Guess I wanted to give some encouragement

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outdoorgirl
outdoorgirl Member Posts: 1,565
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
hopefully! Wanted to let the newbies and those of you who are not so new know that there is life after cancer! Maybe not the same as before...mind you,but there is life!
2 years ago I never thought that I would be able to move on-thought that there would always be that dark cancer cloud over my head that I was never going to be able to get rid of.And in a way,I didn't really want to get rid of it for some strange reason.It was part of my identity-what I thought others knew me by,and I wanted to keep it!I wanted to hang on to my oncs and nurses with all I had-I couldn't bear to let go of them.
Today,I am still aware that I have to be aware of my body and I know that my future is uncertain-but I am also learning that being in remission(for that is what my oncs and nurses call it)is not such a bad place to be-as others who are not in these shoes of mine and I hope never have to be will remind me of when I start to sink in a funk..Oh yeah,I still freak out when it comes time for my annual pap and mammos and now in about a year or so another colonoscopy as well...I can't help that-I'm only human...but you know what? This year before my mammo,I am going to Aruba with family and am planning on enjoying it to the fullest and not thinking of what awaits me when I get back!
I am definitely not perfect-boy do I have my pity parties-but I think I've discovered that life is still good and I'm going to try to be swallowed up by it and enjoy it for what it is until it's gone!
I hope this does some good and is uplifting if any of you are having a hard time..Just wanted to share my feelings,I guess..

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  • jennytwist
    jennytwist Member Posts: 896
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    Thanks!
    I'm just at my one year dx and have been feeling really scared and down and very anxious. I just had my 1st mammogram as well. Thanks for sharing - you're positive outlook and energy make me feel better too.
    -Jenny
  • dash4
    dash4 Member Posts: 303 Member
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    you have helped me..
    It is so inspiring and hopeful to hear your story. I have been the caregiver for my husband since 2004(diagnosed Stage IV colon cancer) and he lost his battle 9/25/09. I was diagnosed 2/1/10 with breast cancer. I watched my husband with over 250 chemos and many surgeries. I am getting nervous about all my "what ifs" and I don't even know yet if I even need chemo... I keep being told that his journey and mine are so different and I am well aware of that in my head (I am Stage I bc), but my heart has not gotten the message yet. I had a very difficult day yesterday for many reasons, and your post has been very uplifting...thanks for sharing.
  • New Flower
    New Flower Member Posts: 4,294
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    dash4 said:

    you have helped me..
    It is so inspiring and hopeful to hear your story. I have been the caregiver for my husband since 2004(diagnosed Stage IV colon cancer) and he lost his battle 9/25/09. I was diagnosed 2/1/10 with breast cancer. I watched my husband with over 250 chemos and many surgeries. I am getting nervous about all my "what ifs" and I don't even know yet if I even need chemo... I keep being told that his journey and mine are so different and I am well aware of that in my head (I am Stage I bc), but my heart has not gotten the message yet. I had a very difficult day yesterday for many reasons, and your post has been very uplifting...thanks for sharing.

    Thank you
    for sharing your story. We need more uplifting stories and discussions. My friend just came back from Aruba and absolutely loved it. Wishing you best vacation ever!
    New Flower
  • chenheart
    chenheart Member Posts: 5,159
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    What an uplifting breath of
    What an uplifting breath of encouraging fresh air your post is! Thank you so much for proving, as I love to say that there is Life After Cancer ( and during too!) It matters not if our lives are the same as they were before~ they are not the same the moment we bring a baby home from the hospital, not the same when we have "milestone" birthdays, or lose jobs, or divorce, or move across country, or are in a car accident, etc etc etc! Everyday has the potential to upset our life-cart; in good, bad, and uncertain ways. It seems to me that you are taking all of it and saying "Yeah~ I am in remission, look out world!" Of course it goes without saying that I hope there is never ever a recurrance for any of us; myself included. But one thing I know for sure~Staying home hibernating as opposed to going dancing, or to the movies, or joining a book club, or taking up candy making or going to Aruba (!!! WOOT WOOT))) will not keep us safe. Get out there, you sooo deserve it!

    Hugs,
    Chen♥
  • Moopy23
    Moopy23 Member Posts: 1,751 Member
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    Grateful
    Thank you for writing this, Patty. You express so well the feelings we have and how we can move forward, through it all to a good place-a place where we are vigilant about our health but don't let fear rob us of joy in life. I am so glad and grateful for you, my friend. I am looking forward to photos and details on that trip to Aruba!
  • aztec45
    aztec45 Member Posts: 757
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    Aruba
    Aruba. I am jealous. You go enjoy yourself and have lots of fun. Thanks for the post. There is life after BC.

    P
  • canoegirl
    canoegirl Member Posts: 169
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    Thanks for posting this.
    Thanks for posting this. It's encouraging to read on the eve of my first chemo treatment.

    Have fun in Aruba when you go!
  • jk1952
    jk1952 Member Posts: 613
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    canoegirl said:

    Thanks for posting this.
    Thanks for posting this. It's encouraging to read on the eve of my first chemo treatment.

    Have fun in Aruba when you go!

    Patty, I'm happy that you
    Patty, I'm so happy that you have found contentment, no matter what the circumstances and that, on a whole, you've put cancer behind you and are living life to its fullest. Isn't it wonderful to know that although cancer is/has been a part of your life, it doesn't have to rule it? When we're going through the treatments, it's so hard to believe that life will get better, but it really will, and we need to celebrate all the triumphs. Keep living life to its fullest!

    Joyce
  • mimivac
    mimivac Member Posts: 2,143 Member
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    Good for you, Patty!
    Great post. There is, indeed, life after cancer. We may have our ups and downs, but no one should doubt that life's joys will be with them again. You express the state of fear so well --the dark cloud of cancer. I, too, thought it would always be with me. Now, it is only sometimes over my head. The rest of the time I'm out there like you enjoying life. Things are different, but they're good, too. Have a blast in Aruba! I'm so jealous. Our big trip this year will be to Canada! Hmm, maybe I should re-think that. LOL.

    Mimi
  • rainbow4
    rainbow4 Member Posts: 137
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    Moving on -
    at least sort of. Thanks so much, all of you, for the encouraging words. I've been having a really tough time, mentally, for the last couple of months. Like you said, my head knows I can move on and deal with it, but my heart still hasn't gotten the message. But I guess it's beginning. For quite awhile after surgery, I'd catch myself doing a self-exam in the shower - every time I took a shower. Extreme, to say the least. Realized this week that I'm not doing it every time any more. Chen, once again you're so good with the right words at the right time!
    -rainbow4
  • Christmas Girl
    Christmas Girl Member Posts: 3,682 Member
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    Awesome upcoming vacation!
    Good for you, Patty! A wonderful thing to look FORWARD to!

    Kind regards, Susan
  • cats_toy
    cats_toy Member Posts: 1,462 Member
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    the best is yet to come....
    sweet words Patty, and I am so glad you are feeling good about life and everything that goes along with it. Hope you have a wonderful time on your vacation and we will need to see pictures...lots of them!
    When are you going?
    Cat
  • outdoorgirl
    outdoorgirl Member Posts: 1,565
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    cats_toy said:

    the best is yet to come....
    sweet words Patty, and I am so glad you are feeling good about life and everything that goes along with it. Hope you have a wonderful time on your vacation and we will need to see pictures...lots of them!
    When are you going?
    Cat

    Not until
    the first week of August-then my mammo is scheduled for the 17th I think..