Caregivers
I am sure all have seen something similar in the people that love you and who are close to your situation. I have told my wife she has the hardest job in all of this and I believe that. I have the ability to fight this, I am certainly more in control(if one fancies the notion of control) of the situation then she is. She can "only" watch and support me and God and I both know she has done a wonderful job of that.
So I wanted to take a moment and say thank you and bless you to all of those people out there who like my wife provide so much for us. The sacrifices you make, the support you give, the tolerance shown...the list of what you provide for us physicaly emotionaly, and spiritualy is immeasurable. They are but simple words but they are heartfelt. THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!
And for my wife:
"Nothing that I am able to give to you do I find worthy of you, and only in this way do I discover that I am a poor man. And so I give to you the only thing that I possess-myself"
Aeschines
Comments
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Hey Greybeard, if it weren't for my girlfriend, my sole
caregiver, I wouldn;t be here ,as my brother and sister deserted me, as did a "friend" of over thirty years (damn!~ I aint contagious!). Without her,my girlfriend of about fifteen years, it wouldn't matter to me if I lived or died but I can't leave her alone so thats my incentive (or a major one) to win this battle (to piss on the graves of my siblings -I'm the oldest) is another incentive)...I can;t see anyone waging this battle totally without help. There were so many days/nights where I could not take care of myself at all. WE should salute all caregivers for as my GF has often said:"I feel your pain as much as you do"...steve
PS: I see by your attire you like riding tricycles....0 -
tricycles?! lolcoloCan said:Hey Greybeard, if it weren't for my girlfriend, my sole
caregiver, I wouldn;t be here ,as my brother and sister deserted me, as did a "friend" of over thirty years (damn!~ I aint contagious!). Without her,my girlfriend of about fifteen years, it wouldn't matter to me if I lived or died but I can't leave her alone so thats my incentive (or a major one) to win this battle (to piss on the graves of my siblings -I'm the oldest) is another incentive)...I can;t see anyone waging this battle totally without help. There were so many days/nights where I could not take care of myself at all. WE should salute all caregivers for as my GF has often said:"I feel your pain as much as you do"...steve
PS: I see by your attire you like riding tricycles....
Actually still on two but after the last surgery was thinking I might have to "Trike" the bike. not yet though. Glad you have such a person in your life as your GF!0 -
so am Igreybeard64 said:tricycles?! lol
Actually still on two but after the last surgery was thinking I might have to "Trike" the bike. not yet though. Glad you have such a person in your life as your GF!
Glad you took the "tricycle" comment in the way it was meant--to get a laugh. There's a bunch of reasons we can't marry (I'd never be able to afford her psych meds--she's a product of child and spousal abuse -big time-that you usually only read about and on several times in the past did some real nasty tings tome but now,as I've said, I'd be dead without her.
Your wife provides the same support for you (checked out your photos---don't know how to do that-aint too computer literate)(I lost my arms and everything else tho starting to regain weight and once chemo ends-if it ever does-I plan on going full blast again with my weights)....Glad to communicate witrh ya.....steve0 -
GraybeardcoloCan said:so am I
Glad you took the "tricycle" comment in the way it was meant--to get a laugh. There's a bunch of reasons we can't marry (I'd never be able to afford her psych meds--she's a product of child and spousal abuse -big time-that you usually only read about and on several times in the past did some real nasty tings tome but now,as I've said, I'd be dead without her.
Your wife provides the same support for you (checked out your photos---don't know how to do that-aint too computer literate)(I lost my arms and everything else tho starting to regain weight and once chemo ends-if it ever does-I plan on going full blast again with my weights)....Glad to communicate witrh ya.....steve
I would of done anything i could for my husband thats the way us wifes are when it comes to our man. I am sorry you have colon cancer it was hard for my husband, he loved his food and beer and his harley. Things didn't work out for him and i am truely sorry been married 35 yrs its really hard for me but i will survive i live in phx and i might go to the bike week might see you there take care and know this is a good place to come.
michelle0 -
So sorryangelsbaby said:Graybeard
I would of done anything i could for my husband thats the way us wifes are when it comes to our man. I am sorry you have colon cancer it was hard for my husband, he loved his food and beer and his harley. Things didn't work out for him and i am truely sorry been married 35 yrs its really hard for me but i will survive i live in phx and i might go to the bike week might see you there take care and know this is a good place to come.
michelle
I am so sorry about your husband, from your pic I think we would have enjoyed a beer together. I hope you find peace in your time.
