Not ignoring you, I promise

Akiss4me
Akiss4me Member Posts: 2,188
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
Hello my dear sisters. Just a quick note to let everyone know I am not ignoring you, but am dealing with many issues that need my immediate attention. I think someone once said not only do we have cancer to deal with, but cancer & finances, cancer & relationships, cancer & life, etc. I think I was given the honor of dealing with cancer & the universe all at one time!!
I missed welcoming a lot of new sisters aboard. I missed welcoming home the vacationers. I missed congratulating many milestones. I missed letting sisters know that you are in my thoughts as you go along your journey. I missed letting you know I am there for you even if I'm not commenting.
I know things will utimately get taken care of and I will be able to be back posting my usual upbeat comments. Right at the moment it is difficult to be focused on everything I need to be and stay upbeat. Rads (22 down, 14 more to go!) is dragging my butt on top of everything else. I am soooooo tired!!! I am trying to read to keep up whenever I get a chance. You still make me laugh, cry, contemplate, and occasionally (oopps!) I have fallen asleep with you on my lap!
I keep telling myself that Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass...it's about learning to dance in the rain! Right now, I am dancing in the rain (but just not very gracefully!).
I am still addressing some health issues, mother had a stroke, husband is not well, and of all things depositions for a legal matter from last year (car accident) is being pushed to be done NOW by the defendant. I managed to delay them till I finished radiation but not by much. This of course is just a legal tactic on their part, since they have access to my medical records and know I am in treatment, hoping I will cave in. They certainly misread me!! If I can fight cancer, they are cookie crumbs by comparison!
Well, keep me in your prayers and send some strength my way! I can use it both mentally and physically. Thank you all for being there for me (through all the post I've read) even when you didn't know you were! Hopefully it won't be long before I am back full force! Lots of hugs to everyone! Pammy

Comments

  • fauxma
    fauxma Member Posts: 3,577 Member
    Pammy
    So glad you have only

    Pammy
    So glad you have only 14 more rads. Yes, it can kick your butt. And I hate when the universe needs attention, don't you? And even more, I hate when Sleazy people use your health issues to put pressure on you in hopes you will cave. They do not know our Pammy or they would have cried UNCLE long ago. You do whatever you need to take care of yourself, your family and the universe. My mom had a picture in her office that said, We cannot change the wind, we can only adjust our sails. I like your learning to dance in the rain.
    HOping that everything comes out right in the end and we will have your advice, your humor and your care and concern back with us. Not to mention the Rad B's.
    Prayers and good thoughts for you.
    Stef
  • tjhay
    tjhay Member Posts: 655
    Ok Pammy
    Ok Pammy, you take care of what needs taking care of and we will keep you in our prayers and will be sending you some extra energy
    tjhay
  • traceyt
    traceyt Member Posts: 77
    Oh Pammy
    I was wondering what happend...was looking for your lastest rads update last night. I hate that you have to deal with all this on top of the cancer :( Your usual upbeat self is missed but you are also allowed to have those days to just vent!!
    Sending you strength and lots of gentle ((hugs))
    Tracey
  • tgf
    tgf Member Posts: 950 Member
    traceyt said:

    Oh Pammy
    I was wondering what happend...was looking for your lastest rads update last night. I hate that you have to deal with all this on top of the cancer :( Your usual upbeat self is missed but you are also allowed to have those days to just vent!!
    Sending you strength and lots of gentle ((hugs))
    Tracey

    Pammy
    We've missed you ... but now understand what has been going on. I'm sure there are times when it does seem like you have the weight of the universe on your shoulders ... but you have proven over and over again how strong you are ... and you will get through this.

    Hopefully you'll be free of the "external stress" soon. In the meantime ... please take care of yourself.

    And ... we're here for you ...

    big hugs.
    teena
  • outdoorgirl
    outdoorgirl Member Posts: 1,565
    Pammy,
    sorry that the weight of the world is on your shoulders,and that your mom and hubby are not doing well and the fact that you are still doing rads!Sorry that your mother had a stroke. I hope that she and your hubby are feeling better soon! I hope also that everything else works out well for you!
    Praying for light at the end of your tunnel,
    Patty
  • whichwitch
    whichwitch Member Posts: 42
    OMG You are always in my
    OMG You are always in my thoughts and prayers. Know that we are dancing with you in this storm. Wish I could do something to help you!!! So, all I have is hugs and sending angels to help.
  • taleena
    taleena Member Posts: 1,612 Member
    Pammy... I have been
    Pammy... I have been thinking about you. And trust me, I understand about dealing with cancer and "everything that happens in between"... I have been dealing with my ex-sister-in-law, and the custody issue with my niece. Looks like we have finally come to an agreement on settling it all... holding my breath until it's finally filed with the courts... anyway... hang in there..

