young mom / wife

breastcancer.posse
breastcancer.posse Member Posts: 4
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
So, this is my first attempt to reach out to other breast cancer diagnoses. I am 32 and was diagnosed with Invasive Ductal Carcinoma in January. I have endured a dbl mastectomy on April 10th and have completed 1 treatment of Chemo this past Wednesday….1 down and 7 more to go. I have a 6yr old daughter who is definitely my strength and a husband who is my joy….. this might sound a bit backwards but it is true. She keeps me going and he keeps be laughing. We have a wonderful support system of Family and Friends, I am very blessed. They are all so awesome and are totally here for us…it’s just none of them can directly relate. I guess I have come here to find others who “KNOW” what I’m talking about, who know how it feels and who know that even behind the humor and perseverance to kick butt there are still the moments of frustration and blah!

Comments

  • CR1954
    CR1954 Member Posts: 1,390 Member
    Hello and welcome........
    Hello and welcome to the board, although I'm sorry for your dx.

    Yes, everyone here has been there, done that or is about to travel that challenging road. All here understand the fear and the frustration, not to mention the physical and emotional toll that cancer takes. And most importantly, we all walk with each other, offering support and hope, ecouragement and answers...and laughter too!

    It sounds like you have a wonderful and supportive family! That is a very good thing, indeed!

    Please make yourself at home here and don't be afraid to ask or vent or make us all giggle! For many of us, this board gives us the confidence and true hope to fight and conquer and become survivors!

    All my best,
    CR
  • zahalene
    zahalene Member Posts: 670
    Glad you found us.
    This is a great place for support, comfort and practical help as well.
    I was dx at age 38 with a one year old and a twelve year old. Two mastectomies in less than two years, two rounds of chemo, rads, tamoxifen...
    But all that began 23 years ago next month. Just wanted to let you know that this is DOABLE and SURVIVABLE and there is LIFE after bc and it is GOOD.
    Please don't hesitate to be frank and honest here with whatever is going on with you. It is true that no matter how much others love us, they just can't enter into this as fully as can those who have been there. That does not make their support any less valuable, or us any less appreciative of them and every effort they put forth for us. God bless our caregivers.
    And God bless you.
  • Moopy23
    Moopy23 Member Posts: 1,751 Member
    Hello and Welcome
    CR and Zahalene in their posts have said it all better than I can, but I also welcome you, though I am sorry for the reason.

    You will find a remarkable group of women here who truly understand how you feel and what you are going through. It is true that, however much family and friends love and support you, only other cancer survivors truly know and understand.

    I had a mastectomy in November and have just completed 6 rounds of chemo; now I am getting ready for radiation treatments. I will be glad to help you any way I can. Please don't hesitate to ask questions, comment, or just vent.
  • Kat11
    Kat11 Member Posts: 1,931 Member
    Your in the right place now.
    Your in the right place now. This site has helped me so very much, and I have asked a lot of questions and I always get an answer. It's a good place to vent, no one will get mad at you. I just can't believe how many of us are out there with Breast cancer !!
    Kathy
  • Christmas Girl
    Christmas Girl Member Posts: 3,682 Member
    Warm welcome, young mom / wife...
    Though sorry for the reason you're here. You've joined the perfect group, kind-hearted all, willing to help & share, support & encourage. Everyone is either where you are at right now, or has already been there. No matter how loving & steadfast our families & friends may be, yes - it is a unique experience to be within the circle of cancer survivors vs. outside of it.

    I'm an almost 6 year survivor; and, many here are well beyond me. I hope knowing this provides YOU with HOPE! Breast cancer IS one of the most survivable types of the disease.

    Kind regards, Susan
  • mimivac
    mimivac Member Posts: 2,143
    Another young wife
    We can all relate to your moments (or longer!) of frustration and blah. Glad you found us and very happy that you have such a supportive family. That is so important. Way to go on completing that first chemo treatment. Once you know how you will react, things often get easier and you are able to manage many of your symptoms. I finished chemo in April and started rads in May. It's amazing how the time goes. It seems like just yesterday I was starting chemo like you. Now I am a "graduate" and you will be, too.

    I was diagnosed six months ago at the age of 34. A site I find particularly helpful is youngsurvival.org. It caters to breast cancer survivors who are under 40, and its members discuss many of the unique issues of young breast cancer, such as raising young children, fertility, dense breast tissue, etc. If you click on the "YSC Community" tab on the menu on the left of the page, you will get another menu. Then click on "Bulletin Board" and then pick "General." There you can talk to other young breast cancer survivors (there are over 24,000 of them registered) in a discussion board like this one. Feel free to PM me if you want more info. I'll look for you on the site.

    Keep writing and asking those questions. We are here for you.