As for Bike week in Phoenix we wont be attending as we have moved back home to Illinois. I did get the e-mail about it not to long ago made me wish I was there as it was 20 something degrees here when I got it. We are right outside of St. Louis. I was born in STL and the wife from a little town north of there on the Illinois side. We were in phoenix while the Wife was doing the travel nurse gig. Between my cancer and the grandkids we thought we should get ourselves back home so to speak. I wish we could meet you there that would have been nice. Take care of yourself, and send me a note anytime you like.0 -
weight losscoloCan said:so am I
Glad you took the "tricycle" comment in the way it was meant--to get a laugh. There's a bunch of reasons we can't marry (I'd never be able to afford her psych meds--she's a product of child and spousal abuse -big time-that you usually only read about and on several times in the past did some real nasty tings tome but now,as I've said, I'd be dead without her.
Your wife provides the same support for you (checked out your photos---don't know how to do that-aint too computer literate)(I lost my arms and everything else tho starting to regain weight and once chemo ends-if it ever does-I plan on going full blast again with my weights)....Glad to communicate witrh ya.....steve
Oh lord can i relate to the weight loss. I went from 182lbs and in decent shape to under 120 and zero strength. It is gradually coming back. As for your girl friends history, I am sure sorry she had to go through that and unfortunately it does leave scars, maybe you are as good for her as she is for you? Team work brother.
Your strength will come back, dont get to disgusted the first time you grab those weights though I was amazed at how quickly it had all went away.
good luck to you, and your girlfriend.
chris0 -
greybeard
I loved reading this. I too feel very fortunate in that I have a husband of almost 38 yrs. who has stood by me and helped me to keep focused on important matters. He is clumsy in a hospital setting and doesn't know how to handle illness but I have to love him for trying and sticking close.
Loved the pictures!
-Pat0 -
I went from 178 to about 135 and first things to disappeargreybeard64 said:weight loss
Oh lord can i relate to the weight loss. I went from 182lbs and in decent shape to under 120 and zero strength. It is gradually coming back. As for your girl friends history, I am sure sorry she had to go through that and unfortunately it does leave scars, maybe you are as good for her as she is for you? Team work brother.
Your strength will come back, dont get to disgusted the first time you grab those weights though I was amazed at how quickly it had all went away.
good luck to you, and your girlfriend.
chris
were my muscles......Now I'm 161, been doing partial to full bodyweight squats and leg raises and light DBs with right hand only for about a month now; will use left arm once-if ever-picc gets removed after chemo ceases.Feel kinda naked without them (muscles, that is, not picc); they provided a security blanket knowing what I could do if provoked to defend myself.Started lifting as a teen; restarting as I push 60. There is a such thing as "muscle Memory" and it feels as if my body is just waiting to go all out.When I ready to do so I'll ask colostomates who lift specific questionbs as I don't want to ruin my surgeon's masterpiece.
Enjoy whats left of the day, Chris and everyone else if reading this......steve0 -
Pat, I think its fair to say we'd all be lostJaylo969 said:greybeard
I loved reading this. I too feel very fortunate in that I have a husband of almost 38 yrs. who has stood by me and helped me to keep focused on important matters. He is clumsy in a hospital setting and doesn't know how to handle illness but I have to love him for trying and sticking close.
Loved the pictures!
-Pat
without our caregivers, who, like us, are oftentimes overwhelmed by what they're facing. There's no ring or piece of paper compelling my GF to stay with me, thru better or worse, in sickness or in health yet here she is, like your spouse and so many others who care for us when we can't do for ourselves---
A(in my case liquorless) toast to our caregivers......steve0 -
Steve when friends desert youcoloCan said:Hey Greybeard, if it weren't for my girlfriend, my sole
caregiver, I wouldn;t be here ,as my brother and sister deserted me, as did a "friend" of over thirty years (damn!~ I aint contagious!). Without her,my girlfriend of about fifteen years, it wouldn't matter to me if I lived or died but I can't leave her alone so thats my incentive (or a major one) to win this battle (to piss on the graves of my siblings -I'm the oldest) is another incentive)...I can;t see anyone waging this battle totally without help. There were so many days/nights where I could not take care of myself at all. WE should salute all caregivers for as my GF has often said:"I feel your pain as much as you do"...steve
PS: I see by your attire you like riding tricycles....
shake the dust. They never were friends to begin with, just users. The day after my surgery a 'friend' of ours since '72 called me in the hospital. I was in some serious pain, in shock that I'd just had a huge cancer removed from my body, and he calls and gives me his version of the last rites.Didn't say "I'm sorry you are sick,can I help". Just basically said go ahead and die.
