PET done today-waiting game

PamPam2

Well, got my Pet scan today. A nerve racking week. At least see my oncologist Monday,so only have the weekend to go. The CT, mamogram and ultrasounds don't look to good, lesion on liver, abnormal mamogram and lump under arm. Had my last chemo in 2005 for met. colon cancer. My oncologist is talking about sending me to James Cancer Center in Columbus University Hospital this time if PET scans warrant, I don't think there are any surgeons in our town who take my medical card now anyway. Feels so unreal, just getting back on my feet, had my port removed last year, going back to school at 50 to learn IT computer work, now this. I know a lot of you on this site are going through the same or worse. Just started posting here lately. Just looking for others to talk with. Got into a few of the other threads lately, it's helping some. Look forward to hearing from anyone. Pam

tootsie1

Hi
Pam,

We'll be praying for you and hoping you don't have to start walking that hard road again. I'm glad you found this site right when you might need us the most. Please come on often and let us hold your hand, okay?

*hugs*

Gail

dixchi

tootsie1 said:

Hi
Pam,

We'll be praying for you and hoping you don't have to start walking that hard road again. I'm glad you found this site right when you might need us the most. Please come on often and let us hold your hand, okay?

*hugs*

Gail

Project
I know myself that if I have a project I am interested in that it helps
ease some of the waiting anxiety......anything to get the mind off the
topic. Maybe immerse yourself in your computer studies this weekend. I get into
worst trouble when I am footloose and don't have anything going on to
catch my interest.
Some on our site have gone thru recurrences and are still here.....that is good
news to remember.

Barbara

PamPam2

dixchi said:

Project
I know myself that if I have a project I am interested in that it helps
ease some of the waiting anxiety......anything to get the mind off the
topic. Maybe immerse yourself in your computer studies this weekend. I get into
worst trouble when I am footloose and don't have anything going on to
catch my interest.
Some on our site have gone thru recurrences and are still here.....that is good
news to remember.

Barbara

Project
Yes, that is my plan. I need to work on several school projects including final projects and exam study, just a little hard to concentrate. I have seen on the discussions that many many people have had multiple reocurrances and are still fighting. At first I kept thinking I just wanted to give up, but little by little,(and I think this site is helping my attitude) I am changing, and getting myself ready for whatever may be, I had a tough diagnosis the first time and low chances (statistic wise that is) but I made it, and I probably can again. I am a fighter and don't give up on anything easily. Thanks for all the positive advise all. Pam

CherylHutch

PamPam2 said:

Project
Yes, that is my plan. I need to work on several school projects including final projects and exam study, just a little hard to concentrate. I have seen on the discussions that many many people have had multiple reocurrances and are still fighting. At first I kept thinking I just wanted to give up, but little by little,(and I think this site is helping my attitude) I am changing, and getting myself ready for whatever may be, I had a tough diagnosis the first time and low chances (statistic wise that is) but I made it, and I probably can again. I am a fighter and don't give up on anything easily. Thanks for all the positive advise all. Pam

Huggggggs!
Sending many, many virtual hugs over your way this weekend, Pam. I, and everyone on this board, can sooooo relate with you and your waiting game. And, no matter what the news, and no matter how an oncologist words it, everything they say or insinuate comes as a shock to our systems. Short of saying, "You have been cured... you'll never get cancer again!" the anxiety of waiting for results, then waiting in a waiting room to get the results... it's amazing any of us get through any of this without having severe anxiety attacks or even heart attacks. I know my friends and family wait on tender hooks to hear the latest results, but I also know the anxiety they go through doesn't come anywhere close to what we all go through while waiting.

You know, it's interesting... in the past, pre-DX, I remember whenever I'd hear of a friend, or a friend of a friend, who had been diagnosed with cancer... the fear/feeling of shock that I'd experience. And then, no matter how upset I was, or how much I felt for them and wanted to know what I could do for them (and I'd do anything in my power to help them)... there was this little part of me, somewhere in the back of my mind, breathing a sigh of relief that it was someone else, not ME being given that DX. Well, I no longer can breathe that sigh of relief, because now it IS me, and because of that, I've met all of YOU. It's something we all have in common that those who don't have cancer can never really say they totally understand. They understand the fear, the anxiety of knowing someone close who has cancer, but they don't understand the fear/anxiety of actually having cancer and what that means.