    Mimi
  • cats_toy
    cats_toy Member Posts: 1,462 Member
    I can only echo the sentiments from the others
    They have all said it very well. Welcome and sorry you are here! I am two years out of my surgery and just had my mammo today with clear results. Your family and friends are a great support group and we can also be here for anything you may need to ask, vent (as I did last nite) or celebrate. Keep those spirits up!
    =^..^=
  • djteach
    djteach Member Posts: 273
    Hi,
    Welcome to the board.

    Hi,
    Welcome to the board. You are just finishing up what I call the whirlwind. Everything happens so fast that you can hardly get your breath. I hate to see anyone have b/c, but one so young is not fair. Of course you know by now that cancer is not fair. Are you estrogen+ or neg.? Are you HER2+? What chemo drugs are you taking? Boy, I'm nosey, huh?

    I am so glad that you have a wonderful support system. It truly makes all the difference in the world as well as that positive attitude. You can come here anytime, 24/7 and you will find the support you need. I think this is one of the most caring, empathic group on the net. I must warn you though that laughing until you cry or pee may be a side effect of this board! You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

    Love and gentle hugs,
    Donna
  • tatooedinpink
    tatooedinpink Member Posts: 95
    Thinking of you...
    Welcome to this group. You will appreciate the fellowship, advice, humor, and care from your fellow survivors.
    I am a little over a year beyond you in treatment. Believe it or not, it will pass quickly and one year from now, you will be so proud of yourself, and have new admiration and stronger love for your family and friends.

    Will be thinking of you and keep you in my prayers,

    Debbie
  • rjjj
    rjjj Member Posts: 1,822 Member
    young mom/wife
    I am so very sorry you had to have this diagnosis so early on in life. But you are young and strong and you will beat this. You have so much joy to look forward to. You are blessed with strength and joy from your family and you will also be blessed here with support from all the courageous warrior sisters/brothers here. We do "KNOW" how it is and we get it. Keep talking to us here you will never regret it, I promise. Anything at all.
    Love Jackie
  • breastcancer.posse
    breastcancer.posse Member Posts: 4
    mimivac said:

    Another young wife
    We can all relate to your moments (or longer!) of frustration and blah. Glad you found us and very happy that you have such a supportive family. That is so important. Way to go on completing that first chemo treatment. Once you know how you will react, things often get easier and you are able to manage many of your symptoms. I finished chemo in April and started rads in May. It's amazing how the time goes. It seems like just yesterday I was starting chemo like you. Now I am a "graduate" and you will be, too.

    I was diagnosed six months ago at the age of 34. A site I find particularly helpful is youngsurvival.org. It caters to breast cancer survivors who are under 40, and its members discuss many of the unique issues of young breast cancer, such as raising young children, fertility, dense breast tissue, etc. If you click on the "YSC Community" tab on the menu on the left of the page, you will get another menu. Then click on "Bulletin Board" and then pick "General." There you can talk to other young breast cancer survivors (there are over 24,000 of them registered) in a discussion board like this one. Feel free to PM me if you want more info. I'll look for you on the site.

    Keep writing and asking those questions. We are here for you.

    Mimi

    Thank you for the info.
    So, I have noticed alot of BC patients have undergone Chemo and Rads....do they generally go hand in hand? So, far I have not gotten a straght answer from my Oncologist as to wether or not I will need rads or once chemo is over I'm done.

    Hey, if you don't mind me asking.... how long did it take for you to lose your hair? I went wig shopping today and found 2 that I liked and purchesed. However, my hair is doing better right now then it had been doing prior to this.????????????
    "
    I keep telling myself not to get my hopes up and just except that it's going to happen. My daughter asked if it will all fall out like the "Harry Potter tree", it losses it's leavs all in one shake.

    Thank you again for all the info.

    With much appriciation- Shelly
  • tommaseena
    tommaseena Member Posts: 1,769
    rjjj said:

    young mom/wife
    I am so very sorry you had to have this diagnosis so early on in life. But you are young and strong and you will beat this. You have so much joy to look forward to. You are blessed with strength and joy from your family and you will also be blessed here with support from all the courageous warrior sisters/brothers here. We do "KNOW" how it is and we get it. Keep talking to us here you will never regret it, I promise. Anything at all.
    Love Jackie

    young mom/wife
    I am older than you are. I am 45 diagnosed with DCIS with invasion no Dec. 2008. Had a double mastectomy on my 45th birthday(2/2) with tissue expanders no lymph node involvement. I am HER2+ and hormone negative. I did not have to have radiation. I had 4 rounds of AC and then am now on Taxol w/Herceptin(I have done 2 out of 12) and then I will be on Herceptin alone every 3 wks for one year. My hair fell out the day after my second treatment of AC--everyone is different. I chose not to get a wig--I wear hats and bandannas or nothing at all except sun screen.

    My son is almost 6 and has been a trooper and helper to me. Kids get you through this.

