Stage 4 Breast Cancer Survivor---Seeking encouragement and Hope

spoonchek
spoonchek Member Posts: 30
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
I was just wondering if anyone knows of any positive, optimistic stories about women living with metastatic breast cancer (to bone)being treated with Herceptin and Zometa and living an actual life of some years. This is my situation and I am struggling not to feel as though my life is running out like an hourglass. I've heard a couple of stories about women surviving for some years on these treatments but I thought I'd throw it out here to see if anyone can provide some positive feedback on the subject.

I appreciate whatever anyone can offer as I'm having a very difficult time managing my way through each day without despair taking over and paralyzing me.

Teri
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Comments

  • fauxma
    fauxma Member Posts: 3,577 Member
    #2
    TeriMy heart goes out to
    Teri
    My heart goes out to you. I know that we have some Stage IV ladies that will be popping in and telling you how they are doing. It is so hard to just hear the word cancer and I can't imagine how I would feel if I heard stage 4 and mets.
    But I have had several primary cancers and the way I cope is to try and enjoy each day as a gift. It works 99% of the time and they are a gift. For whatever time you might have, you want to relish it, live it, and make the very most of it. Follow your treatment plan and do whatever you can to help you through the despair. Because you want quality as much as you want quantity. None of us knows where these cancers will lead us or when we will die and as long as you are here you should be able to embrace your life, your time. I know that this is all easier said than done. You may want to work with a counsellor or therapist. And don't be afraid to ocassionally vent, rant, cry. This can also help to relieve the stress, the fear. But what you don't want is for this diagnosis to rob you of all the todays you still have ahead of you.
    My prayers are being sent to you that you find peace and that our sisters here will share their positive and uplifting stories. I know that Kathi here has a inspiring story as do several others.
    Stef
  • spoonchek
    spoonchek Member Posts: 30
    #3
    fauxma said:

    TeriMy heart goes out to
    Teri
    My heart goes out to you. I know that we have some Stage IV ladies that will be popping in and telling you how they are doing. It is so hard to just hear the word cancer and I can't imagine how I would feel if I heard stage 4 and mets.
    But I have had several primary cancers and the way I cope is to try and enjoy each day as a gift. It works 99% of the time and they are a gift. For whatever time you might have, you want to relish it, live it, and make the very most of it. Follow your treatment plan and do whatever you can to help you through the despair. Because you want quality as much as you want quantity. None of us knows where these cancers will lead us or when we will die and as long as you are here you should be able to embrace your life, your time. I know that this is all easier said than done. You may want to work with a counsellor or therapist. And don't be afraid to ocassionally vent, rant, cry. This can also help to relieve the stress, the fear. But what you don't want is for this diagnosis to rob you of all the todays you still have ahead of you.
    My prayers are being sent to you that you find peace and that our sisters here will share their positive and uplifting stories. I know that Kathi here has a inspiring story as do several others.
    Stef

    Thank you so much for your
    Thank you so much for your words Stef as I read them and take them into my heart. Just joined this website today in search of connections and so you are my first and I'm very grateful. You are of course correct in focusing on my "todays" and not worrying about the quantity of "tomorrows" I have ahead of me....again as you said, a tough task at times. Thank you for your prayers and thoughts.

    Teri
  • jennytwist
    jennytwist Member Posts: 896
    #4
    spoonchek said:

    Thank you so much for your
    Thank you so much for your words Stef as I read them and take them into my heart. Just joined this website today in search of connections and so you are my first and I'm very grateful. You are of course correct in focusing on my "todays" and not worrying about the quantity of "tomorrows" I have ahead of me....again as you said, a tough task at times. Thank you for your prayers and thoughts.

    Teri

    Welcome!
    You've come to the right place for lots of love and sharing!
    I know someone who has had your same diagnosis. She's been on various treatments over at least five years and is still doing fine! I know she goes on and off chemo at different times - when I found out about my BC she was there for me and encouraged me to come to her support group. As I live in a different town and am back to working full time I haven't visited her group yet.
    It's OK to be overwhelmed, angry, sad, discouraged! Take any and all the help and support you can get! Stay positive - you'll find you can come here anytime and someone is always here to "listen" and give encouragment! We're all in this together! I'll keep you in my prayers!
    -Jenny
  • spoonchek
    spoonchek Member Posts: 30
    #5
    jennytwist said:

    Welcome!
    You've come to the right place for lots of love and sharing!
    I know someone who has had your same diagnosis. She's been on various treatments over at least five years and is still doing fine! I know she goes on and off chemo at different times - when I found out about my BC she was there for me and encouraged me to come to her support group. As I live in a different town and am back to working full time I haven't visited her group yet.
    It's OK to be overwhelmed, angry, sad, discouraged! Take any and all the help and support you can get! Stay positive - you'll find you can come here anytime and someone is always here to "listen" and give encouragment! We're all in this together! I'll keep you in my prayers!
    -Jenny

    God Bless you for taking the
    God Bless you for taking the time to reply and write your words.....It so helps to get a reply so compassionate and caring....I can't tell you how much I appreciate it as I've been struggling so much lately to get through each day.
  • New Flower
    New Flower Member Posts: 4,294
    #6
    jennytwist said:

    Welcome!
    You've come to the right place for lots of love and sharing!
    I know someone who has had your same diagnosis. She's been on various treatments over at least five years and is still doing fine! I know she goes on and off chemo at different times - when I found out about my BC she was there for me and encouraged me to come to her support group. As I live in a different town and am back to working full time I haven't visited her group yet.
    It's OK to be overwhelmed, angry, sad, discouraged! Take any and all the help and support you can get! Stay positive - you'll find you can come here anytime and someone is always here to "listen" and give encouragment! We're all in this together! I'll keep you in my prayers!
    -Jenny

    Teri
    welcome. Yes I have met several stage IV breast cancer survivors at the acupuncture training seminar.
    I was surprised how optimistic and good-looking they were. I draw an inspirational example from knowing them. We have several ladies with similar diagnosis here as well. I hope they will respond to your post.
    I myself have had stage IIIC and still recovering from my treatments.
    Hugs
  • MyTurnNow
    MyTurnNow Member Posts: 2,686 Member
    #7
    Teri, just wanted to welcome
    Teri, just wanted to welcome you to the site. I don't have the same dx but am in the process of going through treatments now. I have completed my chemo and just started radiation. You will be glad you came here, this site is filled with compassionate, caring, supportive, and knowledgeable women, along with a few men. We're here for you 24/7. I'll send well wishes your way too!! Take care.
  • mimivac
    mimivac Member Posts: 2,143 Member
    #8
    Yes, yes, yes
    There are plenty of women who live many years with metastatic breast cancer, especially if the mets is to the bone alone. There are women on these boards who have been around for over a decade and more who are stable and live extremely full lives with mets. I totally understand that you feel so scared and despairing. Please post here and get to know these wonderful women. You are not alone.

    Mimi
  • Sunrae
    Sunrae Member Posts: 808
    #9
    Welcome too
    Just wanted to welcome you to this site too. I don't have the same dx as you either. I'm fairly new here, recently diagnosed with 3 tumors in right breast and node involvement, on hormore therapy to reduce the tumors so I can have surgery. I'm sure you will find ladies here who have had a similar dx as yours. There are incredibly courageous and caring people here who really have the heart to help and support all of us. Sorry that you're going thru this. Please know that many people here are with you in your struggle and our prayers are with you. Hoping for better days soon for you.
  • m_azingrace
    m_azingrace Member Posts: 399
    #10
    Sunrae said:

    Welcome too
    Just wanted to welcome you to this site too. I don't have the same dx as you either. I'm fairly new here, recently diagnosed with 3 tumors in right breast and node involvement, on hormore therapy to reduce the tumors so I can have surgery. I'm sure you will find ladies here who have had a similar dx as yours. There are incredibly courageous and caring people here who really have the heart to help and support all of us. Sorry that you're going thru this. Please know that many people here are with you in your struggle and our prayers are with you. Hoping for better days soon for you.

    Teri
    My DX was made in July. Stage 4, with mets to bone, so it seems we are on similar paths together. My oncologist is "cautiously optimistic" that I might look forward to years of continued health. What I have is a chronic disease that can be treated and managed. I'm on Femara and Zometa. I seem to be tolerating both well. Except for the cancer, I have no other health issues, so that's a real plus.
    This is a terrific support system here, with many gracious ladies willing to be our gentle guides. Hugs to you. Gracie
  • Tux
    Tux Member Posts: 544
    #11
    Welcome, Teri. I have not
    Welcome, Teri. I have not had the same dx as you, but I wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you & praying for you.

    Hugs & prayers...
  • Booberta
    Booberta Member Posts: 61
    #12
    Tux said:

    Welcome, Teri. I have not
    Welcome, Teri. I have not had the same dx as you, but I wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you & praying for you.

    Hugs & prayers...

    Welcome
    Teri-I'm so glad you're here. I've heard great things about Zometa in terms of helping with the bone mets and oddly enough, my surgeon says that studies have shown that it helps to decrease the risk of bc recurrance. Everyone here is pulling for you.

    If you want to tell us al little about yourself.

    Best wishes
  • BELIEVEx3
    BELIEVEx3 Member Posts: 24
    #13
    HOPE
    Dear Teri,
    Hope lives here on these pages for you and all of us..............YES I have heard of women living full happy lives with the chronicity of
    metastatic breast cancer to the bone..It almost seem counterintuitive mets to the bone and life, but we have come so far with our treatments in the last several years........Do you have a close family member or friend to confide in?To hold your hand when you are afraid and feel like you cannot bare another moment??I hope that you do. If you do not, I pray that you find warmth and comfort here.

