update on my mama and lots of questions

worriedaboutmom

Hi ladies! I have not been on here for a very long time, but I am just wondering if anyone has had a situation like this. Let me refresh my moms story as its been a while. My mom was diagnosed this past march with stage 4 ovca that had metastasized into her liver and throughout her abdomen. She was extremely ill and they started her on carbo/taxol. Immediately after her first treatment, she started to feel better. After 6 rounds of chemo, her pet scan showed her liver to be clear and all other masses shrunk significantly. She then underwent complete hysterectomy/debulking surgery. They were able to remove almost everything except a few spots on her intestines and some seedlike scatterings. Her surgery was in October. She then started Cistplatin/Gemzar on Dec 1st. A few weeks ago, she started having problems with her stomach. The PA said it could just be the chemo. This past Tuesday, I took her to get her treatment, and the dr. said her stomach felt funny. He said no treatment and sent her directly over for a cat scan. After the cat scan, she started throwing up, and threw up for most of the night until we brought her to the ER around 2 a.m. Cat scan shows that cancer has progressed, new cancer in her liver and colon area. The reason that she was sick is the cancer was blocking her colon. They had to do emergency surgery to unblock her colon and place a colostomy bag. Apparently the Cist/Gemzar was not working. So now she has to wait 3 MORE WEEKS to go back to taxol to see if they can shrink the tumors. HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN SO FAST??? She was doing so well, now what is going to happen?? Do we have hope still? I cannot bear the thought of my life without my mom. I have to take xanax because I hyperventilate and have panic attacks when I think about losing her. I am 34, and I am extremely close to my mom and I still need her here! I really am not ready for this, especially since she was doing SO WELL!!!! HELP PLEASE!! What if the taxol doesn't work anymore? I am in absolute shock and need to hear anything that you can tell me!!
Thank you so much

AnitaW54

More Chemo Options
There should be more chemo options other than carbo/taxol. I started with StageIIIc ovarian cancer in Oct 2002. My first line of treatment was carbo/taxol for 6 months of standard dosage and then continued with 12 months of "maintenance" treatments. I've also had carbo/taxotere, Doxil (did not work well), cisplatin (did ok), oscillaplatin/5-FU (worked great until I could no longer tolerate the oscillaplatin 7 months later), now, since Aug. '09 I am on Xeloda which is oral 5-FU and it is working okay. Currently I am what I call "hovering". CA-125 is between 45 and 50 for the last two months. It is better than 647+ which is where I began in Jan. 2009. So, my point is that there are many more chemo options and I hope that your doctor will be able to find one that works for your mom. In the meantime, please take a deep breath and exhale slowly several times. Do this several times a day or any time you feel that pressure on your chest. I will pray for you and your mom that God will guide you through these difficult, unsure times. I've recently discovered that music is a great healer. I have found some great stuff on YouTube - the artist Enya is wonderful and any music labeled for Reiki. I was loaned an interesting book called The Healing Power of Sound by Mitchell L. Gaynor, M.D., an oncologist who incorporates sound with traditional cancer therapy. Much love to you both! XO

Barbara53

What if?
Yes, you are in shock. It seems to dig twice as deep when you think everything is improving. My mom has been fighting for a year, and she, too, is have serious problems.

Please, please talk to yourself (or someone you trust) to get down from the Me tree. Whatever comes, you will get through it, and each day will make you wiser.

Once you come down from the Me tree, you will see that this is all about new and different (sometimes better) ways to love your Mom. She needs you so much -- she could never say it -- but now's your chance to shower her with the unconditional love she has always given you. Don't give her the idea she has to perform by meeting medical goals. This is beyond her control. Just be there.

saundra

Barbara53 said:

What if?
Yes, you are in shock. It seems to dig twice as deep when you think everything is improving. My mom has been fighting for a year, and she, too, is have serious problems.

Please, please talk to yourself (or someone you trust) to get down from the Me tree. Whatever comes, you will get through it, and each day will make you wiser.

Once you come down from the Me tree, you will see that this is all about new and different (sometimes better) ways to love your Mom. She needs you so much -- she could never say it -- but now's your chance to shower her with the unconditional love she has always given you. Don't give her the idea she has to perform by meeting medical goals. This is beyond her control. Just be there.

