maintain his/her weight. So maybe your body just got used to those extra calories and now it still "wants" them.

My libido runs hot and cold. But it did that before Cancer. And the whole bald thing freaks me out, too. Sex with a bald woman cannot be any man's idea of a dream date.

I have never had a hot flash. Not during memopause, not after surgery....never. And I am so cold-natured, I was really hoping for them, dang it.

Carlene

lindaprocopio

Hissy_Fitz said:

I lost a ton of weight
I lost a ton of weight post-surgery....about 40 pounds. I have gained it all back but I could not believe how HARD it was to stop the weight loss. I felt like I was eating all the time, just trying to keep up.

My last chemo session, there was a near-skeletal woman across from me who had already had a feeding tube put in place, but she would not use it, evidently. The staff got her doctor to come over and give her a long "talking to", during which the doctor mentioned that it takes at least 1800 calories a day for a chemo patient to maintain his/her weight. So maybe your body just got used to those extra calories and now it still "wants" them.

My libido runs hot and cold. But it did that before Cancer. And the whole bald thing freaks me out, too. Sex with a bald woman cannot be any man's idea of a dream date.

I have never had a hot flash. Not during memopause, not after surgery....never. And I am so cold-natured, I was really hoping for them, dang it.

Carlene

My initial chemo round ended Match 26, 2009!! (a yr to the day!)
Funny that your chemo ended 1 year to the day that my initial carbo/taxol rounds ended! HA!

Both times I was bald I felt unattractive and undesirable. I gained 15 pounds with my 1st chemo protocol, lost 8 of that with radiation, then gained 10 pounds again when I went back into chemo. But I've been out of chemo this time for 3 months now and am now just 7 pounds over my pre-cancer weight. I've been trying to stop eating everything in sight, but a big part of me still thinks "Life is short; have the cheesecake!". From the surgery I just don't think my belly will ever be flat again, even if by some miracle I can lose those extra pounds. (And of course my oncologists don't WANT me to lose any weight! But they're not the ones trying to squeeze into my clothes.) For my upcoming cruise I bought some great tummy-control pants and 3 ShapeFX swimsuits that have a hidden panel inside that hold your belly flat. I can't TELL you how much BETTER that makes me feel! And the little 1/4" of hair on my head and having brows and lashes again is also doing wonders for my self-esteem. I don't feel sexy, but I don't feel hideous either. I remember last time I had hair that I felt 100% sexier and more confident when I was finally able to get my hair colored & highlighted and cut into something that almost resembled a 'style' (abeit a very SHORT style!)

I don't know what to think about the hot flashes. I don't THINK I have them but I know I can't BEAR to have a wig on if it's at all hot outside, so maybe I do have some of that without thinking about it.

froggy1

lindaprocopio said:

My initial chemo round ended Match 26, 2009!! (a yr to the day!)
Funny that your chemo ended 1 year to the day that my initial carbo/taxol rounds ended! HA!

Both times I was bald I felt unattractive and undesirable. I gained 15 pounds with my 1st chemo protocol, lost 8 of that with radiation, then gained 10 pounds again when I went back into chemo. But I've been out of chemo this time for 3 months now and am now just 7 pounds over my pre-cancer weight. I've been trying to stop eating everything in sight, but a big part of me still thinks "Life is short; have the cheesecake!". From the surgery I just don't think my belly will ever be flat again, even if by some miracle I can lose those extra pounds. (And of course my oncologists don't WANT me to lose any weight! But they're not the ones trying to squeeze into my clothes.) For my upcoming cruise I bought some great tummy-control pants and 3 ShapeFX swimsuits that have a hidden panel inside that hold your belly flat. I can't TELL you how much BETTER that makes me feel! And the little 1/4" of hair on my head and having brows and lashes again is also doing wonders for my self-esteem. I don't feel sexy, but I don't feel hideous either. I remember last time I had hair that I felt 100% sexier and more confident when I was finally able to get my hair colored & highlighted and cut into something that almost resembled a 'style' (abeit a very SHORT style!)

I don't know what to think about the hot flashes. I don't THINK I have them but I know I can't BEAR to have a wig on if it's at all hot outside, so maybe I do have some of that without thinking about it.

Linda
'Love your picture. Is that your hair now or an old pic? You look SO cute.
I was diagnosed 9/08 and just started going without my wig. Wow, it feels good. My hair is kind of like cotton candy, but looks presentable. At time, I forget I'm not "normal." LOL

Take care, Ginny

froggy1

Hissy_Fitz said:

I lost a ton of weight
I lost a ton of weight post-surgery....about 40 pounds. I have gained it all back but I could not believe how HARD it was to stop the weight loss. I felt like I was eating all the time, just trying to keep up.

My last chemo session, there was a near-skeletal woman across from me who had already had a feeding tube put in place, but she would not use it, evidently. The staff got her doctor to come over and give her a long "talking to", during which the doctor mentioned that it takes at least 1800 calories a day for a chemo patient to maintain his/her weight. So maybe your body just got used to those extra calories and now it still "wants" them.

My libido runs hot and cold. But it did that before Cancer. And the whole bald thing freaks me out, too. Sex with a bald woman cannot be any man's idea of a dream date.

I have never had a hot flash. Not during memopause, not after surgery....never. And I am so cold-natured, I was really hoping for them, dang it.

Carlene

Weight
The weight thing is a mystery to me. Based on what I wasn't eating during my bowel obstruction and chemo, I should be a size 2! BUT, it didn't happen. I see all these skinny women and I seem to be the exception in the chemo room. Then again, I'm not fond of the skeleton look. Go figure..'has to be the old metabolism thing. (I didn't get a good draw.)

