My fiancee was confirmed to have BC

kc00
kc00 Member Posts: 4
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
Hello lovely pple,

This site as being of great information to me about cancer. Its started in November,09 when my girlfriend age 25 started coughing blood then came lump(not sure if its the right word or spelling)on her breast.She decided to see a doc. did some scan all negative and the doc suggest to wait until Jan,2010 to see if the lump grows further.Cutting the story short,she did surgrey on both breast taking out the lump detected from the mammogramm and utralsound scan.Then came the histology report its cancer but the doc.couldnt say what stage cause she couldnt perform more scan.We talking about africa,Nigeria to be precise. Now she started 3 weeks chemo.So many pain for her and am helpless in-fact l hate myself that l do not know what to do or how to help her. I reside in Germany and was thinking of bringing her here for treatment but the doc.suggested US or UK cos they are more advance in treatment unlike Germany. The issue of financing the treatment is als high since she is not insured in those countries. Am confused,am broken and helpless knowing my fiancee is going through such pain.Any advice for me please on what to do ? Thanks at all

Comments

  • Aortus
    Aortus Member Posts: 967
    Hello KC
    First, I am very sorry to hear of your girlfriend's diagnosis. I'm also sorry that there is no real cancer center in Nigeria to treat her. Neither of these facts are her fault or your fault. Please do not hate yourself! You are doing everything you can by consulting the doctor in Germany.

    I am not an expert, but I would offer a couple of options.

    One option would be getting your fiancee to Germany as soon as possible. No doubt it will be hard for her to travel, and hard to be away from Nigeria. But she will have you by her side and she will have better treatment in Germany than she would in Nigeria. In the meantime you might investigate which German hospitals would be the best.

    Another option would be traveling to the Johns Hopkins Breast Cancer Center in Baltimore, Maryland, USA. It is a world famous cancer center, and I believe (although I could be wrong) that they will see anyone who comes to their hospital. Their website is here:

    http://www.hopkinsbreastcenter.org/contact_us/

    In any event, I hope and pray that both your fiancee and you will get through this together and be well. Please come back with any more questions.

    God Bless,
    Joe
  • LadyParvati
    LadyParvati Member Posts: 328
    Here's a link to the Society
    Here's a link to the Society of Oncology and Cancer Research of Nigeria--I'm sure they will have information regarding treatment locations in Nigeria for your fiancee:

    http://www.socron.net/socron_new/
  • mariam_11_09
    mariam_11_09 Member Posts: 691
    get treatment outside of Africa if you can
    Personally I would get your fiancee to Germany. I live between the US and Niger (also lived in Burkina Faso and know many of the neighbouring countries). Personally I would not want to have my cancer treated over there, no offense but there is world of a difference between health care in Africa and the US and Europe. I have experienced both and watched loved ones in both.

    It is correct that some of the best cancer treatment occurs in the US but you might not have that option and I am sure Germany comes in close behind and way above Nigeria. Are you a German citizen? If so marry her right away or see if there is a way you can get her insured in Germany and over there.

    If you can search for some organizations that might help woman from Africa get treatment or help fund their treatment in Europe or the US.

    I wish you and your fiancee well.
  • mariam_11_09
    mariam_11_09 Member Posts: 691

    get treatment outside of Africa if you can
    Personally I would get your fiancee to Germany. I live between the US and Niger (also lived in Burkina Faso and know many of the neighbouring countries). Personally I would not want to have my cancer treated over there, no offense but there is world of a difference between health care in Africa and the US and Europe. I have experienced both and watched loved ones in both.

    It is correct that some of the best cancer treatment occurs in the US but you might not have that option and I am sure Germany comes in close behind and way above Nigeria. Are you a German citizen? If so marry her right away or see if there is a way you can get her insured in Germany and over there.

    If you can search for some organizations that might help woman from Africa get treatment or help fund their treatment in Europe or the US.

