New Diagnosis....fear is Overwhelming

luvseals

ambientbeats said:

here for you
hi michelle~

i'm new to this board but am hear to support and listen. like everyone here, i can relate to your fears. cancer is a terrifying thing and i'm just learning how to live with/alongside it or as i say to my friends and family how to "wear it." it's good that you are articulating your feelings. the last thing you want is to keep it in and just marinate in it.

oscar wilde said: "we are all in the gutter. some of us are looking at the stars." recognizing where you are is important. but more importantly, know that there are stars out there to gaze upon. there's hope. and we're rooting you on!

hugs and blessings,
cece

Thank you...
Cece:
Thank you so much for the comments. I definetly agree with you about getting the feelings out because otherwise they will consume you and eat you. It has really helped talking with people also in the sense that the more knowledge you have helps reduce the fear too by giving you a little more control regarding whats available and what things help during treatment, etc. etc. Your quote really offers food for thought. Yes there is hope and I am going to grab it and run with it. I hope we all will all beat this disease and enjoy the stars.
Hugs and blessings to you too, Michele

luvseals

kayandok said:

fear
Dear luvseals, sorry to hear you are overwhelmed with fear. I have an 18 year old and two 11 year olds and can relate to your feelings very well about not wanting to leave them. I have to process that one a lot.

I was dx 6-07 with 3C and had to process a lot of fear and other feelings. I am just finishing my 2nd line chemo. I don't seem to be going into remission. What has given me strength to face my fears are my faith in God, arming myself with all the best facts and info out there, journaling, trusted friends, and a counselor. We all process differently, but the key is to process and to run all the stuff through you (just like the chemo).

My prayers are with you. May you find peace of mind and strength to face your fears.

Warm hugs,
kathleen

fear
Kathleen:
I am so sorry you are having trouble with this monster too. I have always been a big part of my girls lives, gone to all their activities, helped them with everything, from school to boys etc. etc. Even my oldest who just turned 20 lives at home and goes to college and we are Extemely close, do everything together and talk about every subject possible, we are the best of friends and so even though she is now technically an adult I still feel like she needs me and I need her, so this in and of itself makes it scary not to mention how much the 11 year old needs. I really feel for you and your 3 children. I absolutly know this disease is terrifying at any age but that component seems to make it even worse for me. I am going to work with all the tools I have to help get me through this and it indeed is a journey, certainly not one anyone wants to take but in the end we will all be stronger for having gone on it and made it! May you and everyone who fights this monster prevail at the end of the battle. Love and blessings, Michele

luvseals

lindaprocopio said:

CECE: I like "In the darkness you can see the stars"
MICHELE: I'm glad that my research and experience is helpful to anyone else going through this. At least something good comes of all we go through, in the new friendships we make and new knowledge that we can share. Internet research is a big part of my job (I own a small grantwriting company: www.procopiofundraising.com), so it is instinctive and easy for me to do research into anything and everything. I was one of those children that wears out a set of encyclopedias looking things up, and the internet has been a LIFE-CHANGER for me, as a go-to place for my insatiable curiosity about every new thing that I see, experience, or think of. I guess 'cancer' has captured my imagination now that it has captured my body. (blush)

You can have carbonated drinks if you let them sit out awhile and get flat before you drink them. It's the gas that can make you uncomfortable. And you can have coffee, but you just can't count caffeinated drinks as a part of your "daily 64 ounces" as they do not hydrate effectively. I was told to drink an EXTRA cup of water for every cup of coffee I drink. (I need coffee to start my day!) Naturally decaffeinated green tea is a good choice (I'd drink maybe 4 cups of that daily); and water, of course. Sugar-y drinks can also play havoc with your digestion. That's why I watered down my cranberry juice, to get MORE fluid in me, since I don't think drinking 64 ounces of straight cranberry juice would be good for my poor intestines!! I really missed having a glass of wine in the evening, but when I did have a glass at a birthday party, I felt so nauseous that it wasn't worth it and I didn't do it again. The radiation rounds days go by fast, as you are there 5 days a week and it flies by. You can do this! You'll be glad that you did everything you could personally to make this go well; it's empowering to play an active role in your treatments by being responsible with what you consume. ((((Michele))))

tips
Linda:
You have given me some wonderful ideas and I plan to definetly use them. I am not a coffee or tea drinker, have never liked either one, so I won't be missing that. I don't care for flat soda, so I guess I will just skip that and drink like cystal light and sugar free koolaid and some water (just not a big water drinker...lol) I am so glad to hear that the radiation days go by quickly. The suggestions you made were great too and I am going to follow them. You are indeed an amazing person to be going through all of this and reaching out to others in the way that you do. I told my family about you, in particular my husband and I told him what valuable information you have given me and what a sweet nature you have. To be giving so much to others in the middle of your own battle is very heart warming. My husband keeps asking me, where is she from and I keep saying "I forgot to ask" so now I am asking...where are you from? (lol) We live in Fort Worth, Tx are orig. from Minnesota and actually do miss that weather, way to hot here in the summer. You are definetly an angel and your halo glows in your picture, it's beautiful!

BonnieR

kayandok said:

fear
Dear luvseals, sorry to hear you are overwhelmed with fear. I have an 18 year old and two 11 year olds and can relate to your feelings very well about not wanting to leave them. I have to process that one a lot.

I was dx 6-07 with 3C and had to process a lot of fear and other feelings. I am just finishing my 2nd line chemo. I don't seem to be going into remission. What has given me strength to face my fears are my faith in God, arming myself with all the best facts and info out there, journaling, trusted friends, and a counselor. We all process differently, but the key is to process and to run all the stuff through you (just like the chemo).

My prayers are with you. May you find peace of mind and strength to face your fears.

Warm hugs,
kathleen

Amen
Dearest Kathleen and luvseals,

I just wanted to say amen to finding the strength by giving your fears to God. I visualize placing them in his hands or at his feet. This helps so much for if I try to carry them myself the burden becomes overwhelming and weight of them unbearable. I also pray you find peace and comfort. Post here often, it really helps and maybe journal if you don't already. Sometimes just writing our feelings down gives relief. Hugs ♥ Prayers Bonnie

Don't let FEAR rule your life. FEAR = False expectations appearing real

chiller

luvseals said:

Tips
Linda:
Thank you sooo much for all the valuable tips. The one thing that will be hard for me is the no carbonated drinks, as I do drink quite a few diet soft drinks. I am not a big water drinker either, but I will certainly work at it. Sugar free koolaid and lemonade etc. would be great if that would be acceptable. I love cranberry juice so that would work well too. Thank you for all the Great suggestions. You are a wonderful person to be so helpful to so many. I have noticed that you reply to many posts and let me tell you I really appreciate it. You are indeed very special...BIG BIG Love & Hugs to you! Michele (luvseals)

Propel
I'm not a big water drinker either. If you like cranberry juice you might like one of the Propel flavored waters. My favorite is kiwi-strawberry. I've tried other flavored water but I didn't like most of them.