Ditto for me
Barbara has the right idea. The table has turned on you and you have to step up to the plate now and be there for your mother. Believe me, she needs you. God will give you the strength. Saundra

worriedaboutmom

saundra said:

Ditto for me
Barbara has the right idea. The table has turned on you and you have to step up to the plate now and be there for your mother. Believe me, she needs you. God will give you the strength. Saundra

Thanks
Thanks ladies for your words of encouragement. My mom is still in the hospital, I learned today how to change her colostomy bag. She seems to be doing better today, just a little depressed. As soon as she gets out of here, the dr. is going to put her back on taxol/carbo. Hopefully it will work as well as it did the first time. I had a talk with her, and let her know that she is not alone, I am here with her and we are gonna fight this together. Thanks again for you encouragement, and for sharing your stories and suggestions. It's nice to know there people like you caring ladies that know what we are going through.
Thanks again!
Becky

worriedaboutmom

saundra said:

Ditto for me
Barbara has the right idea. The table has turned on you and you have to step up to the plate now and be there for your mother. Believe me, she needs you. God will give you the strength. Saundra

thanks
sorry i posted twice--oops!

msfanciful

worriedaboutmom said:

thanks
sorry i posted twice--oops!

How is Your Mom?
Hi,

You and your mother have been on my mind.

I meant to check in sooner. How is she and you holding up?

I know everything is overwhelming right now, but a lot of us are ready
and waiting to be here for you and your mom with any answers and prayers
you may need, okay?

Don't feel like you are imposing is you have questions. Having my questions answered
by these ladies, gave me so much peace of mind when I could'nt find it anywhere else
(outside prayer of course).

Love,

Sharon

Northwoodsgirl

You Mom
I lost my Mom to cancer in 2005. I can only imagine what you are going through.
I now have the same cancer and stage that took my Mom's life.
Please stay in the present moment. Don't think too far ahead and play the game of "could have, would have, should have'''"
You are close to your Mom and she needs your love and support one minute at a time.
My heart goes out to you. May you find the grace and peace to be there for your Mom no matter where the journey takes you.

worriedaboutmom

Northwoodsgirl said:

You Mom
I lost my Mom to cancer in 2005. I can only imagine what you are going through.
I now have the same cancer and stage that took my Mom's life.
Please stay in the present moment. Don't think too far ahead and play the game of "could have, would have, should have'''"
You are close to your Mom and she needs your love and support one minute at a time.
My heart goes out to you. May you find the grace and peace to be there for your Mom no matter where the journey takes you.

Thanks For Your Thoughts!
Hi! Thank you guys so much for your thoughts, prayers and advice. This is a really scary time, but we are going to get through it because we know God has a reason for everything (I just would like to know what the reason is!). We went to the oncologist today, the dr. said that she has two new lesions in her liver (one is over an inch in size!), and new nodules in her abdomen and intestinal area. All of this suprised the dr. because she was doing so well and she had no active tumors in her liver just in october!! He is going to start her back on just taxol next friday because he said her cancer is resistant to the platin drugs. I guess the plan for now is weekly taxol until it stops working, and then he rattled off a list of other things he could try such as doxil, etc. He said it is not time to give up, he still has some tricks in his bag. He said her cancer just got pissed, so we have to get pissed too!
My mom is pretty weak still from all of the bowel obstruction/colostomy stuff this past couple weeks and she has lost 12 pounds just in the last 2 weeks. She is EXTREMELY depressed and I am trying my best to cheer her up. Thank you so much for all of your prayers, she will continue to need them to get her strength and spirits up. I am keeping all of you in my thoughts and prayers as well and I really appreciate all the support that you give. It is so good to have people that understand exactly what me and my poor mama are going through. Thank you again!
God Bless,
Becky

msfanciful

worriedaboutmom said:

Thanks For Your Thoughts!
Hi! Thank you guys so much for your thoughts, prayers and advice. This is a really scary time, but we are going to get through it because we know God has a reason for everything (I just would like to know what the reason is!). We went to the oncologist today, the dr. said that she has two new lesions in her liver (one is over an inch in size!), and new nodules in her abdomen and intestinal area. All of this suprised the dr. because she was doing so well and she had no active tumors in her liver just in october!! He is going to start her back on just taxol next friday because he said her cancer is resistant to the platin drugs. I guess the plan for now is weekly taxol until it stops working, and then he rattled off a list of other things he could try such as doxil, etc. He said it is not time to give up, he still has some tricks in his bag. He said her cancer just got pissed, so we have to get pissed too!
My mom is pretty weak still from all of the bowel obstruction/colostomy stuff this past couple weeks and she has lost 12 pounds just in the last 2 weeks. She is EXTREMELY depressed and I am trying my best to cheer her up. Thank you so much for all of your prayers, she will continue to need them to get her strength and spirits up. I am keeping all of you in my thoughts and prayers as well and I really appreciate all the support that you give. It is so good to have people that understand exactly what me and my poor mama are going through. Thank you again!
God Bless,
Becky

Where Are You Becky?
Hi,

You have crossed my mind ... how are things at this point? If you feel like expressing anything please know we are here for you.

I know you are going through sooo much at this time, so I only ask out concern for you, your mother and family.

Please let us know how you are faring?

Of course you know you can always contact us if you have any further questions.

In the spirit with you,

Sharon