Not sure how to care for my husband

crose Member Posts: 9
edited March 2014 in Esophageal Cancer #1
My husband has had a long battle with EC...was diagnosed at stage IVa; the original chemo-radiation knocked it back, but it came back with a vengeance and spread to his liver and then brain. We had hopes of enrolling in a clinical trial, but this was before there was brain involvement, and that disqualified him. He has had no treatment since the brain tumor was removed, but somehow amazingly remains "optimistic" that he is going to beat this thing.
I am at a loss as to how to help him. I see him getting weaker every day. He is not keeping food down, even after having a stent placed in his esophagus.

When do you decide that hospice is appropriate?
How do I help him?

This is breaking my heart.


  • K_ann1015
    K_ann1015 Member Posts: 500
    so sorry for the difficulties...
    I am not an expert here---but usually the hospice folks are good at answering questions with out any judgment----they are used to people---because most have never been thru this before...

    Does he have a feeding tube? Is there any one (nurse or Dr Assistant) that can answer your questions?

    I don;t have answers0 but just questions like you---keep posting because there probably will someone that has been thought his same situation as you...
  • MAE66
    MAE66 Member Posts: 66
    I know how you feel
    My husband is also stage 4. He had a brief remission, then it showed up in his bones. He faught really hard, and is still not giving up. He is currently in Hospice care. The only reason he signed the consent forms is that he was assured that if he got better, he could leave Hospice care and go back into treatment. He has chemo induced liver failure and is not able to have any more treatment at this time. If his liver were to improve, than he could get more treatment, this is what he holds on to.

    Talk to his Doctor about Hospice and what is available to you. When my husband finally agreed to Hospice so many more services became available to us, as much as I hate to have him need the care, it has been so much easier than just coping at home. I hope this helps, I know how hard this is.

    Take care,
  • chrisk06
    chrisk06 Member Posts: 110
    Hospice care
    I lost my husband on December 23, 2009 to EC w/ mets to liver and lungs and reoccurance in the esoph. He went suddenly, but his mother had cervical cancer. Once she knew her cancer was back and that I would have to take care of her and Steve, which I was willing to do, she decided she wanted Hopsice care. And I wouldn't have changed a thing. They are wonderful people. At first I was reluctant,but now I am so glad we did! If you have any question I would be happy to answer them if I can.

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  • mumphy
    mumphy Member Posts: 440
    unknown said:

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator

    Dear Crose
    Just be there. I just recently lost my husbad to this horrible disease. He spent the entire time with me at home. The health care workers were wonderful. This is a choice that we made together. He had his children and grandchildren with him during his last day. This is very difficult for me. I kept him with me until the end I do not regret any of it.

    I thank God knowing that he didn't suffer he just slowly driffed off to sleep.