so many decisions to make

tallchick1266

I am a 42 yr old woman and was recently diagnosed with stage 3 bladder cancer. It is all happening so fast. I would like to hear from some people that have had MVAC Chemo followed by cystectomy. My dad and an uncle also had stage 3 bladder cancer and had the cystectomy immediately following diagnosis and neither one of them has had problems with the external collection bag but I know that is not what I want.
I initially didn't want to consider surgery, I figured chemo and radiation but my oncologist seemed to think that chemo then surgery was the best way to go. I really didn't want to hear that but after all the reading I have done so far, it seems that it offers the best chance of survival. I am a single mother and I have to do whatever I can to be around for my daughter.
Any advice?

u4art

get the urostomy ...least
get the urostomy ...least trouble .. I've had one for 20 yrs
get over the idea that " What guy would want me with a bag "
it just isn't so ... if he is worth anything ... he will see you for what you are and not for what you have on ....

....and remember ..." Baggies make better lovers "

brightstargal

curious as to what you did
I was just diagnosed with bladder cancer on March 16th. I am facing all the decisions you had to make. I am leaning toward neoadjuvant chemo then cystectomy 3 months later. Tell me what you've learned. thanks