`120 days after surgery

DONCARLOS

Yesterday I completed 120 days since my surgery. I paid the first visit to my Oncologist Since he had my OSTREOSCAN back in August.. He keeps calling me lucky, because as he said. "77 years old and you are free of any cancer in your system" Yet I still feel very depressed. My Onc. says that it is normal and that only a person who had cancer can appreciate what it means to survive. He also called it GOOD CANCER....because it is the one that is not aggressive. I really feel very good and I do not have any feeling of surgery or ever having cancer except for a little short of breath at times...BUT I CANNOT SHAKE THIS DEPRESSION AND feel that "WELL ITS ONLY A MATTER OF TIME AND IT WILL BE OVER" Meaning "waiting for death" My PCP Put me on PROZAC"???? I know am wrong but that is the way I feel and my Onc claims that is normal. My Onc. is having a meeting on 11-3-09 to discuss CANCER SURVIVAL AND LEARNING HOW TO LIVE WITH CANCER SURVIVORS AND THEIR FEELINGS. It is a good feeling to know that I will never need any treatment like Radiation, or Chemo. I just wanted you all to know that after 120 days I am doing OK except MENTALLY, and My oncologist says that I will overcome all of that and will be well the rest of my life, which he sees as a long one despite my 77 years.

Learning to be happy.....


DON CARLOS