Take care,
Ginny

arbor3

WEIGHT GAIN
I was dx in Aug 2006, went through all the normal stuff. Weight stayed pretty normal, then the Dr put me on Doxil last May 2009. I gained 25 pounds very fast, but I was not eating anymore, had to buy new clothes also. Asked my OB/GYN because I had never weighted that much, he said do not worry about gain it would be worse for my health to go on diet. Over the winter I have lost the weight gain and have put away by big clothes and got out my old ones. The Dr never gave me a reason why I gained the weight. I think it was the Doxil and then Gemzar Chemos. After the Gemzar the Dr put me on Topotocan and then I started to lose the weight.

Hang in there it will come off, but you also need a good balanced diet to fight this thing called Cancer.

HUGS!!!!!!!!!!!!Dinora

Tina Brown

arbor3 said:

WEIGHT GAIN
I was dx in Aug 2006, went through all the normal stuff. Weight stayed pretty normal, then the Dr put me on Doxil last May 2009. I gained 25 pounds very fast, but I was not eating anymore, had to buy new clothes also. Asked my OB/GYN because I had never weighted that much, he said do not worry about gain it would be worse for my health to go on diet. Over the winter I have lost the weight gain and have put away by big clothes and got out my old ones. The Dr never gave me a reason why I gained the weight. I think it was the Doxil and then Gemzar Chemos. After the Gemzar the Dr put me on Topotocan and then I started to lose the weight.

Hang in there it will come off, but you also need a good balanced diet to fight this thing called Cancer.

HUGS!!!!!!!!!!!!Dinora

Thank-you for all your
Thank-you for all your comments. I have kinda come to terms with the fact that I am still here and the things I have talked about are nothing compared to the fact that I AM STILL HERE. I will just carry on trying to get better and stronger from the chemo. I accept that my life is fowever changed and I have to accept a different normal now. Would like to be attractive and desirable again - but hey ho, I am STILL HERE.

Love to you all Tina xxxxx

Lisa13Q

Tina Brown said:

Thank-you for all your
Thank-you for all your comments. I have kinda come to terms with the fact that I am still here and the things I have talked about are nothing compared to the fact that I AM STILL HERE. I will just carry on trying to get better and stronger from the chemo. I accept that my life is fowever changed and I have to accept a different normal now. Would like to be attractive and desirable again - but hey ho, I am STILL HERE.

Love to you all Tina xxxxx

I think you're HOT..
NOt that you care, but it's true baby!!!

JoanC

Tina Brown said:

Thank-you for all your
Thank-you for all your comments. I have kinda come to terms with the fact that I am still here and the things I have talked about are nothing compared to the fact that I AM STILL HERE. I will just carry on trying to get better and stronger from the chemo. I accept that my life is fowever changed and I have to accept a different normal now. Would like to be attractive and desirable again - but hey ho, I am STILL HERE.

Love to you all Tina xxxxx

You are beautiful
Tina,
Hair, no hair, scars, no scars ....beauty is from within.....as anyone who loves you will tell you.I am telling you....you are beautiful!
(((HUG)))

MK_4Dani

I am 12 weeks post chemo:
I gained weight and said the heck with it and bought a new wardrobe: all in a larger size. I figure this cancer battle may require me to have a range of sizes in clothes..I want to be prepared. It was fun and retail therapy is always good for a lady! I am eating healthy so I figure my body will determine where I need to be.

Sex drive: zero, nothing. I don't worry about that either. Hubby is a little worried but he can figure that out himself.

Hot flashes: every day, they are annoying but manageable.

You are "chemo normal"!

Cool Story: I went to a horse show with my daughter last week. It was 90 degrees and humid so I wasn't about to wear a wig. I was feeling a bit self conscious until a woman ask me if I was a cancer survivor. I smile and said yes...She was a cancer survivor also. This exchange made my day and I was no longer self conscious. With my fuzzy hair I made a new friend with an instant connection! I also learned it is OK to reach out to someone because THEY might be feeling like I was: out of place. I learned something that day.

XXX000,
Mary

Tina Brown

MK_4Dani said:

I am 12 weeks post chemo:
I gained weight and said the heck with it and bought a new wardrobe: all in a larger size. I figure this cancer battle may require me to have a range of sizes in clothes..I want to be prepared. It was fun and retail therapy is always good for a lady! I am eating healthy so I figure my body will determine where I need to be.

Sex drive: zero, nothing. I don't worry about that either. Hubby is a little worried but he can figure that out himself.

Hot flashes: every day, they are annoying but manageable.

You are "chemo normal"!

Cool Story: I went to a horse show with my daughter last week. It was 90 degrees and humid so I wasn't about to wear a wig. I was feeling a bit self conscious until a woman ask me if I was a cancer survivor. I smile and said yes...She was a cancer survivor also. This exchange made my day and I was no longer self conscious. With my fuzzy hair I made a new friend with an instant connection! I also learned it is OK to reach out to someone because THEY might be feeling like I was: out of place. I learned something that day.

XXX000,
Mary

Thank-you Mary
Thank-you Mary, your post is so reassuring. I can't believe I feel happy to be "chemo normal" but I am

I have started swimming and of course I go in the water "commando" (no wig or scarf) I am aware of people looking at me, especially children. Strangly it doesn't bother me. I often forget as well. One lady said to me "You look like Jade Goody (a celebrity in the UK who died of cervical cancer)but much prettier" I think it takes courage on other people's part to approach you & begin a conversation about your illness. I have many friends who have no idea how to talk to me about my cancer, but that's OK, I understand how hard it is for other people.

As the warmer weather gets here I will be going out "commando" as my hair is growing back - slowly

Take care everyone Tina xx