More Ha Ha's - If Men Ruled The World

susie09
susie09 Member Posts: 2,930
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
If Men Ruled the World...

Any fake phone number a girl gave you would automatically forward your call to her real number.

Nodding and looking at your watch would be deemed an acceptable response to "I love you."

Hallmark would make "Sorry, what was your name again?" cards.

When your girlfriend really needed to talk to you during the game, she'd appear in a little box in the corner of the screen during a time-out.

Breaking up would be a lot easier. A smack to the **** and a "Nice hustle, you'll get 'em next time" would pretty much do it.

Birth control would come in ale or lager.

You'd be expected to fill your resume with gag names of people you'd worked for, like "Heywood J'Blowme."

Each year, your raise would be pegged to the fortunes of the NFL team of your choice.

The funniest guy in the office would get to be CEO.

"Sorry I'm late, but I got really wasted last night" would be an acceptable excuse for tardiness.

Tanks would be far easier to rent.

Garbage would take itself out.

Instead of beer belly, you'd get "beer biceps."

Instead of an expensive engagement ring, you could present your wife-to-be with a giant foam hand that said, "You're #1!"

Valentine's Day would be moved to February 29th so it would only occur in leap years.

"Cops" would be broadcast live, and you could phone in advice to the pursuing cops.(Or to the crooks.)

The only show opposite "Monday Night Football" would be "Monday Night Football From A Different Camera Angle."

Telephones would automatically cut off after 30 seconds of conversation.


♠♣ Susie ♠♣

Comments

  • Megan M
    Megan M Member Posts: 3,000
    :-)
    I needed a laugh, so thanks Susie! I especially love the one where if we need to talk to our husbands that we appear in a little box in the corner of the screen during the timeout. That one is so true!

    Megan
  • Ritzy
    Ritzy Member Posts: 4,381 Member
    Megan M said:

    :-)
    I needed a laugh, so thanks Susie! I especially love the one where if we need to talk to our husbands that we appear in a little box in the corner of the screen during the timeout. That one is so true!

    Megan

    LMAO
    I love these!

    Sue :)
  • MyTurnNow
    MyTurnNow Member Posts: 2,686 Member
    Still giggling. Many of
    Still giggling. Many of these are so true. Thanks!!
  • Kristin N
    Kristin N Member Posts: 1,968 Member
    MyTurnNow said:

    Still giggling. Many of
    Still giggling. Many of these are so true. Thanks!!

    Actually Laughing Out Loud ☻
    Kristin ♥
  • jnl
    jnl Member Posts: 3,869 Member
    Kristin N said:

    Actually Laughing Out Loud ☻
    Kristin ♥

    HA!
    I have got to email these to all of my girlfriends! Thanks Susie!

    Leeza
  • susie09
    susie09 Member Posts: 2,930
    jnl said:

    HA!
    I have got to email these to all of my girlfriends! Thanks Susie!

    Leeza

    Glad you liked them! LOL
    Glad you liked them! LOL

    ♠♣ Susie ♠♣
  • survivorbc09
    survivorbc09 Member Posts: 4,374 Member
    susie09 said:

    Glad you liked them! LOL
    Glad you liked them! LOL

    ♠♣ Susie ♠♣

    These are so funny Susie!
    These are so funny Susie! Thank you for posting them!
  • Jeanne D
    Jeanne D Member Posts: 1,867

    These are so funny Susie!
    These are so funny Susie! Thank you for posting them!

    ROFLMAO!
    I can always use a good chuckle! Thanks for this one Susie!


    Love, Jeanne ♥
  • tasha_111
    tasha_111 Member Posts: 2,072
    Jeanne D said:

    ROFLMAO!
    I can always use a good chuckle! Thanks for this one Susie!


    Love, Jeanne ♥

    LOL
    Very Funny..........and TRUE! LMAO Here Jxx
  • DianeBC
    DianeBC Member Posts: 3,881 Member
    tasha_111 said:

    LOL
    Very Funny..........and TRUE! LMAO Here Jxx

    funny!
    I am loling too!
  • Alexis F
    Alexis F Member Posts: 3,598
    MyTurnNow said:

    Still giggling. Many of
    Still giggling. Many of these are so true. Thanks!!

    Susie
    These are Hilarious!



    Lex♥