JUST A RELIGIOUS JOKE MY DAD SENT ME TODAY IT MADE ME SMILE SO I DECIDED TO SHARE
Comments
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:-)PhillieG said:Steve Martin: Atheists Don't Have No Songs
Pretty clever Steve Martin Video about religious hymns.
I hope you all can enjoy it for what it's worth...
Oh that Steve Martin is an interesting man. I've always seen him as someone who has a mind akin to Robin Williams, they are both of quick mind and wit. Thank you for sharing Phil!
RE0 -
Steve MartinRE said::-)
Oh that Steve Martin is an interesting man. I've always seen him as someone who has a mind akin to Robin Williams, they are both of quick mind and wit. Thank you for sharing Phil!
RE
I can see a similarity with Robin Williams but I think Williams is more rapid fire and a bit off the wall. I know that Johnathan Winters was a big influence on Robin Williams.
I read Steve Martin's bio "Born Standing Up" that was pretty interesting. He's (another) one of those shy people who has a very comic side but he's not always "on". I also have found him to be more of a thinking person's comic compared to someone like Larry the Cable Guy. Martin has also played a father in a lot of movies (Father of the Bride, Parenthood, Cheaper by the Dozen) yet he has no children. I find that interesting. One of his first comic gigs was as a writer for The Smothers Brother's Show in the 60's. He's also a hell of a great banjo player.
If you want to see something very funny, Google "The Great Flydini" and check out the video. VERY funny skit he did on Carson years ago...
Glad you enjoyed it RE. I hope you had a Merry Christmas and that you have a very Happy and Healthy New Year
-phil0 -
Would atheists be upset over this? I wasn't clear where they were singing this. So even tho I thought it was amusing, not sure everyone would.PhillieG said:Steve Martin
I can see a similarity with Robin Williams but I think Williams is more rapid fire and a bit off the wall. I know that Johnathan Winters was a big influence on Robin Williams.
I read Steve Martin's bio "Born Standing Up" that was pretty interesting. He's (another) one of those shy people who has a very comic side but he's not always "on". I also have found him to be more of a thinking person's comic compared to someone like Larry the Cable Guy. Martin has also played a father in a lot of movies (Father of the Bride, Parenthood, Cheaper by the Dozen) yet he has no children. I find that interesting. One of his first comic gigs was as a writer for The Smothers Brother's Show in the 60's. He's also a hell of a great banjo player.
If you want to see something very funny, Google "The Great Flydini" and check out the video. VERY funny skit he did on Carson years ago...
Glad you enjoyed it RE. I hope you had a Merry Christmas and that you have a very Happy and Healthy New Year
-phil
I think Steve Martin got parent parts because he looks the part. Actors after all aren't the people they play. Personal lives are pretty complicated.0 -
"atheists watch football in their underpants"PhillieG said:Steve Martin: Atheists Don't Have No Songs
Pretty clever Steve Martin Video about religious hymns.
I hope you all can enjoy it for what it's worth...
Amusing, phil. Amazing about the internet, how through our connectivity with one another we are able to be provided these little gems. Thanks for this one.
Take care,
Joe0 -
BTWMarcia527 said:Would atheists be upset over this? I wasn't clear where they were singing this. So even tho I thought it was amusing, not sure everyone would.
I think Steve Martin got parent parts because he looks the part. Actors after all aren't the people they play. Personal lives are pretty complicated.
Love your artwork, marcia! The innocence, the rawness, actually strengthens it, not to try to analyze what is clearly a lot of fun for you...and me.
Take care,
Joe0 -
Love the dénouement!
(Edit, should have read the whole thread first - I meant your opening joke, but they're all funny, everybody's is!=))0 -
Thanks Joesoccerfreaks said:BTW
Love your artwork, marcia! The innocence, the rawness, actually strengthens it, not to try to analyze what is clearly a lot of fun for you...and me.
Take care,
Joe
The only part I drew tho was the stick me. The colorful parts were added from the Pacasa site.
I like fun. My kids are grown so it's time for my second childhood.0 -
PhilliegPhillieG said:Steve Martin: Atheists Don't Have No Songs
Pretty clever Steve Martin Video about religious hymns.
I hope you all can enjoy it for what it's worth...
The video is great, posted it on FaceBook :-)0 -
Hindi jokes
Unique and Creative collection of Hindi jokes which gives strength to your words.Shayri is a unique poetis language to express yourself,Shayri ko hi dil ki kalam aur mohabbat ki ink kehte hain.0 -
AN ATHEIST IN THE WOODS
An atheist was walking through the woods.
'What majestic trees!'
'What powerful rivers!'
'What beautiful animals!'
He said to himself.
As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.
He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him.
He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder & saw that the bear was closing in on him.
He looked over his shoulder again, & the bear was even closer.
He tripped & fell on the ground.
He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw & raising his right paw to strike him.
At that instant moment, the Atheist cried out:
'Oh my God!'
Time stopped.
The bear froze.
The forest was silent.
As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky.
'You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident.'
'Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament?'
'Am I to count you as a believer?'
The atheist looked directly into the light, and said: 'It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?'
'Very well', said the voice.
The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed. And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head & spoke:
'Lord bless this food, which I am about to receive from Thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen.'0 -
:-Dsoccerfreaks said:AN ATHEIST IN THE WOODS
An atheist was walking through the woods.
'What majestic trees!'
'What powerful rivers!'
'What beautiful animals!'
He said to himself.
As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.
