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  • CherylHutch
    CherylHutch Member Posts: 1,375

    That was a good post Cheryl
    That was a good post Cheryl and your right, no-one can answer the questions.

    I say to myself everyday, I wish and why all the time. For someone so young, 2 year old girl and a hard worker its just unreal how things change and your life is ruined.

    He has an appointment next week to see if the stents have worked and if chemo can happen but hes still badly jaundiced, is now 133 pounds and at 6 foot thats so skinny.

    The nurse commented on how yellow he is and even if the stents did work he would be to weak for chemo. I used to believe in God but lost my faith since everything ive prayed for never happened. Just got more bad news each week.

    Wish everything could go back to normal and I was moaning about the usual things, work, money etc. but now our lives are changed forever and we will never be happy again x

    Oh dear heart... I hear you and feel some of your pain. Obviously, I do not feel the same as you and would be lying if I said I did since I'm not in the same situation as you are. But although, right now, you can't see the forest for the trees and it looks like an every spiralling dark tunnel you are going through, please don't give up on the fact for all the darkness, there will be light as well.

    It will take some time to get over what you all have been experiencing and you are right, you will never ever forget this time or your brother. But time and the human brain has ways of allowing you to cope through the worst of times and then taking care of dulling the edges of pain as time goes on because NO ONE could ever possibly live the rest of their lives in this much pain. It won't happen over night, but with time, you'll start noticing the little things and then it will get better... and the edges will become less defined.

    And you must remember, you have this adorable 2 year old niece who is going to grow into the most wonderful, inquisitive child and for her sake, you are going to want to show her a world of love and caring and all things beautiful. Right this very minute, it wouldn't be possible... abut as she grows, you are going to want to be a very special part of her life... and that IS going to be such a happy time.

    So yes, you don't have to think about it now, but down the road, things will become happy again. Never the same as before, but happiness will return and it will all of a sudden hit you with no notice :)