Jack and Jill went up the hill

tommaseena
tommaseena Member Posts: 1,769
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
Jack was going to be married to Jill, so his father sat him down for a little fireside chat.....

He said "Jack, let me tell you something. On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my pants and handed them to your mother, and said, 'Here, try these on.'

"So, she did and said, 'These are too big, I can't wear them.'

"I replied, 'Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will.'

"Ever since that night we have never had any problems."

"Hmmm, "said Jack. He thought that might be a good thing to try. So on his honeymoon, Jack took off his pants and said to Jill, "Here try these on."

So she did and said, "These are too large, they don't fit me."

Jack said, "Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will, and I don't want you to ever forget that."

Then Jill took off her pants and handed them to Jack and said, "Here, you try on mine."

So he did and said, "I can't get into your pants."

Jill said, "Exactly. And if you don't change your smart **** attitude, you never will."

Comments

  • lanie940
    lanie940 Member Posts: 490
    LOL! OK, here's one. The
    LOL! OK, here's one. The wife was out in the garden pulling some weeds. The Husband was getting the grill(one of those smaller sized webber types). He looked at his wife's behind and said Geez honey, your rear is as big as the grill! She silently fumed, thinking i'll get back at you for that remark. Later that evening when they were in bed, he apologized for his unkind remark and wanted some sex. She said, "If you think I'm going to fire up this grill for one small weiner, your're NUTS!" Guess that told him!
  • lolad
    lolad Member Posts: 670
    lanie940 said:

    LOL! OK, here's one. The
    LOL! OK, here's one. The wife was out in the garden pulling some weeds. The Husband was getting the grill(one of those smaller sized webber types). He looked at his wife's behind and said Geez honey, your rear is as big as the grill! She silently fumed, thinking i'll get back at you for that remark. Later that evening when they were in bed, he apologized for his unkind remark and wanted some sex. She said, "If you think I'm going to fire up this grill for one small weiner, your're NUTS!" Guess that told him!

    OMG
    Loved them both!! Women power is right! Where do you get all these funny jokes? You have know idea how much i enjoy them because they always make me laugh. Please keep em coming. Your awesome

    laura
  • Ritzy
    Ritzy Member Posts: 4,381 Member
    lolad said:

    OMG
    Loved them both!! Women power is right! Where do you get all these funny jokes? You have know idea how much i enjoy them because they always make me laugh. Please keep em coming. Your awesome

    laura

    LoL!

    LoL!
  • survivorbc09
    survivorbc09 Member Posts: 4,374 Member
    Ritzy said:

    LoL!

    LoL!

    They both are funny!
    They both are funny! Thanks!
  • VickiSam
    VickiSam Member Posts: 9,079 Member
    lanie940 said:

    LOL! OK, here's one. The
    LOL! OK, here's one. The wife was out in the garden pulling some weeds. The Husband was getting the grill(one of those smaller sized webber types). He looked at his wife's behind and said Geez honey, your rear is as big as the grill! She silently fumed, thinking i'll get back at you for that remark. Later that evening when they were in bed, he apologized for his unkind remark and wanted some sex. She said, "If you think I'm going to fire up this grill for one small weiner, your're NUTS!" Guess that told him!

    Still LOL
    Thanks Ladies for making my day a little brighter.

    VickiSam