He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him.
He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder & saw that the bear was closing in on him.
He looked over his shoulder again, & the bear was even closer.
He tripped & fell on the ground.
He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw & raising his right paw to strike him.
At that instant moment, the Atheist cried out:
'Oh my God!'
Time stopped.
The bear froze.
The forest was silent.
As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky.
'You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident.'
'Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament?'
'Am I to count you as a believer?'
The atheist looked directly into the light, and said: 'It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?'
'Very well', said the voice.
The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed. And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head & spoke:
'Lord bless this food, which I am about to receive from Thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen.'
HAHAHA that's a good one Joe, my dad would get a kick out of that one for sure! Thanks for the laugh!
RE0 -
Here is another funny from My Daddy.
PECANS IN THE CEMETERY
On the outskirts of a small town, there was a big, old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence. One day, two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts.
'One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me' said one boy.. Several dropped and rolled down toward the fence.
Another boy came riding along the road on his bicycle. As he passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery. He slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he heard, 'One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me..'
He just knew what it was.. He jumped back on his bike and rode off. Just around the bend he met an old man with a cane, hobbling along.
'Come here quick,' said the Boy, 'you won't believe what I heard! Satan and the Lord are down at the cemetery dividing up the souls.'
The man said, 'Beat it kid, can't you see it's hard for me to walk.' When the boy insisted though, the man hobbled slowly to the cemetery.
Standing by the fence they heard , 'One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me.'
The old man whispered, 'Boy, you've been tellin' me the truth. Let's see if we can see the Lord..'
Shaking with fear, they peered through the fence, yet were still unable to see anything.. The old man and the boy gripped the wrought iron bars of the fence tighter and tighter as they tried to get a glimpse of the Lord.
At last they heard, 'One for you, one for me.. That's all.... Now let's go get those nuts by the fence and we'll be done..'
They say the old man made it back to town a full 5 minutes ahead of the kid on the bike.
SMILE, God Loves you!0 -
Thank you!!!RE said:Here is another funny from My Daddy.
PECANS IN THE CEMETERY
On the outskirts of a small town, there was a big, old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence. One day, two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts.
'One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me' said one boy.. Several dropped and rolled down toward the fence.
Another boy came riding along the road on his bicycle. As he passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery. He slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he heard, 'One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me..'
He just knew what it was.. He jumped back on his bike and rode off. Just around the bend he met an old man with a cane, hobbling along.
'Come here quick,' said the Boy, 'you won't believe what I heard! Satan and the Lord are down at the cemetery dividing up the souls.'
The man said, 'Beat it kid, can't you see it's hard for me to walk.' When the boy insisted though, the man hobbled slowly to the cemetery.
Standing by the fence they heard , 'One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me.'
The old man whispered, 'Boy, you've been tellin' me the truth. Let's see if we can see the Lord..'
Shaking with fear, they peered through the fence, yet were still unable to see anything.. The old man and the boy gripped the wrought iron bars of the fence tighter and tighter as they tried to get a glimpse of the Lord.
At last they heard, 'One for you, one for me.. That's all.... Now let's go get those nuts by the fence and we'll be done..'
They say the old man made it back to town a full 5 minutes ahead of the kid on the bike.
SMILE, God Loves you!
Thank you for the laugh out loud joke, absolutely loved it!!!0 -
I'm a fair share...PhillieG said:Another Joke
Irish Confessional:
An Irishman goes into the confessional box after years of being away from the Church. There's a fully equipped bar with Guinness on tap. On the other wall is a dazzling array of the finest cigars and chocolates. Then the priest comes in. "Father, forgive me, for it's been a very long time since I've been to confession, but I must first admit that the confessional box is much more inviting than it used to be."
The priest replies: "Get out. You're on my side."
Hello !
I'm a fair share Irish and was raised romen catholic....and this absolutely tickled my funny bone to the hilt ! Thank you !0 -
Heeee-heee !RE said:OKAY HERE IS ANOTHER SILLY JOKE
DISCLAIMER: This one is so bad you are gonna groan but it made me smile so here goes....
Who Should Make the Coffee?
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."
The husband said, "You are in charge of the cooking around here so you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides it says in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."
Husband replies, "I can't believe that! Show me."
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says, "HEBREWS."
Hello !
Know this is an old post...but had to say it was excellant ! Need laughter !0 -
LOL...PhillieG said:A Joke
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: 'Take only ONE. God is watching.' Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, 'Take all you want. God is watching the apples.'
Love it !0 -
Just cruzingsoccerfreaks said:AN ATHEIST IN THE WOODS
An atheist was walking through the woods.
'What majestic trees!'
'What powerful rivers!'
'What beautiful animals!'
He said to himself.
As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.
He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him.
He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder & saw that the bear was closing in on him.
He looked over his shoulder again, & the bear was even closer.
He tripped & fell on the ground.
He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw & raising his right paw to strike him.
At that instant moment, the Atheist cried out:
'Oh my God!'
Time stopped.
The bear froze.
The forest was silent.
As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky.
'You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident.'
'Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament?'
'Am I to count you as a believer?'
The atheist looked directly into the light, and said: 'It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?'
'Very well', said the voice.
The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed. And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head & spoke:
'Lord bless this food, which I am about to receive from Thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen.'
Again, I know an old post...but had alot of fun with this one ! Made me laugh that I cried.0 -
This is awesome! I hope you
This is awesome! I hope you don't mind if I share it.0
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