I hate to post this but I have to get it out

Pghmomma
Pghmomma Member Posts: 141
edited March 2014 in Esophageal Cancer #1
So dad has been doing well, he remains sadated and stable, but critical. The dr spoke with us today and said the only thing in his favor right now is his heart. His kidneys already shut down and he is on dialiyias. His liver is a bit elevated. His plates are in the 60's. His mouth is bleeding and they are unsure if its from the platlets or from his liver. He is still vented and is having trouble exhausting the co2 from his body, since his lungs are bad and cant exhale is building up. But they are trying to fix that. The suergons are going to be speaking with us in the next day or two.

I am just sooooo upset, I feel that we wouldnt be in this spot if the dr's at shadyside would have listened to us by the 4th day. But they chose not too.

Im such a daddy's little girl this is just too hard for me to deal with, my poor mother I cant began to think what she feels like. My dad is only 56 and has soo much more life in there, I cant give up hope and prayers. I just need so much support right now and hope.

They say that ARDS is not a easy thing to over come, but EC isnt either and he beat EC like a pro!

God bless,
Tina

Comments

  • K_ann1015
    K_ann1015 Member Posts: 500
    #2
    OH TINA.....
    it all seems so
    OH TINA.....
    it all seems so unfair...your dad is so young. Just know that somehow he is in God's loving care--even though it doesn't seem like it right now. (His ways are not our ways.) I will keep him, you and your mom in our fervent prayers.

    I think it is important that you do post---to vent---then you can go back to your mom and dad, with a little less frustration---because you just let a little of it go here on csn! They need you and are lucky to have such a caring daughter.
    know that your csn family is here to hold you up if you fall or feel "weak"--
    much love & prayers being sent your way...
    Kim
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #3
    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • MOE58
    MOE58 Member Posts: 589 Member
    #4
    OH TINA HANG ON
    Tina,

    Its okay to cry we all have cried on this site, yes its hard to think the worse, especially being a daddys girl I was too, and I fought harder on my dad and his health than I did for mother, I was never ever close to my mother, but my daddy well I could go to him for anything and I didn't have to worry one bit after the conversation. I knew everything would be fine. He has been gone 5 years and its still very very hard for me. Fortunately I had my father till he was 77 years old, but all his health issues all started at the age of 55 so I can feel your pain.

    yes I agree I think the problem started at the other hospital, and if they would have listened to you and the family he wouldn't be where he is at today.

    Just know we are here, and let him know everyday that you are there holding his hand.

    Tina, I don't want to scare you but him knowing you are a daddy's girl is the reason, he isn't giving up, I had to walk in my daddy's hospital room, and tell him it would be okay and he could go within 48 hours I lost my father to GOD, but i knew he was in a better place of comfort, and no pain or sorrow, and his home was much greater than his home on earth.

    You know we all are here for you, but you have to do what your dad would want you to do and ask yourself these quesitons: Would daddy just want to lay there? Would he just want us to come everyday and see him this way? would Daddy be better off doing something else? questions like this.

    I will say its not an easy situation and there is never the right words or advice anybody can give you its what the family wants to do.

    If I can help please let me know.

    Love and hugs
    Lori
  • Donna70
    Donna70 Member Posts: 852 Member
    #5
    MOE58 said:

    OH TINA HANG ON
    Tina,

    Its okay to cry we all have cried on this site, yes its hard to think the worse, especially being a daddys girl I was too, and I fought harder on my dad and his health than I did for mother, I was never ever close to my mother, but my daddy well I could go to him for anything and I didn't have to worry one bit after the conversation. I knew everything would be fine. He has been gone 5 years and its still very very hard for me. Fortunately I had my father till he was 77 years old, but all his health issues all started at the age of 55 so I can feel your pain.

    yes I agree I think the problem started at the other hospital, and if they would have listened to you and the family he wouldn't be where he is at today.

    Just know we are here, and let him know everyday that you are there holding his hand.

    Tina, I don't want to scare you but him knowing you are a daddy's girl is the reason, he isn't giving up, I had to walk in my daddy's hospital room, and tell him it would be okay and he could go within 48 hours I lost my father to GOD, but i knew he was in a better place of comfort, and no pain or sorrow, and his home was much greater than his home on earth.

