I am kinda of in a funk today

mlmjt1
mlmjt1 Member Posts: 537
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
I feel kind of down in the dumps today. For starters, my youngest is off to college tomorrow so its the empty nest thing going on here today. I feel bad because I have been going thru mastectomy, a/c, taxol and herceptin and trying to work. I work full time and have been managing about 30 to 35 hours per week. I really havent been much help to him. My husbands retired so hes been doing all the college stuff with him.

The other thing is this. I went to the pharmacy to pick up prescriptions after my herceptin today and it came up that I was her2 positive. The pharmacist immediately said, oh thats really bad. Why do people do that??? Why do people constantly talk about all the people they know with cancer who died??? Dont they have a clue just how hard it is for those of us in the fight to stay positive? I really have been doing so well with the chemo, I am exercising and doing all the right things and all I can think of is why bother??? Its just going to come back anyway.

Forgive the whining...I try not to do that but its just put me in a down mood and I know if I have to vent this is the place to do it. I will get out of it and find my positive side again but it just bothered me today.

THanks for the ear

Linda T

Comments

  • dyaneb123
    dyaneb123 Member Posts: 950
    You know Linda....I've had
    You know Linda....I've had that same experience with people wanting to tell me about people dying from cancer all the time. My best girlfriend wanted me to come help her sing at the funeral for a neighbor of hers who had just passed away from cancer. I'd never met her.
    Well I don't plan on going any time soon! And neither do you girl....! Tell them so!WE ARE SURVIVORS!!!
  • mimivac
    mimivac Member Posts: 2,143
    Linda,
    That pharmacist is a jerk. And for her information, there is Herceptin now, so being HER2 positive is no longer considered "the bad kind." You're fighting a battle that can be so incredibly depressing, but it is absolutely worth it. You are worth it. Your children and husband love and need you. Don't let the horror stories get to you. There are plenty of good stories of survival, too. Plenty. Hope you feel better soon.

    Mimi
  • Kat11
    Kat11 Member Posts: 1,931 Member
    mimivac said:

    Linda,
    That pharmacist is a jerk. And for her information, there is Herceptin now, so being HER2 positive is no longer considered "the bad kind." You're fighting a battle that can be so incredibly depressing, but it is absolutely worth it. You are worth it. Your children and husband love and need you. Don't let the horror stories get to you. There are plenty of good stories of survival, too. Plenty. Hope you feel better soon.

    Mimi

    Sometimes I think that
    Sometimes I think that people just don't think. My MRI tech felt she had to tell me while getting me ready for the test that her aunt and neice died of BC. Sorry this happened to you. Hope your day got better.
  • VickiSam
    VickiSam Member Posts: 9,079 Member
    dyaneb123 said:

    You know Linda....I've had
    You know Linda....I've had that same experience with people wanting to tell me about people dying from cancer all the time. My best girlfriend wanted me to come help her sing at the funeral for a neighbor of hers who had just passed away from cancer. I'd never met her.
    Well I don't plan on going any time soon! And neither do you girl....! Tell them so!WE ARE SURVIVORS!!!

    I agree we are SURVIVORS .. I too am Her2 positive
    Her2 positive and I will survive. I will not allow anyone to make or break my spirit. If things get too much for me .. I pray, blog, sing, dance .. or pray again.


    VickiSam
  • elm3544
    elm3544 Member Posts: 748
    Perfectly stated by Mimi.
    I

    Perfectly stated by Mimi.
    I guess we all encounter people who are going to say something without thinking. Luckily we all have each other right here!
  • lovelylola
    lovelylola Member Posts: 279
    The pharmacist simply did
    The pharmacist simply did not remember to "think before you speak" something I try to teach the challenging children I work with. I'm sorry you had to deal with their inappropriateness. However, the other posts are right, you are a survivor. I had a metal trivet (one of those old kind that sat on my wood stove for years). My ex-husband gave it to me and it was kinda a joke around our house. It said "Be sure brain is engaged before mouth is put in motion!" I always think about it when I hear stories of people who "pop wheelies" because they are stepping on the accelerator (using their mouths) before they've put it in gear (used their brain). They're just revving their noisy engines. Dumb as this may sound, it does help me put their "wheelies" in prespective.
    Have a great weekend, pamper yourself and remember "you are a SURVIVOR!" Sending internet hugs, Lola
  • Calleen
    Calleen Member Posts: 411