I've noticed that many friends and acquaintances just disappeared when they found out I had cancer.Like you said Steve, it is not contagious!Some of them hurriedly say "I'm putting you on my prayer list"...none have called to see if their prayers have been answered.
People are funny that way
-Pat0 -
"friends" who leaveJaylo969 said:greybeard
I loved reading this. I too feel very fortunate in that I have a husband of almost 38 yrs. who has stood by me and helped me to keep focused on important matters. He is clumsy in a hospital setting and doesn't know how to handle illness but I have to love him for trying and sticking close.
Loved the pictures!
-Pat
It is strange how some people react to this isnt it. I also have friends that dissapeared, I have friends that I wish would dissapear, and some that try so hard but are at a loss as to how to react. I feel sorry for the latter. A good friend of mine for many years is one of those, he just doesnt know what to do with me, or himself. I told my wife the first time he saw me after I was diagnosed he looked like a deer caught in the headlights, Hell I felt bad for him, lol. I think in general guys have a harder time as far as know ing what to say or do. The way most of us were raised was to bury the emotional things and it is hard to undo that. He is a good guy and would do anything I ask of him still, but he sure doenst know how to handle this. I try to keep him in mind when people I know do something that makes me think "What the &$#@! BUT, Jaylo, what a horrible phone call that must have been!! And bless your "clumsy" husband it is a tough row to hoe, and congrats on 38 years!0 -
Friendsgreybeard64 said:"friends" who leave
It is strange how some people react to this isnt it. I also have friends that dissapeared, I have friends that I wish would dissapear, and some that try so hard but are at a loss as to how to react. I feel sorry for the latter. A good friend of mine for many years is one of those, he just doesnt know what to do with me, or himself. I told my wife the first time he saw me after I was diagnosed he looked like a deer caught in the headlights, Hell I felt bad for him, lol. I think in general guys have a harder time as far as know ing what to say or do. The way most of us were raised was to bury the emotional things and it is hard to undo that. He is a good guy and would do anything I ask of him still, but he sure doenst know how to handle this. I try to keep him in mind when people I know do something that makes me think "What the &$#@! BUT, Jaylo, what a horrible phone call that must have been!! And bless your "clumsy" husband it is a tough row to hoe, and congrats on 38 years!
I'll have to say that I have some wonderful friends who have stuck by my side since I was diagnosed on November 3, 2009, and had my surgery two days later. (I have stage II colon cancer, and am currently on folfox and have had 7 of 12 treatments) Most have been very supportive. As you can see by my screen name, I have something to do with dancing. I have taught C&W, Ballroom, Latin & Swing dancing for over 20 years. I haven't done much teaching lately, but I am fortunate enough to belong to two different organizations that I travel for, and judge dance events. I have had to miss a few, but am ecstatic when I get to go. Most of the people come right up to me. I've also had those who don't know me extremely well, come over and share stories of either theirs, or a loved ones cancer. They all keep me going with emails, calls & texts. There are very few people who don't approach me, or don't know what to say. I do find that they are all men. They seem suncomfortable with the situation.
I also have a wonderful caregiver! His name is Daniel, and we have been together almost two years. I had a really hard time telling him I had cancer. We had been together just a litle over a year at that point, and were living together. The bad thing was that he had just lost his mom to cancer in May 2009. His father died of cancer also, about 15 years ago or so. It was the hardest thing I have had to tell him. hen I did, I told him that if he wanted to leave at that point, I would not blame him. Thankfully, he stayed, and is still by my side today.
I will have to say that it is hard on him when I am in the hospital. He hates it, as the last time he saw both of his parents, when they were in the hospital with cancer. He does not sleep well, and does not take care of himself when I am in there. It makes me feel good that he cares so much, but terrifies me at te same time, that he is not taking care of himself. I have come to rely on some close friends to be his caregiver, when I am in there.