    You know we all are here for you, but you have to do what your dad would want you to do and ask yourself these quesitons: Would daddy just want to lay there? Would he just want us to come everyday and see him this way? would Daddy be better off doing something else? questions like this.

    I will say its not an easy situation and there is never the right words or advice anybody can give you its what the family wants to do.

    If I can help please let me know.

    Love and hugs
    Lori

    Tina, prayers coming
    Hi,
    Tina, it is hard to think that maybe if the drs at the first place listened your Dad may not be in the situation he is now. So vent as much as you want. Now you are in this place and your father is at this stage so you can support him and tell him all that you have in your heart. I wish it were a better situation. I think Lori might have the answer about letting go. Your Dad has a strong heart and is so young, this is all the more difficult. I was a Daddy's little girl too and spent my Dad's last day sitting with him, he was semi conscious, singing and talking. The nurses wanted me to go home but I stayed with him till he left to go Home. We are all praying and supporting you. Prayers always, hugs from a distance.
    Donna70
  • cjmac49
    cjmac49 Member Posts: 100
    #6
    Venting
    Vent as much as you want here. We can help you so you can be strong for Dad and Mom. We'll pray for you all.

    Jim
  • unclaw2002
    unclaw2002 Member Posts: 599
    #7
    Tina,
    I feel your pain with
    Tina,

    I feel your pain with every word you write. Don't worry post and vent. Sometimes it is the only thing that will make it possible to go in to your dad and mom with a smile on your face.

    Prayers and hugs to you.

    Cindy
  • Lylesmyprince
    Lylesmyprince Member Posts: 130
    #8
    Tina
    Oh girl...praying for you and your family! I understand dialysis...and though it is scarey at first...a person adjusts to it. If your dad's kidneys begin to function again...great!!...if not...I'm happy to answer any questions you might have about it. Lyle has been a dialysis patient for nearly 3 years now. Now..EC, too. Tonight was the first time that someone told me that the CO2 is a bit high in his blood test. I'm not sure what that means...but will do some research. Try to keep your chin up!! Being Daddy's little girl is a very special thing...love on him much and file away every memory as a snapshot in your mind.

    Hugs,
    Susie
  • mumphy
    mumphy Member Posts: 440
    #9
    Lylesmyprince said:

    Tina
    Oh girl...praying for you and your family! I understand dialysis...and though it is scarey at first...a person adjusts to it. If your dad's kidneys begin to function again...great!!...if not...I'm happy to answer any questions you might have about it. Lyle has been a dialysis patient for nearly 3 years now. Now..EC, too. Tonight was the first time that someone told me that the CO2 is a bit high in his blood test. I'm not sure what that means...but will do some research. Try to keep your chin up!! Being Daddy's little girl is a very special thing...love on him much and file away every memory as a snapshot in your mind.

    Hugs,
    Susie

    VENT AWAY!!!
    Hey Tina,

    Know that you and yours are always in my prayers. VENT AWAY BABY THAT'S ONE OF THE REASONS TO COME HER. I AM SENDNG YOU A GIANT(((((HUG)))).

    CALL ME I WILL SEND YOU MY PHONE # ON PRIVATE E-MAIL.


    GOD BLESS,
    KATH
  • Tina Blondek
    Tina Blondek Member Posts: 1,500 Member
    #10
    God Bless all of You
    Hi Tina my friend,
    I have been thinking about all of you so much. Yes, I agree, please do come here to vent, cry, rejoice, update, whatever and whenever. It is very helpful for you to get this all out of your mind. Think of this site as having your own personal journal. You will feel somewhat better after you write it all down. I also agree with Lori, I too was a Daddy's Little Girl, once I told my dad it was ok for him to go, that he had my blessing, on Tuesday afternoon, he passed away Tuesday night. I was not there at that time, but I have been told it was a good thing I was not, because if I were, he probably would have kept holding on. You have to look at your dad's quality of life....does he have one anymore? Do you think he wants to be bed ridden? Relying on everyone to take care of him? Do you think he wants all of these pains? All of this suffering? Of course not...neither did I, that is why I had to give my dad my blessing. I had to respect his decision to give up. Just think this over. Discuss it with your mom and your family. I will continue to be thinking of you. You are all heavy on my mind.
    Prayers and hugs go out to you. Let us know how he is doing whenever you get the chance.

    Love,
    Tina xo

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