    The pharmacist simply did
    The pharmacist simply did not remember to "think before you speak" something I try to teach the challenging children I work with. I'm sorry you had to deal with their inappropriateness. However, the other posts are right, you are a survivor. I had a metal trivet (one of those old kind that sat on my wood stove for years). My ex-husband gave it to me and it was kinda a joke around our house. It said "Be sure brain is engaged before mouth is put in motion!" I always think about it when I hear stories of people who "pop wheelies" because they are stepping on the accelerator (using their mouths) before they've put it in gear (used their brain). They're just revving their noisy engines. Dumb as this may sound, it does help me put their "wheelies" in prespective.
    Have a great weekend, pamper yourself and remember "you are a SURVIVOR!" Sending internet hugs, Lola

    I think
    We have all felt just what you are feeling.. I had a post going about stupid things people say.. called "What not to say to a Cancer Patient"... It's amazing what people say without thinking!!

    So sorry your feeling down!!! I remember when my youngest Daughter left home.. I sooo didn't want her to go... But our kids do grow up and become adults... Then they give us blessings of wonderful grandchildren to Love who think WE are the greatest in the World!!! The you get to wishing you could have had them first!!!

    You have so much to look forward to..
  • chenheart
    chenheart Member Posts: 5,159
    Oh Sweetie.....you are soooo
    Oh Sweetie.....you are soooo entitled to wear the crown of Queen of The Pity Party~you have come to the right place! You don't get to own that crown for long; it gets passed around in here faster than Musical Chairs! But have the seat of honor and I will get you a mega glass of cyber-champagne! You deserve it!!!!!

    You would be affected by empty nest regardless...the cumulative fatigue and all else which accompanies the Beast Battle is only exacerbating your feelings.

    And the pharmacist??? OMG~ well hey! That's like saying deoderant is a waste of money for fat women who sweat...we're gonna sweat anyway. I mean really! Who are these ppl, anyway??????

    I am glad there is a place to vent and be honest...we so Get It! As my Reggie says: Get your GRRRRRRR on!

    Hugs,
    Chen♥
  • Moopy23
    Moopy23 Member Posts: 1,751 Member
    Linda
    I am sorry that foolish pharmacist said such a thing. As Mimi wrote, Herceptin is a powerful drug that makes all the difference with Her2/Neu positive cancers. In fact, my oncologist told me that my being negative for Her2/Neu is unfortunate because Herceptin won't help me. So, that pharmacist is not up to date on cancer-related drugs. He/she is not only thoughtless but also ignorant.

    As for "whining," you are not whining. Anyway, all of us need a pity party for ourselves now and then, as Claudia wrote.

    My best wishes to your son as he begins his college career. You must be proud of him.
  • Akiss4me
    Akiss4me Member Posts: 2,188
    Yeah...what everyone else said!
    And hoping you are hanging in there till you feel better. Cancer sucks! I hope you feel better soon! Pammy
  • Tux
    Tux Member Posts: 544
    Moopy23 said:

    Linda
    I am sorry that foolish pharmacist said such a thing. As Mimi wrote, Herceptin is a powerful drug that makes all the difference with Her2/Neu positive cancers. In fact, my oncologist told me that my being negative for Her2/Neu is unfortunate because Herceptin won't help me. So, that pharmacist is not up to date on cancer-related drugs. He/she is not only thoughtless but also ignorant.

    As for "whining," you are not whining. Anyway, all of us need a pity party for ourselves now and then, as Claudia wrote.

    My best wishes to your son as he begins his college career. You must be proud of him.

    I am also sorry that the
    I am also sorry that the pharmacist made such a comment to you--same thing has happened to me numerous times since my dx. Unfortunately, I find myself trying to avoid those people since their comments were so unfeeling.

    Please do not feel bad about not being able to help your son get ready for college. I have been a teacher for nearly 40 years & I am continually amazed at how tough & resilient kids are. I wish him the best as he makes his way in life. I also wish you the best in your fight against bc.
  • tommaseena
    tommaseena Member Posts: 1,769
    Akiss4me said:

    Yeah...what everyone else said!
    And hoping you are hanging in there till you feel better. Cancer sucks! I hope you feel better soon! Pammy

    My experience
    My experience was with a local newspaper. They came to the barber shop when I had my head shaved and my son Jake had a buzz cut and did a story. Well the picture was on the front page but the story was right beside the obit's. I did write a letter to the editor but never go a response.

    Margo