    I wish you and your fiancee well.

    alternatively
    try the Cancer Society of South Africa. They do have great medical facilities. I also lived there and still have family over there.
  • pinkkari09
    pinkkari09 Member Posts: 877
    Not sure about cancer
    Not sure about cancer centers outside the US...just wanted to say welcome and keep asking questions, you'll get some answers here. Big Hugs, prayers, peace, and God Bless
    Kari
  • LadyParvati
    LadyParvati Member Posts: 328

    get treatment outside of Africa if you can
    Personally I would get your fiancee to Germany. I live between the US and Niger (also lived in Burkina Faso and know many of the neighbouring countries). Personally I would not want to have my cancer treated over there, no offense but there is world of a difference between health care in Africa and the US and Europe. I have experienced both and watched loved ones in both.

    It is correct that some of the best cancer treatment occurs in the US but you might not have that option and I am sure Germany comes in close behind and way above Nigeria. Are you a German citizen? If so marry her right away or see if there is a way you can get her insured in Germany and over there.

    If you can search for some organizations that might help woman from Africa get treatment or help fund their treatment in Europe or the US.

    I wish you and your fiancee well.

    Probably the best plan
    This is probably the best plan. I have heard that German health care is actually quite good, and I know that a couple of the doctors with whom I've spoken consider Europe ahead of the U.S. in cancer research and treatment. Germany could actually be ahead of the U.S. in this medical field rather than behind.
  • fauxma
    fauxma Member Posts: 3,577 Member
    KC,
    I am so sorry that this

    KC,

    I am so sorry that this is happening to your girlfriend. The others have given you good advice on seeking treatment for her. My prayers are that she will find a way to join you in Germany and you can be there to help her through this.
    I was wondering why did they do surgery on both breasts to take out the lump and why no path report? That would have been done on the lump, not by a scan. Did they address the coughing up of blood? You seriously need to get her to you. Germany will have treatment facilities and you can, as someone suggested, marry her. If you are a citizen then she should be eligible for assistance if you don't have finances.
    Again, my prayers are with you both.
    Stef
  • kc00
    kc00 Member Posts: 4
    fauxma said:

    KC,
    I am so sorry that this

    KC,

    I am so sorry that this is happening to your girlfriend. The others have given you good advice on seeking treatment for her. My prayers are that she will find a way to join you in Germany and you can be there to help her through this.
    I was wondering why did they do surgery on both breasts to take out the lump and why no path report? That would have been done on the lump, not by a scan. Did they address the coughing up of blood? You seriously need to get her to you. Germany will have treatment facilities and you can, as someone suggested, marry her. If you are a citizen then she should be eligible for assistance if you don't have finances.
    Again, my prayers are with you both.
    Stef

    Big thanks to you all for
    Big thanks to you all for your concern and good wishes to us. Have actually gone through your replies and would say marrying her isnt the problem( yes am a citizen) but its could take her not less than 6month or more to get a visa for Germany.Surgrey was done on both breast after the mammogram scan show lump in both( 4 on one side, 2 on the other) Am not there so cant really tell what is going on and she cry always whenever we phone making it even more hard.Getting treatment outside Africa or say Nigeria would be nice but l do not have the finance for the treatment.2 surgrey already and she is currently under going chemotherapy.But am not sure if she is in good hands and l cant return to Nigeria now due to work,l just returned this January making it worst.Coughing of blood as reduced but if addressed l cant really say.
    On the website posted, thanks alot for that but they play with people life there.All unversity teaching hosiptal in Nigeria are public hosiptal so they dont take things serious( u may not understand)We started from there in November 09, with no result then l have to send her to private hosiptal this January.So that is how we got to this stage in 2 weeks while 2 months at the other public hosiptal brought zero result.Presently, am looking for ways here in Germany,may God help us.My questions are please can we live a normal life after her treatment?Get married have a family?She was pregn.before she was confirmed having cancer and the doc.said both dont go 2gether so the baby had to be removed during her chemo.treatment.So many pain now presure from family members back home in Nigeria ( leave her leave her,she will not live long due to the illness )its a different world back there when it comes to illness and how the people she it. Everywhere presure and its making me crazy.

    Thanks once again, you all have being of great help. Shall get back to you all if there is anything new until then my regards and prayer to you all