Forced menpause is turning me into a B****

tjhay

Ok so I am taking Tomox and my poor body is being forced in to menopause, and it is all I can do to keep myself from biting everyones head off that dares to speak to me. This is becoming a major issue. I want everyone to move out of the house, and its there house not mine.
I hate feeling this way, it seems that I am always angry, and frustrated. I am becoming such a B****. I realize that some of it has to do with the stress of dealing with cancer and all. My head doctor says that I need to work on communication skills, I personaly think I need a major sedative till all of this over with, and I can become human again.
I really don't know what to do, I have started isolating myself and we all know that is not the anwser. These feelings are really starting to get to me. I just can't handle it anymore.
Thanks for listining to me whine everyone. It you have any suggestions feel free to give them. At this point anything will help.

Tjhay

RE

GRRRRR
TJ tell you doctor, they can give you meds to help you deal with the anger issues. Just to give you a bit of hope this phase does not last, it will disappear in time. In the meantime get outside and out of the house, being indoors all the time will not help to ease your anger, go for a walk, swim or bike ride to wear yourself down a bit and to get those happy endorphens moving.

Hugs,

RE

Noel

RE said:

GRRRRR
TJ tell you doctor, they can give you meds to help you deal with the anger issues. Just to give you a bit of hope this phase does not last, it will disappear in time. In the meantime get outside and out of the house, being indoors all the time will not help to ease your anger, go for a walk, swim or bike ride to wear yourself down a bit and to get those happy endorphens moving.

Hugs,

RE

Yes, TJ, please call your
Yes, TJ, please call your doctor. You need something to help you to get thru this. An antidepressant or anxiety pill, something. Or, maybe they can adjust your tamox or something. But, RE is right. Get out of the house, do not isolate yourself. It will only make you worse. Please let your doctor know right away and let us know.

Hugs, Noel

Christmas Girl

Bummer!
I think many of us have been where you are now. As our dear RE posted, things do get better with time (as usual, with so many things), as everything balances out. You and your body are adjusting to both menopause and the Tamoxifen. In the meantime, please talk openly and honestly with your doctors - all of them. A temporary prescription for anxiety (or, whatever) may help.

Do you feel tired? I know that when I'm physically exhausted - my emotions tend to go haywire. On the other hand, even moderate exercise - a good walk, bike ride - can help to get a better night's sleep.

Best wishes to you, tjhay. Hope you get some relief soon.

Kind regards, Susan

rjjj

That happens
when our hormones get all out of whack. I remember when i had my hysterectomy, about 14 years ago, They thought my body was still making hormones and uh..well.. it wasn't! I went out of control, had a real melt-down. I am ususally very pleasant, but i threw a coffee cup across the room and it broke on the wall! well that's when they decided it was an emergency to get my poor bod some hormones. It really gets out of our control. But with the proper meds etc. it can be managed. I would ask the dr. for something. You are dealing with alot right now.

I know i isolated quite alot while in treatments, I just didn't feel good enough and didn't think i looked good enough to go very much. But my hair is growing back now, like yours (Go Girl) and you look good! Get out and do the things you enjoy, even getting that vit. D from the sun helps so much!!
Hugs, jackie

Jeanne D

rjjj said:

That happens
when our hormones get all out of whack. I remember when i had my hysterectomy, about 14 years ago, They thought my body was still making hormones and uh..well.. it wasn't! I went out of control, had a real melt-down. I am ususally very pleasant, but i threw a coffee cup across the room and it broke on the wall! well that's when they decided it was an emergency to get my poor bod some hormones. It really gets out of our control. But with the proper meds etc. it can be managed. I would ask the dr. for something. You are dealing with alot right now.

I know i isolated quite alot while in treatments, I just didn't feel good enough and didn't think i looked good enough to go very much. But my hair is growing back now, like yours (Go Girl) and you look good! Get out and do the things you enjoy, even getting that vit. D from the sun helps so much!!
Hugs, jackie

Tj, you have been given some
Tj, you have been given some very good advice already. I never went thru "the change", even though I stopped my period when I was 44. But, I know women that have thought they were going to lose their minds when they went thru it. The good thing is, they talked to their doctor's and got medication to help them thru it. And, you should do this too. Don't just let it get the best of you, call and get some help. There are a lot of medications that hopefully you will be able to try and see what works for you.

Also, your hair does look great! You look GREAT! I do like the GI JANE look on ya!

