In-law SIBLINGS

Angelica2003
Angelica2003 Member Posts: 20
edited March 2014 in Prostate Cancer #1
well my last post was about the appointment, this one is about
Brian's sister.


She is driving me up the wall and stepping on my toes. She called
here on the Sunday before Brian and I saw the dr asking if Brian
still was thinking about surgery and if it was for himself or his
family. Then she phone the night of the dr appointment, shhh Brian
and I were BUSY. LOL. Anyways after I told Brian she was just
calling to see what the dr said and that she was coming over the next
day so why can she not wait. That all she wanted to dicuss was the
appointment. He said no she must be calling for another reason. I
was right she asked him about his appointment and questioned his
decission. OOOOHHHH I was really starting to steam up.

The night she came over she got into the discussion with Brian about
his appointment and said to me "I know you love Brian but bottom line
is it is his body and he makes the final decission." Well Brian
kicked me to try to keep me calm. I said "no Brian I need to say
this to her. Look Dolores the Dr has told him that before he makes
his decission final to take his family into concideration cause what
ever he decides also affects us. He has a family. He has a wife. It
is not just HIS decission. Yes his body but I sleep and I am with him
all the time and have to live with his outcome. If he did not want
teh surgery I cannot force him. And if Brian was single I know his
decission would be differnt. But he has me and the kids and our
future and mental states to concider."

She then dropped it cause she knew I was getting upset. But she had
to bring up some imaginary artical in the winnipeg sun that stated
women are having surgery when it is not needed and that the article
said the same about prostate cancer. But convienantly she forgot the
article in her van. I nearly lost it. Brian gave me a kick and bit my
tounge. Brian managed to change the subject right away.

Then she got into it again, I told her the dr that sugested Active
Survalaince had only graduated in 2004. And he had a thing against
women, and that I had a bad vibe with him before he even sat in his
chair. She said "yes I was told. You also had a temper
tantrum."...WTF!!!!!!! Ohhh I went red and heated up. I told he it
was a nervious breakdown. She said no Marla whatever you want to
call it, it was a temper tantrum.... I nearly asked her to leave at
that point. That was uncalled for and disrespectful towards me.

Then she went into the date and said she would come to Manitoba, she
is in ontario, for the 9th till the 15th.

Well surprise I have talked to the hospital and nurses, there will be
NO ONE seeing Brian the day of his surgery and no medical info will
be given to anyone but myself and Brian. If there is something we
feel she should know we will tell her. She is way to nosey. And my
friends and family agree that the day Brian has surgery he will be in
no condition for visits anyways and that should be the time I am with
him.

I am not looking forward to x-mas cause we are going to his sisters.
I swear if she talks about it, (will be 2 just over weeks before
surgery and I will be a wreck) I will lose it on her. I do not care
who is there. Brian says he will talk to her and tell her it is not
up for discussion while he is there and that what she did at our
house was disrespectful towards me. He will tell her to back down.

Yes it is her brother, yes she loves and cares about him. I get and
understand that. But she has to back off and stop stepping into my
space. Brian is my husband. She doesn't have to live with him day
in and day out. She does not sleep with him, I do. She has to
respect me and learn to back down a bit. I am the one that will have
to live with Brian's emotional and physical state after the surgery.
NOT HER.

I just had to blow off some steam. This has been bugging me for days.