    I too have been lagging in the response department and do want to make sure that everyone is welcomed... If I missed posting to your thread and your new..."Welcome... you've come to the right place with wonderful amazing people".... I've been trying to stay up on all the positive celebratory news... lagging there too probably...

    I'm sorry your so tired... go easy on yourself... rest when you need to... and take advantage of those pampering techniques you have so finely tuned...lol... I will be watching for you!

    ♥ & hugs,

    ~T
  • prv
    prv Member Posts: 107

    OMG You are always in my
    OMG You are always in my thoughts and prayers. Know that we are dancing with you in this storm. Wish I could do something to help you!!! So, all I have is hugs and sending angels to help.

    how strong!
    I can't believe how strong you and the other gals are on this site! Good luck and hope everything improves soon!
  • mimivac
    mimivac Member Posts: 2,143
    You've been missed!
    Pammy, I am glad you wrote and sorry to hear about the obstacles life is throwing your way. You are right to focus on other things right now. Know that we will be right here for you when you decide to return. My best wishes for you, your mother, husband, and the legal matters you are dealing with. Please let us know what is going on if it will help you to process and deal with everything.

    Mimi
  • butterfly343
    butterfly343 Member Posts: 39
    Oh Pammy!
    I am so sorry to

    Oh Pammy!
    I am so sorry to hear of all your troubles. I know that you will rise to any challange thrown your way. You are a strong woman and we will all be here for you. You are in my prayers and thoughts.
    Julie
  • lolad
    lolad Member Posts: 670
    I was wondering
    what happened to you. I noticed that you hadnt posted in a while and was worried. I hope that things get better. Its been a roller coster of emotions for me too, so know that you are never alone. Take care of yourself and your family. Sorry to hear all the issues that are happening. Fighting this and treatments are enough to handle and you have a whole lot more on your plate. No wonder you are feeling so overwhelmed. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Take care of yourself and im looking forward to when you can start posting again. I love your sense of humor and your posts. They always make me smile.

    take care
    laura
  • chenheart
    chenheart Member Posts: 5,159
    Sheesh~ Life happening in
    Sheesh~ Life happening in the middle of Beast-Slaying...how rude! :-)

    I personally give you the Official Reprive from having to post about that 1 minute of your daily life called rads. Let us know when you have 2 or 3 more to go and the Ta-da moment of FINISHING! ( just a suggestion, of course, post anytime you want!)

    I don't need to tell you how draining this whole Beast-Slaying is, physically and emotionally. It isn't easy to take care of YOURSELF, and of course the demands of daily living. My heart is with you; our personal world doesn't stop revolving while we are getting strong and healthy; of course you have to be there for the people in your life. And circumstances outside of this place. We understand fully!

    Peace and strength be with you...check in with us when you can. And know that we love you!
    Hugs,
    Chen♥
  • chickad52
    chickad52 Member Posts: 497
    Pammy
    Sorry, that you have so much on your plate to deal with. Your in my prayers! Diane:)
  • Akiss4me
    Akiss4me Member Posts: 2,188
    In a sentence
    You all are awesome angels!! Pammy
  • aurora2009
    aurora2009 Member Posts: 544 Member
    chickad52 said:

    Pammy
    Sorry, that you have so much on your plate to deal with. Your in my prayers! Diane:)

    Oh Pammy
    I was wondering why I hadn't seen any posts from you, my internet was down for almost a day and a half, so I'm just getting caught up, but I thought something was wrong. And someone special was missing!

    I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers, I hope your mother will be okay, and that your husband feels better soon.

    Just be sure to take care of you, even though we all miss you, we want you to get the rest you need.

    God Bless You Pammy, I'll be thinking of you.

    Aurora ♥
  • RE
    RE Member Posts: 4,591 Member
    HUGS TO PAMMY
    Thank you so much for the update I have missed you. Just 14 rads to go, how awesome is that!!! Trust that you, your husband and your mother are in my prayers!

    Lots of hugs,

    RE
  • Christmas Girl
    Christmas Girl Member Posts: 3,682 Member
    Take good care of yourself, Pammy...
    And all that stuff that's happening in your life right now. First priority.

    The board will always be here. We know you're with us, even if you're not posting. And, hopefully - you know we're thinking about you, too.

    Take good care.

    Kind regards, Susan