Hugs, Jeanne

Akiss4me

So this is what I get to look forward too?
I'm so sorry Tjhay that you are having to go through this. Please keep me updated and let me know what works for you because I am right behind you!! I am so not ready to go through menopause and Tamoxifen at the same time. I have created a healing room in antisipation that I may need a place to go to be away from everyone. I would hate myself if I took my symptoms out on my family or friends. I have decided to use painting for therapy. Just as long as they all don't come out dark, dreary, and scary!! Pammy

phoenixrising

I honestly cannot imagine
I honestly cannot imagine you being a b****. But you seem to think so, so something must be wrong for sure. One thing that might help is splitting your Tamoxifen and taking 1/2 in the am and 1/2 at night. This made a huge difference in my mood. Another thing, if you go on anti-depressants, don't take an SSRI as they interfere with the metabolism of Tamoxifen. There are lots of others that are available. Best of luck to you:)

By the way, love your head

hugs
jan

tasha_111

phoenixrising said:

I honestly cannot imagine
I honestly cannot imagine you being a b****. But you seem to think so, so something must be wrong for sure. One thing that might help is splitting your Tamoxifen and taking 1/2 in the am and 1/2 at night. This made a huge difference in my mood. Another thing, if you go on anti-depressants, don't take an SSRI as they interfere with the metabolism of Tamoxifen. There are lots of others that are available. Best of luck to you:)

By the way, love your head

hugs
jan

NOWAY!!
You may be less tolerant of fools but you could never be a b1tch!
Hugs Jxxxxxxx...PS. You look great!

tjhay

tasha_111 said:

NOWAY!!
You may be less tolerant of fools but you could never be a b1tch!
Hugs Jxxxxxxx...PS. You look great!

Ok maybe I am just being
Ok maybe I am just being seriouly cranky. I am already on a mood stabelizer for anxiety, so will call my phycologist, which means I will have to talk to the phychiatrist for somthing stronger. I all ready split the tomax up, as per my oncologist. I just know that I feel like throwing things, at ppl all the time, and that my sister seriouly thinks that I am loosing it. It is rare that she and I agree. haha
I will call my dr in the morning.
Thanks everyone
Tjhay

Lelana

tjhay said:

Ok maybe I am just being
Ok maybe I am just being seriouly cranky. I am already on a mood stabelizer for anxiety, so will call my phycologist, which means I will have to talk to the phychiatrist for somthing stronger. I all ready split the tomax up, as per my oncologist. I just know that I feel like throwing things, at ppl all the time, and that my sister seriouly thinks that I am loosing it. It is rare that she and I agree. haha
I will call my dr in the morning.
Thanks everyone
Tjhay

Hissy fits !
Hello there tjhay !
My name is Tom, Loni's husband.
Loni could no longer take the medicine for menapause because cancer cells feed off of them.
She now takes "Evening Prime Rose Oil" gel tablets, and they do work ! There safe and can be bought at any drug store or grocery store. I'm the one on the receiving end of what your talking about, so when I say it works, you can believe me !
Also I told my adopted daughter about them and now she thinks I'm a genius and the best Dad ever !
Please give them a try, you will notice a difference right away !
Ask your doctor about them of course, to make sure it is safe for you. They are sold along with vitamines and such, and no prescription is needed. And the are cheap, compared to what a shrink would cost ! A lot of doctors will laugh at this, but you will be amazed !
Trust me if they didn't work, I'd be nuts by now !
Take care, Tom and Loni

CR1954

Tj......
I'm really sorry. Menopause can be a b**** any way you slice it! Right after my hysterectomy, I was put on anti-depressants. I am still a b**** a lot of times, but I would hate to think what I would be like without them!

Hang in there, as RE said, it does get better.

Hugs,

CR

LilSister

There is nothing to help but hormones
2 years since I found my cancer. There is nothing for the menopause but hormones. My cancer was triple negative so, against my oncologist wished, I am on hormones. Haven't felt this good in 2 years. Think about it. The highest rate of breast cancer is in older women, women that have already gone thru menopause and already have stopped producing hormones !! What the doctors are saying doesn't make any since. Plus I was ER & PR negative, no lymphnode involvment. My sister went thru mastectomy, flap reconstruction, radiation, 5 horrible years on Tomoxaphen, just to have it come back as triple negative in the other breast 5 years later. Then she did it all over again, just to have it spread to her brain 2 years later. Then to go thru radiaion, then surgery, only to die 9 months later. I say live as well as you can for as long as you can and be happy !!!

