Spouse having trouble dealing with your diagnosis?

jk1952

tasha_111 said:

Mine
Is so totally jealous of having my son in the house.............

I am so sorry for what some
I am so sorry for what some of you are dealing with. If we can help in any way, let us know.

Even the best husbands don't always respond the way we'd like them to. Sometimes it's just because they're wired differently than we are. Sometimes because they're clueless, and we just have to tell them our feeling and needs. Sometimes they are afraid: I truly believe that the person that has a problem can often deal better with the problem than the loving partner. Sometimes they are just jerks.

I wish us all well in dealing with whatever type of husband we have, and in any decisions that we need to make about our relationships and communications with them.

Joyce

outdoorgirl

tasha_111 said:

Mine
Is so totally jealous of having my son in the house.............

Sounds like
you guys should either be knocking sense into these guys or kicking them out on their behinds and getting new locks for your doors!!! Pisses me off how they treat the both of you!

crazylady55

outdoorgirl said:

Sounds like
you guys should either be knocking sense into these guys or kicking them out on their behinds and getting new locks for your doors!!! Pisses me off how they treat the both of you!

I agree with outdoorgirl
I agree with outdoorgirl. Time to find new guys. Noone deserves to be treated badly.

My husband has been great the whole time, although when I was diagnosed I think he was even more scared than me. I had to reassure hime that I have no intention of dying from this. He sat with me during every chemo and goes to all my doctor's visits. He keeps telling everyone how I have hair now, I guess it's a sign to him that I am getting better. Now that I am so afraid of recurrence he keeps assuring me that I will be ok. I guess thats why we have been together for 36 years (married for almost 30).

ladybug22

tasha_111 said:

My Husband
Was a complete swine........He told me I deserved to have cancer because my family were Heathens....They don't hold hands, say grace or go to church..(Like he does?????) The night before my first chemo, he told me it isn't worth going, it wouldn't work........This was at 3 am. He had more of a problem with it than I did, I hope your predicament is better than mine.

Hugs Jxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

TASHA
He is no husband i want call him a guy hes a jack .You should never have to put up with all the bull .Sounds like he needs to go nut house

Noel

crazylady55 said:

I agree with outdoorgirl
I agree with outdoorgirl. Time to find new guys. Noone deserves to be treated badly.

My husband has been great the whole time, although when I was diagnosed I think he was even more scared than me. I had to reassure hime that I have no intention of dying from this. He sat with me during every chemo and goes to all my doctor's visits. He keeps telling everyone how I have hair now, I guess it's a sign to him that I am getting better. Now that I am so afraid of recurrence he keeps assuring me that I will be ok. I guess thats why we have been together for 36 years (married for almost 30).

So sorry Jackie and Tasha.
So sorry Jackie and Tasha. You deserve to be treated better!

survivorbc09

jk1952 said:

I am so sorry for what some
I am so sorry for what some of you are dealing with. If we can help in any way, let us know.

Even the best husbands don't always respond the way we'd like them to. Sometimes it's just because they're wired differently than we are. Sometimes because they're clueless, and we just have to tell them our feeling and needs. Sometimes they are afraid: I truly believe that the person that has a problem can often deal better with the problem than the loving partner. Sometimes they are just jerks.

I wish us all well in dealing with whatever type of husband we have, and in any decisions that we need to make about our relationships and communications with them.

Joyce

I just wanted to say that my
I just wanted to say that my husband and I have sat down and talked openly about my having bc. He actually talked back. He has been very supportive of me, but, he just never said too much about his feelings on my having bc. So, it is a small step, but, a good one. We will talk more later. I didn't want to overwhelm him. So, I feel better now!

Jackie, I am so sorry. I hope that everything between your husband and you get better.

Tasha, why would you stay with someone that talks to you like that? He is a terrible abuser. Get a good divorce attorney and get rid of him and find someone that will treat you decent.

Alexis F

Noel said:

So sorry Jackie and Tasha.
So sorry Jackie and Tasha. You deserve to be treated better!

I find it so sad that some
I find it so sad that some of your loved ones have treated you the way they did. I couldn't live like that with someone like that. I know this is hard on our husbands, but, that is no excuse for vulgar cruelty or ignoring us. I am very lucky I guess, my husband has been with me every step of the way and we do talk a lot about it. I am more fortunate than I even realized after reading some of these posts!

Noel

survivorbc09 said:

I just wanted to say that my
I just wanted to say that my husband and I have sat down and talked openly about my having bc. He actually talked back. He has been very supportive of me, but, he just never said too much about his feelings on my having bc. So, it is a small step, but, a good one. We will talk more later. I didn't want to overwhelm him. So, I feel better now!

Jackie, I am so sorry. I hope that everything between your husband and you get better.

Tasha, why would you stay with someone that talks to you like that? He is a terrible abuser. Get a good divorce attorney and get rid of him and find someone that will treat you decent.

I am glad that your husband
I am glad that your husband and you are talking now more survivorbc09. I am sure it will get even better with time. Men are slow you know. haha Good luck to you!