notatas Member Posts: 1
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
Just had a mastectomy on both breasts on Thursday. Feeling depressed and lonely.


  • MyTurnNow
    MyTurnNow Member Posts: 2,686 Member
    Welcome, Notatas, to this
    Welcome, Notatas, to this amazing group. I did not have a mastectomy but there are many ladies on this site who have. I'm sure there will be several coming along any moment and can share their experience with you. This is a journey that none of us wanted to take but all I can say is one step at a time. We are here for you to offer support, encouragement, or just listen. Please continue to post and we'll be there to hold your hand. Take care!!
  • Marcia527
    Marcia527 Member Posts: 2,729
    You are not alone. I had a
    You are not alone. I had a radical modified mastectomy on right side. Lots of ladies here have had both. We will try to help you so just hang in there. Hugs.
  • mema1963
    mema1963 Member Posts: 18
    No you are not alone we are
    No you are not alone we are all going thru this together and i guess those going thru it can understand better too. I am still going thru chemo but will have a double masectomy and i am also worried, but i will call on my sisters in pink! God Bless You!
  • Sunrae
    Sunrae Member Posts: 808
    mema1963 said:

    No you are not alone we are
    No you are not alone we are all going thru this together and i guess those going thru it can understand better too. I am still going thru chemo but will have a double masectomy and i am also worried, but i will call on my sisters in pink! God Bless You!

    I'm so sorry that you had to
    I'm so sorry that you had to have this and that you're feeling lonely and depressed. BC is such an ugly thing and it takes up a lot of our life. I think its pretty normal for you to feel so bad, look at what you just came thru. Girl, You're stronger and more courageous than you realize. I've been dxed 5 months and still waiting for my masectomy. You're ahead of me and closer to getting to the finish line and beating this cancer beast. Hopefully, in a few days you'll start feeling better and healing will bring strenth back to your body. We're here for you and you can reach us anytime of the day and night. I'm sorry you had to be a part of this group but happy you found us. We all help each other. Sending you lots of warm hugs. Please let us know how you're doing. There is life after cancer and this is just the beginning of the next phase of your life. Take care.
  • june4
    june4 Member Posts: 7
    Welcome Notatas
    So glad you found this site. These ladies are a fantastic group of survivors! I'm having the same surgery tomorrow. I'm trying to stay focused on the fact that the tumor will be gone and I'll be one more step closer to being healthy again. You're already on your way to recovery! When you feel down, come on here and read some of the posts. It feels like a disease you are going through alone, but there are too many of us sharing the same or similar experiences.

    Sending you hugs and prayers.
  • Marlene_K
    Marlene_K Member Posts: 508
    I can relate
    I am so sorry you're feeling depressed and lonely notatas! For sure I can relate! I have 3 kids, BUT my daughter is 20 and is away at college. I have two boys, 18 and 11. They are around most of the time during the week, I also work a full time job, and they go to their dads on the weekend. That gives me a lot of down time on the weekends and it makes me think a lot. Because of not feeling well due to finishing up chemo, I've been sad & depressed myself from time to time. For the most part, I try to keep a very positive attitude, but sometimes no matter what I do, I get down. All the wonderful survivors on this board really help! There are so many women on here that have been through this. Sometimes someone just simply 'understanding' can make a huge difference.

    I had a radical mastectomy of my left breast. Yea, I have one left, but sometimes feel like I made a mistake. My surgeon didn't want me to have a bilateral saying that I had onl a 2% chance of getting it in the other. I didn't have immediate reconstruction and looking at only one breast in my reflection is not a very pleasant sight. Did you or will you be having reconstruction? I try to keep my mind focused on the future. I will one day have hair again, I will one day lose the weight that I put on since diagnosis, I will one day have a breast to match the other (or if I'm lucky, a pair of bigger ones, as I've always been small... 36A). You will see from reading posts here that yes, there is life after cancer! We go through so much and sometimes it's hard to see the light. Sometimes a great big cry helps... lets it loose and then we can regain our strength.

    You came to the right place and as long as you come around here, the times you feel depressed and/or lonely will be a whole lot less!

    Hugs, Mar
  • jbug
    jbug Member Posts: 285
    Welcome...I didn't have to
    Welcome...I didn't have to walk where you are now, but know the fears of fighting bc. This is a great place to come for love and support! You are not alone! Take one day at a time and know that you're allowed to be sad.

  • jthor54
    jthor54 Member Posts: 4
    in same boat with you
    I am in the same boat as you are. Had double mastectomy 4 weeks ago and am now going to the oncologist tomorrow. Am healing great, have all the taps off where the incision is. haven't really decided if i want to have reconstructive surgery, but it is on the table for later. The nineteen lymph nodes taken and tested did not have cancer, I am happy about that. keeping a positive attitude is the best medicine, and I have a very supportive husband and my kids are great support also. Keep your chin up, this site is wonderful for support also. thank the Lord you are alive.
  • Kylez
    Kylez Member Posts: 3,761 Member
    mema1963 said:

    No you are not alone we are
    No you are not alone we are all going thru this together and i guess those going thru it can understand better too. I am still going thru chemo but will have a double masectomy and i am also worried, but i will call on my sisters in pink! God Bless You!

    I am so sorry that you are
    I am so sorry that you are feeling so down! Know that we are here for you to vent your feelings anytime and to offer support to you. Take care!

    KYLEZ ♥
  • ms_independent
    ms_independent Member Posts: 214
    welcome notatas,

    You will have days where you feel tired, lonely and depressed. Unfortunately, it goes with this nasty disease. I have found that I feel much less lonely because of this site. I don't think anyone can really understand what we are feeling unless they have fought this disease. That's not to take a shot at other people. They can be great at every other aspect of being a friend or caregiver. I just don't believe you can really "get it" if you haven't been here. I now feel bad that I wasn't more supportive of friends/family who have battled bc---I just didn't "get it". And, I'll do better next time.
    I also had a bilateral mastectomy with placement of tissue expanders and lymph node sampling in December. I am just one of many here who will be happy to answer questions and support you as you move forward. You are not alone in this battle---lots of sisters here to help!!

    HUGS, El
  • kasd
    kasd Member Posts: 2
    Try to keep positive. I started this fight almost 9 months ago and staying positive and faithful have been so helpful. Family and friends (too many of which have also been affected by this disease) have been great. Do you have a support system? If so, draw on them. If not, your doctor, hospital or treatment center should have counselors to help you, too. I've been reading through the discussion boards here and have found some helpful postings from other survivors.

    I will add you to my prayer list.

    PPT (prayers and positive thoughts)...

  • Christine Louise
    Christine Louise Member Posts: 426 Member
    Things that help my depression
    Things that make me feel less depressed since my bi-lateral mastectomy:

    Talking or being with friends, of course. Don't be ashamed to share your depression or tears. You don't have to be thought of as superwoman.

    Walkin' around the house a bit, even if unsteadily, slowly, only once even. Just getting up for a little while.

    Movies, if they're upbeat. Funny TV shows. Sounds dumb or obvious, but sometimes I just stared at the walls, feeling blue -- not good. Diversion is good.

    Crying. Clears things out for a while. I'll sob like I'm never going to stop, then suddenly I'll stop and be ok for quite a while.

    Chatting on this site.

    Showering. The first time's a shock, to be sure. But getting into that clean nightie -- mmmm.

    Valium. Sleep.

    OK, these are kinda dumb suggestions, but sometimes even simple things aren't obvious when you're feeling down. I hope you get relief from your depression. I'd give you my fuzzy blanket if I could cram it through cyberspace.