    Keep coming to the site and any questions you have or any information that you find and want to share is more than welcome by all here--survivors and caregivers are wonderful people here.

    Hugs,
    Margo
  • EveningStar2
    EveningStar2 Member Posts: 491 Member

    Thank you for the info.
    So, I have noticed alot of BC patients have undergone Chemo and Rads....do they generally go hand in hand? So, far I have not gotten a straght answer from my Oncologist as to wether or not I will need rads or once chemo is over I'm done.

    Hey, if you don't mind me asking.... how long did it take for you to lose your hair? I went wig shopping today and found 2 that I liked and purchesed. However, my hair is doing better right now then it had been doing prior to this.????????????
    "
    I keep telling myself not to get my hopes up and just except that it's going to happen. My daughter asked if it will all fall out like the "Harry Potter tree", it losses it's leavs all in one shake.

    Thank you again for all the info.

    With much appriciation- Shelly

    I am not a doctor
    But the short answer seems to be that if you have breast tissue on the affected side, it needs radiation. If it is all removed, you don't.

    Maureen
  • JoyD
    JoyD Member Posts: 81

    young mom/wife
    I am older than you are. I am 45 diagnosed with DCIS with invasion no Dec. 2008. Had a double mastectomy on my 45th birthday(2/2) with tissue expanders no lymph node involvement. I am HER2+ and hormone negative. I did not have to have radiation. I had 4 rounds of AC and then am now on Taxol w/Herceptin(I have done 2 out of 12) and then I will be on Herceptin alone every 3 wks for one year. My hair fell out the day after my second treatment of AC--everyone is different. I chose not to get a wig--I wear hats and bandannas or nothing at all except sun screen.

    My son is almost 6 and has been a trooper and helper to me. Kids get you through this.

    Keep coming to the site and any questions you have or any information that you find and want to share is more than welcome by all here--survivors and caregivers are wonderful people here.

    Hugs,
    Margo

    Glad to know you....
    I was diagnosed in January 2009. Underwent radical masectomy on my left breast. Had a port put in last March. Now, just finished 4 rounds of AC+Avastin (clinical study). May 27, I will be starting my Taxol 12 round treatment and hopefully get into another clinical study called "Biphosphonaes (treatment of bone metastases)".

    Like you, I was hoping that it would not fall out. I ended up shaving my head after 16 days of the 1st chemo therapy, since I noticed that strands of my hair were falling out. I wanted to be in control of the situation and that is the reason why I shaved it.

    If you have questions pls let us know. Someone will always get back to you.

    Joy
  • Christmas Girl
    Christmas Girl Member Posts: 3,682 Member

    Thank you for the info.
    So, I have noticed alot of BC patients have undergone Chemo and Rads....do they generally go hand in hand? So, far I have not gotten a straght answer from my Oncologist as to wether or not I will need rads or once chemo is over I'm done.

    Hey, if you don't mind me asking.... how long did it take for you to lose your hair? I went wig shopping today and found 2 that I liked and purchesed. However, my hair is doing better right now then it had been doing prior to this.????????????
    "
    I keep telling myself not to get my hopes up and just except that it's going to happen. My daughter asked if it will all fall out like the "Harry Potter tree", it losses it's leavs all in one shake.

    Thank you again for all the info.

    With much appriciation- Shelly

    Hi, Shelly...
    Chemo and rads do not always go "hand in hand"... Some patients have one or the other, or neither. Too much depends on the specifics of both diagnosis and the patient. I'm not sure why you haven't gotten a "straight answer" yet from your onc. Maybe he's waiting for completion of chemo first, before he makes a recommendation for rads.

    Hard to say about your own hair loss. Again, too much depends on your specific chemo: which drugs, what dosages, etc. My own hair thinned quite a bit, all over, after my first chemo and just before the second treatment (which were three weeks apart). Just a few days after my second, it fell out completely - at first in big handfuls, leaving bald patches. Within 24 hours after that, it was all gone. I had taken the good advice of my nurses and cut my hair to about a one inch length (from much longer, shoulder length) all over before even beginning chemo

    Best wishes to you.

    Kind regards, Susan

    P.S.: Your daughter sounds adorable! I'm sure your love for her provides much inner strength for you.
  • NeNe60
    NeNe60 Member Posts: 11
    Welcome to this wonderful group!
    It is always so sad for me to know that young mothers are struggling to fight breast cancer and trying to raise a family. However, I do know that having something positive in your life to fight for is one of your true sources of saying, "BC you are not going to win this battle because I am here to fight all the way!" Those of us who have been fortunate enough to help pave the way for all BC fighters know that this battle can be won.

    I am so glad that you have such great support and of course there is always our, "Great Healer" from above who can walk with us every step of the way.

    Take care and please know that this is a great site for wonderful support.

    NeNe 60