I am new to this forum, and am so glad that I have found all of you! I now feel I have another circle of support, and am extremely grateful!0 -
Hello dance5678dance said:Friends
I'll have to say that I have some wonderful friends who have stuck by my side since I was diagnosed on November 3, 2009, and had my surgery two days later. (I have stage II colon cancer, and am currently on folfox and have had 7 of 12 treatments) Most have been very supportive. As you can see by my screen name, I have something to do with dancing. I have taught C&W, Ballroom, Latin & Swing dancing for over 20 years. I haven't done much teaching lately, but I am fortunate enough to belong to two different organizations that I travel for, and judge dance events. I have had to miss a few, but am ecstatic when I get to go. Most of the people come right up to me. I've also had those who don't know me extremely well, come over and share stories of either theirs, or a loved ones cancer. They all keep me going with emails, calls & texts. There are very few people who don't approach me, or don't know what to say. I do find that they are all men. They seem suncomfortable with the situation.
I also have a wonderful caregiver! His name is Daniel, and we have been together almost two years. I had a really hard time telling him I had cancer. We had been together just a litle over a year at that point, and were living together. The bad thing was that he had just lost his mom to cancer in May 2009. His father died of cancer also, about 15 years ago or so. It was the hardest thing I have had to tell him. hen I did, I told him that if he wanted to leave at that point, I would not blame him. Thankfully, he stayed, and is still by my side today.
I will have to say that it is hard on him when I am in the hospital. He hates it, as the last time he saw both of his parents, when they were in the hospital with cancer. He does not sleep well, and does not take care of himself when I am in there. It makes me feel good that he cares so much, but terrifies me at te same time, that he is not taking care of himself. I have come to rely on some close friends to be his caregiver, when I am in there.
I am new to this forum, and am so glad that I have found all of you! I now feel I have another circle of support, and am extremely grateful!
Glad to meet you and very, very glad your friends are true blues and support you.
You & I were almost hand in hand w/diagnosis and surgery.I was dx'd on Oct.19th and surgery on 20th...2009. Was in hospital 13 days waiting on my newly resected colon ( named Larry ) to wake up and produce. Then incision got infected.Started chemo Dec.8th.I am in my 7th treatment also.I am good now though, and thankful to be alive and kicking!
Glad you found this support group. I didn't find it until end of January...wish I had found it sooner. Sure could have used some support before that first chemo
-Pat0 -
Hey Greybeard!robinvan said:So True!
I've been at this for nearly 6 years. Pam has been with me every step. She has suffered in many ways that I have not.
Great Pictures BTW.
Be well... Rob; in Vancouver
I love that handle! I know what you mean about our caregivers, we love 'em to pieces. My hubby took an early layoff in October (he does highway construction) and they get laid off anyway in November just to care for me. I was in the hospital last year with so many surgeries, and he's been there every step of the way. My kids as well, I know it's harder for them to watch then they let on, but they make they are there for me. I love my family.
My friends are down to one! I only have like one person that even calls me anymore, my best friend in Virginia, who I can talk too, without her even mentioning cancer..she talks to me like she always has, treats me normal, and comes to see me when she's not working. My friends around town here, don't even bother with me anymore, they see me in Walmart, or the mall, and they'll put their heads down, and just say a little "hi" then I see them in a group and you know they're all talking about you...I used to be involved in their school plays, PTA, threw parties for the kids, always baked stuff for the kids, and now they don't even ask if I want to be a part of anything anymore. It's sad, but it shows you who your real friends are, that's for sure.
I'm still happy though, I Have my kids, and still do community theater, which I shouldn't disclude, they are my family as well, lots of scattered brain, fun people there, and I fit right in! been acting on stage with kids for quite a few years now, but we love it.
I LOVE your bike by the way, my hubby is jealous now! HAHA! he's wanted one so bad for such a long time, but can never afford it.
Hope all goes well in your journey! we're here for you!
Hugsss!
~Donna0 -
"2"Shayenne said:Hey Greybeard!
I love that handle! I know what you mean about our caregivers, we love 'em to pieces. My hubby took an early layoff in October (he does highway construction) and they get laid off anyway in November just to care for me. I was in the hospital last year with so many surgeries, and he's been there every step of the way. My kids as well, I know it's harder for them to watch then they let on, but they make they are there for me. I love my family.
My friends are down to one! I only have like one person that even calls me anymore, my best friend in Virginia, who I can talk too, without her even mentioning cancer..she talks to me like she always has, treats me normal, and comes to see me when she's not working. My friends around town here, don't even bother with me anymore, they see me in Walmart, or the mall, and they'll put their heads down, and just say a little "hi" then I see them in a group and you know they're all talking about you...I used to be involved in their school plays, PTA, threw parties for the kids, always baked stuff for the kids, and now they don't even ask if I want to be a part of anything anymore. It's sad, but it shows you who your real friends are, that's for sure.
