GOOFYLADIE Member Posts: 232 Member
edited March 2014 in Colorectal Cancer #1
A few months before I found out I had cancer I did a few strange things. Well for me they were strange. I started buying Angel and Cherub pictures and I redecorated my livingroom. It hadn't been long since I had organized all the kids pictures and family photos and few musical instrument pictures on the walls. I started seeing pictures of Angels and Cherubs in a different way. Bigger, brighter, magnificient way. Kind of like they were watching over me. I soon filled my living room with home interiors and other expensive art store photos. Totally, not my original style. I am a believer, but not a holy roller. I think people can take it over the top, and forget who God is. Anyway, just thought I would throw that out there to see if anyone else had anything like that.

It was like I had Angels watching over me in my home when my family and friends could not be there to help. It was a little odd at first and then I realized angels are from heaven. YEAH, I know where Im going if I go. And I really was never scared.

There was only one time in the hospital I was truly scared. I am 6ft tall and I was weighing about 118 pounds. My eyes were sunk in my head, I looked like a walking skeleton; when I wasn't curled up in bed in the fetal position. I looked in the mirror at the hospital room one day and I really thought I saw my ghost. I just remembered thinking and saying to myself. "Oh hell no, your not getting me that easy, I have 3 boys at home waiting for me and husband that is just lost right now." I never felt that way again.

I have 11 years cancer free, with all kinds of side effects and health issues. They are pretty sure it is from the hard **** Chemo. I told the doc make it so I don't have to come back. So far, it hasn't; but it has played hell with my body.

Everyone keep posting. You don't know how much it makes me feel normal, when I here you guys say all things I went through and felt but didn't have this atmosphere to go too. This is truly a huge benefactor to cancer patients. If you don't post. Your missing out. Even if you don't think you have something to say; sometimes one word matches with someone struggling. Lots of kick **** going your way. Make it a Great Day!
Goofyladie (Cass)


  • Sundanceh
    Sundanceh Member Posts: 4,392 Member
    Hey Cass :)
    Read you reply to my post - you told me that you appreciated me talking about the things you wished you could have 11-years ago but had no forum.

    I can relate to this, because even though there was a forum I did not know about it for the first 5 years of my cancer battle - I found the board on my 5th year, almost to the DAY of my 1st cancer Dx. Now, how's that for a story.

    So, I've only been on board a little over 3 months and have thrown out 550 posts! So, I guess what I'm trying to say, is I'm living out what you are trying to say...I've been slinging the hash :)

    Take care