Does it get easier

pattynonews
pattynonews Member Posts: 176
edited March 2014 in Caregivers #1
They say each day gets easier, but i dont see that, i cry all the time, I went back to my old job but there are so many memories just from work, I use to rush home and Jack would be waiting for me, so i just want to know what happens to the caretaker once we lose our love ones, I have notice once Jack passed alot of the people who would say Im here for you but now jack has passed i dont here from them, Im not sure if i went back to work to fast, and have not actually mourn jack but the bills dont stop either, Im just so lost without Jack , and I am trying so hard to be strong,

Comments

  • angelsbaby
    angelsbaby Member Posts: 1,165 Member
    #2
    It
    is to soon for you, Angel has been gone 7 months and i still cry everyday it is getting alittle better but not much for me,I went back to work 3 weeks after and passed that was weird at first but it did seem to help keep my mind on something other then angel being gone.And i too didn't have the time to mourn angel either because of all the drama with my son who is on meth our harley being repo house up for a short sale and that all started 2 months after angel passed . But look at me i go to work everyday and come home to an empty house and it does take all your strength to get threw each day and i am trying . I am sorry this is so hard for you but i can realte and i hope you take care of yourself and try to be strong. I tell you us women can find that strength we have found it many times in our lives. Good luck to you .And i am so sorry we lost the loves of our lifes. It is devestating.

    michelle N
  • Pitapocket
    Pitapocket Member Posts: 16
    #3
    They say it gets easier with
    They say it gets easier with time. My dad and I were very close. He has been gone for just over 2 years. I still cry. Not every day. But often. Every morning when I wake up, the very first thought is that he's gone. Here is what I have noticed about my grief: When they first pass away, it hits hard. The hurt is constant for a while. As time goes by, you may have 1 good day of the week. Then, maybe 2 good days. And so on. Pretty soon, all 7 days are fairly good, but within those days, you have moments of sadness. So, allow your moments. It's okay. Once we have lost someone that we were so extremely close with, we are NEVER the same. It hurts. But we learn a new normal that is bittersweet, because a piece of us went with that person. Hang in there. And don't be hard on yourself. You have to go through this at your pace, not everyone elses. Blessings to you.
  • Gracie44
    Gracie44 Member Posts: 2
    #4
    I lost my first husband to
    I lost my first husband to cancer when he was 39. Now my second husband has cancer at age 59. All of the feelings are coming back from when my first husband died. It took me years to even think about looking at another man even though I was only in my thirties. It does get easier with time,but I think when you truly love someone it seems like it will never get easier. I remember my old friends being there for awhile after he died, but eventually they all drifted away. I did make new friends, and I hope and pray they will stick by me now and later if I need them. I do know just how you feel. People keep telling me to be strong, but sometimes crying is all I can do. I tend to be a very private person and don't talk much about my feelings, so I am glad we now have computors and message boards to vent. It seems to help me some. I am sorry for your loss and all of your pain.
  • grandmafay
    grandmafay Member Posts: 1,633 Member
    #5
    Gracie44 said:

    I lost my first husband to
    I lost my first husband to cancer when he was 39. Now my second husband has cancer at age 59. All of the feelings are coming back from when my first husband died. It took me years to even think about looking at another man even though I was only in my thirties. It does get easier with time,but I think when you truly love someone it seems like it will never get easier. I remember my old friends being there for awhile after he died, but eventually they all drifted away. I did make new friends, and I hope and pray they will stick by me now and later if I need them. I do know just how you feel. People keep telling me to be strong, but sometimes crying is all I can do. I tend to be a very private person and don't talk much about my feelings, so I am glad we now have computors and message boards to vent. It seems to help me some. I am sorry for your loss and all of your pain.

    Gracie44, I'm sorry you are going through this again. Once is more than enough. Take care, Fay

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