I'm still happy though, I Have my kids, and still do community theater, which I shouldn't disclude, they are my family as well, lots of scattered brain, fun people there, and I fit right in! been acting on stage with kids for quite a few years now, but we love it.
I LOVE your bike by the way, my hubby is jealous now! HAHA! he's wanted one so bad for such a long time, but can never afford it.
Hope all goes well in your journey! we're here for you!
Hugsss!
~Donna
~Lion0 -
GB
Our CareGivers pay a heavy price and sometimes the "ultimate" price should the worst befall us in our battles.
There are probably not enough "thanks" to go around for all that they do - all that they endure - all that they feel - all that they experience - all that they accomplish.
Your description of your wife slumping in your pictures struck a real chord with me. This past decade 2000-2010 has beaten the literal life out of my wife. It all started with an F-3 tornado on March 28, 2000, that wiped out neighborhood and could have killed us and many of my neighbors. Cancer was already in me too, but 4 years away from diagnosis (another story).
Once the cancer landed, these past 6-years have been very hard on us - but I feel especially hard on her. I've seen that fear in her eyes whenever I went to surgery.
One night I overheard her talking to her sister (who is a nurse) and I'll never forget her words, "When do you think Craig will die." That hurt me, in the fact, that I knew then that I was causing her pain and she was scared and contemplating her life without me. That memory resonates in me still.
And she cried one time, before my lung surgery, when we were laying in bed and I actually did the right thing and just held her and told her that nothing will get me - I'll be Ok. It seemed to help. I let her get her fears out and played my role in trying to alleviate her fears and calming her down.
Now, what is significant about this? Well, first, my wife and I are not ones who talk about this. I have tried to have talks with her in the past, but she is one that does not do well with it. There is a part of her that she must feel she just could not handle - the acknowledgement and recognitiion of such a life changing event.
When I was first diagnosed, the onc (he was a candid guy) told her to "treat him like the same ol' a$$hole he was before he got cancer." Boy, did she listen to that, LOL:)
But seriously, she has done so much for me and I know I've taken her for granted on more than one occasion. Our entire life has not been a picnic at all - and Cancer aside, I sometimes feel like she would have been better off with another man.
I hope to be able to give her a better life some day and ease her burdens. She is a tireless worker and is deserving of some of the good things that life can offer her.
I've always mentioned the CareGivers in my posts and regard each of you with the highest esteem that I can give you. You are the "straw that stirs the drink."
Take it easy, GB. BTW, nice meeting you and thanks for your reply on my recent post - you seem like one of the "good guys" too...I am honored by your words.
I was born in 1961, so we're brothers of the '60's - man, those were the golden years as kids, huh? The best times of my life were between 1964-1969, wish I had a time machine to go back and live it again sometimes.
And...see your big on bikes...our golden retirever is named..."Harley."
I'll be seeing you around!
-Craig0 -
thx CraigSundanceh said:GB
Our CareGivers pay a heavy price and sometimes the "ultimate" price should the worst befall us in our battles.
There are probably not enough "thanks" to go around for all that they do - all that they endure - all that they feel - all that they experience - all that they accomplish.
Your description of your wife slumping in your pictures struck a real chord with me. This past decade 2000-2010 has beaten the literal life out of my wife. It all started with an F-3 tornado on March 28, 2000, that wiped out neighborhood and could have killed us and many of my neighbors. Cancer was already in me too, but 4 years away from diagnosis (another story).
Once the cancer landed, these past 6-years have been very hard on us - but I feel especially hard on her. I've seen that fear in her eyes whenever I went to surgery.
One night I overheard her talking to her sister (who is a nurse) and I'll never forget her words, "When do you think Craig will die." That hurt me, in the fact, that I knew then that I was causing her pain and she was scared and contemplating her life without me. That memory resonates in me still.
And she cried one time, before my lung surgery, when we were laying in bed and I actually did the right thing and just held her and told her that nothing will get me - I'll be Ok. It seemed to help. I let her get her fears out and played my role in trying to alleviate her fears and calming her down.
Now, what is significant about this? Well, first, my wife and I are not ones who talk about this. I have tried to have talks with her in the past, but she is one that does not do well with it. There is a part of her that she must feel she just could not handle - the acknowledgement and recognitiion of such a life changing event.