Kat11

LilSister said:

There is nothing to help but hormones
2 years since I found my cancer. There is nothing for the menopause but hormones. My cancer was triple negative so, against my oncologist wished, I am on hormones. Haven't felt this good in 2 years. Think about it. The highest rate of breast cancer is in older women, women that have already gone thru menopause and already have stopped producing hormones !! What the doctors are saying doesn't make any since. Plus I was ER & PR negative, no lymphnode involvment. My sister went thru mastectomy, flap reconstruction, radiation, 5 horrible years on Tomoxaphen, just to have it come back as triple negative in the other breast 5 years later. Then she did it all over again, just to have it spread to her brain 2 years later. Then to go thru radiaion, then surgery, only to die 9 months later. I say live as well as you can for as long as you can and be happy !!!

At the risk of sounding like
At the risk of sounding like I push drugs, Thats what you need. Call you doctor, there is some great meds out there to help you get through this. A lot of us are on meds for this reason. Then you won't have to worry about getting kicked out. LOL I know been there done that.

Alexis F

Kat11 said:

At the risk of sounding like
At the risk of sounding like I push drugs, Thats what you need. Call you doctor, there is some great meds out there to help you get through this. A lot of us are on meds for this reason. Then you won't have to worry about getting kicked out. LOL I know been there done that.

Talk to your oncologist
Talk to your oncologist about changing your medication to something else. There are alot of antidepressants and antianxiety pills out there. Find one that works.

Good luck TJ!

luana56

walk it out
Hi Tjhay,

When I get angry I go for a brisk walk. Iam scrimming, cursing and yelling at everyone but only in my mind. The angrier I get the faster I walk. Sometime I start running never stopping to scream. Nobody knows what I do except that I walk or run. This helps me a lot.
Coming back home I am feeling tried and emotionally much better. My anger is gone(at least for a while) and I take a nap.
It works for me. Maybe you could try. It might help.
And remember all this is only temporary.

DianeBC

luana56 said:

walk it out
Hi Tjhay,

When I get angry I go for a brisk walk. Iam scrimming, cursing and yelling at everyone but only in my mind. The angrier I get the faster I walk. Sometime I start running never stopping to scream. Nobody knows what I do except that I walk or run. This helps me a lot.
Coming back home I am feeling tried and emotionally much better. My anger is gone(at least for a while) and I take a nap.
It works for me. Maybe you could try. It might help.
And remember all this is only temporary.

Hi Tj. You shouldn't have
Hi Tj. You shouldn't have to feel like this. Talk to you oncologist about this and see what he can do for you. You need to feel good again!

Hugs, Diane

Kristin N

DianeBC said:

Hi Tj. You shouldn't have
Hi Tj. You shouldn't have to feel like this. Talk to you oncologist about this and see what he can do for you. You need to feel good again!

Hugs, Diane

Tj, I am so sorry about the
Tj, I am so sorry about the way you are feeling. Please talk to your doctor and see if you can get on some medication possibly to help you.

Also, I have found that keeping busy does seem to help keep me from dwelling on bc as much.

Good luck Tj!

Kristin

leticia13

hang in there!!!!
yes, it truly sucks, it should get better... I am 39 and was put into menopause during chemo and continued when started Tamoxifen. The crazy emotions should start to balance out. My Dr. did give me a prescription to help me adjust to the crazy hormone fluctuations. I only had to take it for a short time but I was glad I did.

This to like everthing else shall pass you can get through it!

I am a 39 year old one breasted woman with severe hot flashes and sweating issues, my hair is growing back but a bit patchy ( I used to have very long thick hair) There are days when your gonna be well, pissed off. Its ok, go for a walk, meditate something to help you breath a little easier and not react so quickly.

Hang in there and don't be too hard on yourself.

Sincerely,

Leticia

Kylez

leticia13 said:

hang in there!!!!
yes, it truly sucks, it should get better... I am 39 and was put into menopause during chemo and continued when started Tamoxifen. The crazy emotions should start to balance out. My Dr. did give me a prescription to help me adjust to the crazy hormone fluctuations. I only had to take it for a short time but I was glad I did.

This to like everthing else shall pass you can get through it!

I am a 39 year old one breasted woman with severe hot flashes and sweating issues, my hair is growing back but a bit patchy ( I used to have very long thick hair) There are days when your gonna be well, pissed off. Its ok, go for a walk, meditate something to help you breath a little easier and not react so quickly.

Hang in there and don't be too hard on yourself.

Sincerely,

Leticia

Sorry Tj! I do hope you
Sorry Tj! I do hope you feel better soon.

I am reluctant to start the hormone therapy and that is part of the reason.

And, I love your new pic! Your hair looks really cool!

Good luck!

Irishwhispers

Ummmmmmm....
Try contacting the Murphy Office
However, Please note.... You must be properly attired when you
come in for your appointment...
Yannoo.... Tights, Cape, and oh ohoh.. don't forget the Wonder Woman Outfit
I loaned you!

Love you more than my luggage

~T~