    Please share your sadness with your Oncologist, sometimes they forget that we need just that one voice from someone that has survived before us....and is still alive. Recently I met a gal that has a sister with stage 4 and bone mets and has been treated for the last 2 years, sometimes including a bit of radiation. She is doing well and recently spent a week in New York shopping and enjoying the theater district........I have had several cancers and such a rare disease that I cannot bare not knowing anyone else with it, that is why I started posting lately. It gives me hope to hear the stories of such remarkable women. I pray this site does the same for you.
    Believe!!
  • RE
    RE Member Posts: 4,591 Member
    #14
    Stage 4
    Hi Teri, I am a stage 4 survivor. My mets were not to the bone but to the chest wall and sentinel node. I got the stage 4 dx in 98 and am going strong. I had a recurrance in 07, had chemo and surgery and am doing well today. I live a full live with grandkids who love to play with me, we go camping and travel whenever possible. There is life to be lived and I believe you will get there. I am so glad you found us, you will find that this board is filled with loving caring people who have walked in your shoes and understand.

    Hugs,

    RE
  • roseann4
    roseann4 Member Posts: 992 Member
    #15
    Hi Teri!
    I know someone who has lived with Stage IV for 14 years. She has worked as a Nurse and has been able to continue for most of that time. A women in my support group has lived with Stage IV mets to her lungs for 7 years and is still going strong. She takes yoga once a week and her insturctor sais she is a star. She is in her early 70s! She volunteers her time giving support to chemo patients. I think the key to living with BC is having a full life for as long as we can. We must stay active and not allow fear to dominate of lives. No matter what stage cancer any of us is living with, the future is uncertain. It is also uncertain for everyone else but the difference is that we (bc survivors) know it. My goal is to make the most of each day and live in the now as much as possible. Not always easy!

    You came to the right place. Do something nice for yourself today. You deserve it!

    Roseann
  • LC815
    LC815 Member Posts: 155
    #16
    Me, too.
    Dear Teri,

    I just was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer (liver mets) a month ago and am taking Arimidex after having my ovaries out. I feel just like you. Very desperate. Today is the first day of being on this board, and I feel a little better already. You're not alone.
    HUGS,
    Linda
  • natly15
    natly15 Member Posts: 1,941
    #17
    Met a lady today at "Relay
    Met a lady today at "Relay for Life" who is absolutely flourishing with Stage IV metastatic breast cancer. I believe she is a 4 year survivor, has a wonderful attitude, beautiful smile and a deep faith. There is a saying, and you will find it quoted on these boards again, " I have cancer, the cancer doesnt have me! I'm praying for you Spoonchek and LC815. Hugs to both you ladies.
  • LC815
    LC815 Member Posts: 155
    #18
    natly15 said:

    Met a lady today at "Relay
    Met a lady today at "Relay for Life" who is absolutely flourishing with Stage IV metastatic breast cancer. I believe she is a 4 year survivor, has a wonderful attitude, beautiful smile and a deep faith. There is a saying, and you will find it quoted on these boards again, " I have cancer, the cancer doesnt have me! I'm praying for you Spoonchek and LC815. Hugs to both you ladies.

    Hugs back
    Thanks natly15 . . . I love the use of your word "flourishing." Teri, RE, a wonderful woman on these boards said something so wise to me (now, I hope I get it right): You are not a number or a statistic. You are Teri and therefore are unique. If you're like me, you get bogged down with the doom. Let's try to look for the light together!
    xoxo
    Linda
  • Eil4186
    Eil4186 Member Posts: 949
    #19
    Dear Teri, So very sorry to
    Dear Teri, So very sorry to read that you are so down. I can't imagine how difficult this for you. My heart breaks. I know I have read posts on here from others surviving stage four BC. The treatments are getting better and better. Stay strong my friend, we never know whats around the corner that will be the next miracle. Hugs, Eil
  • Jeanne D
    Jeanne D Member Posts: 1,867
    #20
    Eil4186 said:

    Dear Teri, So very sorry to
    Dear Teri, So very sorry to read that you are so down. I can't imagine how difficult this for you. My heart breaks. I know I have read posts on here from others surviving stage four BC. The treatments are getting better and better. Stay strong my friend, we never know whats around the corner that will be the next miracle. Hugs, Eil

    Teri
    I am also so sorry to read this post from you. I will certainly keep you in my prayers! I have had bc twice now and go in next Wednesday to have 4 cysts removed to check. I am praying that they are benign. So, I know how scared you are, or, have some idea. Please take care!

    Love, Jeanne ♥
  • JmG86
    JmG86 Member Posts: 53
    #21
    Teri,
    I was diagnosed in
    Teri,
    I was diagnosed in 2003 with stage IV, mets to the bone. I have been living a normal, full, active life since. I have been treated with Zometa since 2003, and originally Femara but now Aromacin. I feel great. It's understandable your having a difficult time, but don't despair! I love the saying "You can't just sit around and wait for the storm to be over - you have to learn how to dance in the rain". So I choose to dance, and I choose to sing. I have my bad days, but I can't dwell there, that's a bad place to be. I think everyone has that hourglass - who knows how much sand anyone has left? I'm a klutz - I might fall out the front door tomorrow on my way to work, and that's all she wrote. You never know! But I'm going out that door, there's still so much to see and do. So I'll try not to let the storm scare me, I'll just look for the rainbow. It's there somewhere!

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