When my friends had the Celebration of Life and Friendship party for me back in October, of course I had to get up and speak a few words (and like my posts, I babbled on for more than a few minutes )... and one of the subjects I talked about was the fact that everyone was here at the party to support me and there are no words that can truly thank everyone for being there... but at the same time, I had to acknowledge their fears/anxiety. So I talked to them about this... that it is OKAY for people to want to help, want to support and yet still not understand exactly what the person going through cancer is going through. That's ok... and it's too bad there are not more people who DON'T understand... but in this day and age, more and more people are being affected personally with their own DX. There is a good side and a bad side to everything. The bad side... we all have cancer and now live in fear of it returning bigger and worse than ever. The good side, more and more people know exactly what someone else is going through.. so we are here for each other and we really mean it when we say, "I know exactly the feelings/fears/anxieties you are going through this weekend while you wait".

And Pam... when you do hear whatever news you hear, we all will be here for you, in all our corners of North America. We'll be here to hold you up and keep you fighting if it's news you don't want to hear... and we'll be here to celebrate and cheer if it's news that is totally treatable.

So if nothing else, be thankful you've found your way back to this site because you have friends here even though you've never met any of us in person

Huggggggs,

Cheryl

PamPam2

CherylHutch said:

Huggggggs!
Sending many, many virtual hugs over your way this weekend, Pam. I, and everyone on this board, can sooooo relate with you and your waiting game. And, no matter what the news, and no matter how an oncologist words it, everything they say or insinuate comes as a shock to our systems. Short of saying, "You have been cured... you'll never get cancer again!" the anxiety of waiting for results, then waiting in a waiting room to get the results... it's amazing any of us get through any of this without having severe anxiety attacks or even heart attacks. I know my friends and family wait on tender hooks to hear the latest results, but I also know the anxiety they go through doesn't come anywhere close to what we all go through while waiting.

You know, it's interesting... in the past, pre-DX, I remember whenever I'd hear of a friend, or a friend of a friend, who had been diagnosed with cancer... the fear/feeling of shock that I'd experience. And then, no matter how upset I was, or how much I felt for them and wanted to know what I could do for them (and I'd do anything in my power to help them)... there was this little part of me, somewhere in the back of my mind, breathing a sigh of relief that it was someone else, not ME being given that DX. Well, I no longer can breathe that sigh of relief, because now it IS me, and because of that, I've met all of YOU. It's something we all have in common that those who don't have cancer can never really say they totally understand. They understand the fear, the anxiety of knowing someone close who has cancer, but they don't understand the fear/anxiety of actually having cancer and what that means.

When my friends had the Celebration of Life and Friendship party for me back in October, of course I had to get up and speak a few words (and like my posts, I babbled on for more than a few minutes )... and one of the subjects I talked about was the fact that everyone was here at the party to support me and there are no words that can truly thank everyone for being there... but at the same time, I had to acknowledge their fears/anxiety. So I talked to them about this... that it is OKAY for people to want to help, want to support and yet still not understand exactly what the person going through cancer is going through. That's ok... and it's too bad there are not more people who DON'T understand... but in this day and age, more and more people are being affected personally with their own DX. There is a good side and a bad side to everything. The bad side... we all have cancer and now live in fear of it returning bigger and worse than ever. The good side, more and more people know exactly what someone else is going through.. so we are here for each other and we really mean it when we say, "I know exactly the feelings/fears/anxieties you are going through this weekend while you wait".

And Pam... when you do hear whatever news you hear, we all will be here for you, in all our corners of North America. We'll be here to hold you up and keep you fighting if it's news you don't want to hear... and we'll be here to celebrate and cheer if it's news that is totally treatable.

So if nothing else, be thankful you've found your way back to this site because you have friends here even though you've never met any of us in person

Huggggggs,

Cheryl

Cheryl and All Thanks
Thanks Cheryl. I don't mind long postings, fast reader here ha ha. I did not have a computer nor ever touched one when I was first dx and went through surgeries and chemo. It would have been a blessing to have had this site then, but because of my battle with cancer and survival I have gone back to school, learned a lot about computers, BVR gave me my computer after I did so well my first quarter, and found this site, filled with so many many people, fighting for their lives, and still trying to help others in the same fix. It's helping me cope with what is going on now, I can't imagine not being able to use this site now. Pam

sheri22

PamPam2 said:

Cheryl and All Thanks
Thanks Cheryl. I don't mind long postings, fast reader here ha ha. I did not have a computer nor ever touched one when I was first dx and went through surgeries and chemo. It would have been a blessing to have had this site then, but because of my battle with cancer and survival I have gone back to school, learned a lot about computers, BVR gave me my computer after I did so well my first quarter, and found this site, filled with so many many people, fighting for their lives, and still trying to help others in the same fix. It's helping me cope with what is going on now, I can't imagine not being able to use this site now. Pam

Good luck
Pam Ihad been wondering how you were doing sounds like you have the right attitude for this crap. I know well we all know what you are going thru this site is the best,
I hope everything gets better for you thanks for the update

Sheri22