When I was first diagnosed, the onc (he was a candid guy) told her to "treat him like the same ol' a$$hole he was before he got cancer." Boy, did she listen to that, LOL:)
But seriously, she has done so much for me and I know I've taken her for granted on more than one occasion. Our entire life has not been a picnic at all - and Cancer aside, I sometimes feel like she would have been better off with another man.
I hope to be able to give her a better life some day and ease her burdens. She is a tireless worker and is deserving of some of the good things that life can offer her.
I've always mentioned the CareGivers in my posts and regard each of you with the highest esteem that I can give you. You are the "straw that stirs the drink."
Take it easy, GB. BTW, nice meeting you and thanks for your reply on my recent post - you seem like one of the "good guys" too...I am honored by your words.
I was born in 1961, so we're brothers of the '60's - man, those were the golden years as kids, huh? The best times of my life were between 1964-1969, wish I had a time machine to go back and live it again sometimes.
And...see your big on bikes...our golden retirever is named..."Harley."
I'll be seeing you around!
-Craig
Like your comment on the 60's for me it was about 69 to 73 I guess, My older sisters husband had a '70 Road Runner, the power that thing had... they are still my fav..ahh memory lane!
"Harley" is great do you ride? I am currently in the process of rigging up a seat and harness for Otis the basset hound so when the wife isnt around I can take him out for a spin. He might not have the disposition for it though as he can get a bit anxious so we will see.
I understand the comment "she would have been better off with another man" and overhearing the conversation she had with her sister. It is so damn hard at times isnt it! My wife is a nurse, a bit different then your as she and I have talked alot about the what if even early on. The really negative feelings I have about this whole journey seem to center around what it has done to her, and the look on my daughters faces the first time they saw me after they found out. To think that you are causing people such pain is heart breaking. But it isnt the right way to think, YOU didnt go out and get cancer, cancer found you.It is the cancer that is causing them to feel that way, it isnt YOU. And because you feel the way you do about how it effects your wife is proof that even though this is a sh@%$y journey for her, your wife has been blessed to have you in her life. You are a caring person obviously and the love you give is a blessing to her. You are worthy, and I bet she knows it too!!
Take care of yourself and may you have many happy years to come with those you love.
chris (greybeard)0 -
Well Put Greybeard...........greybeard64 said:thx Craig
Like your comment on the 60's for me it was about 69 to 73 I guess, My older sisters husband had a '70 Road Runner, the power that thing had... they are still my fav..ahh memory lane!
"Harley" is great do you ride? I am currently in the process of rigging up a seat and harness for Otis the basset hound so when the wife isnt around I can take him out for a spin. He might not have the disposition for it though as he can get a bit anxious so we will see.
I understand the comment "she would have been better off with another man" and overhearing the conversation she had with her sister. It is so damn hard at times isnt it! My wife is a nurse, a bit different then your as she and I have talked alot about the what if even early on. The really negative feelings I have about this whole journey seem to center around what it has done to her, and the look on my daughters faces the first time they saw me after they found out. To think that you are causing people such pain is heart breaking. But it isnt the right way to think, YOU didnt go out and get cancer, cancer found you.It is the cancer that is causing them to feel that way, it isnt YOU. And because you feel the way you do about how it effects your wife is proof that even though this is a sh@%$y journey for her, your wife has been blessed to have you in her life. You are a caring person obviously and the love you give is a blessing to her. You are worthy, and I bet she knows it too!!
Take care of yourself and may you have many happy years to come with those you love.
chris (greybeard)
I never take my caregiver for granted..She is a Godsend for our whole family.......if they only knew how much..... again thanks...great read.......Buzz0 -
Thank God for caregivers ...
If it wasn't for my sweet wife, I'm sure I would be gone by now. My wife was dx with MS twenty years ago. It has progressed through the years to the point that she has been in a wheelchair for the past 3-1/2 years. Did that slow her down ? No way. I have a hard time keeping up with her. Those electric wheel chairs can move. If it wasn't for her and the people on this board, I would be lost.
As for friends, you sure find out who your real friends are when they find out you have the big "C". It was the same for my wife and MS. The same applies to co-workers. About two weeks after I was dx I called a small meeting of co-workers to explain what was going on with me. The rumors were getting out of control.
Anyway, THANK GOD FOR CAREGIVERS.
Cancer BLOWS.
John0
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