bad news

krystiesq

Just when things are going well, you get punched in the stomach. After a year of treatment, highs and lows, changing to a major cancer center, starting treatment again...now this.

After my mom's most recent pet scan in September something on her thyroid showed increased uptake. We went to an ENT specialist, the same on who reattached my dad's ear after a cow tore it off, by that is a whole other story... The ENT didn't seem too impressed said her thyroid felt fine but ordered an ultrasound anyway, just to be thorough.

I made sure to tell the ENT to call me ahead of time with the results. I just got of the phone...Findings: Solid masses throughout the thyroid gland. Many contain coarse calcifications. Considering the partient's history, the most likely etiology is metastasis.

It almost made me throw up. I can't focus at work. I don't know what to tell my mom, or whether to tell her. I can only hope if it is thyroid cancer and treatable by a thyroidectomy.

Please pray for her.

msccolon

pick yourself back up!
This is just another mild road block, Kristi. IF it is cancer, it should be easily treatable and thyroid hormone replacement is very minor. Go for a run to clear your head then go back into fight mode! You are doing an excellent job with all this. I understand the kick in the head possible recurrence presents, but I also know that once the initial shock wears off, you have to pick yourself back up and fight, fight, fight (as trainer posted earlier). You CAN do this. Don't try to carry the weight by yourself, either. Are you expected to pass the news to your mother? Better to let the doc do it, with you by her side. I'm praying for you.
mary

KathiM

I agree, let the doctor tell her...but be there!
Mom will probably take it better than you think. Cancer does that to we survivors. We become stoic about the whole thing.
I remember being told about my subsequent breast cancer, barely 6 months after finishing treatment on the rectal. I looked at my nurse and said "Well, there are 2 things that bother me about this. Number one, I'm definately losing my hair, after being so proud of keeping it thru treatment. Number two, and more important (at which point she grabbed for the tissues, figuring it would be 'why me?'..lol), why the cancer whose color I look TERRIBLE in?????? Now, let's get started so I can get thru this one, too, and go on living!". She almost fell off of her stool from laughter!!! "I must admit, that is the wierdest reaction I have ever heard from that news!" she said.

Take a deep breath. It will work. Just time to 'mount the forces' again. But, first and foremost...have a good cry. And scream into a pillow!!! Know you are supported here.

Hugs, Kathi

krystiesq

KathiM said:

I agree, let the doctor tell her...but be there!
Mom will probably take it better than you think. Cancer does that to we survivors. We become stoic about the whole thing.
I remember being told about my subsequent breast cancer, barely 6 months after finishing treatment on the rectal. I looked at my nurse and said "Well, there are 2 things that bother me about this. Number one, I'm definately losing my hair, after being so proud of keeping it thru treatment. Number two, and more important (at which point she grabbed for the tissues, figuring it would be 'why me?'..lol), why the cancer whose color I look TERRIBLE in?????? Now, let's get started so I can get thru this one, too, and go on living!". She almost fell off of her stool from laughter!!! "I must admit, that is the wierdest reaction I have ever heard from that news!" she said.

Take a deep breath. It will work. Just time to 'mount the forces' again. But, first and foremost...have a good cry. And scream into a pillow!!! Know you are supported here.

Hugs, Kathi

yeah, what a day.
I left work shortly after my first post, called my husband, called my dear friend who is a great support to my mom. Then I went to see my mom. I didn't tell her because I think it best to let her doctor. I actually was planning on going there to take her a canker sore patch for her most recent sore from the camptosar anyway. She has a treatment tomorrow and she is unnerved because of that, so I distracted her as much as I could with where we are going to go this weekend to christmas shop. I cried the whole way home and then I went to see my dog who tore up a bunch of trash at my house but still greeted me at the door with a wagging tail. I drank a glass of red wine for lunch, calmed my nerves emmensely, and then went back to work.

I tell ya, if I could just get my hands around this cancer beast's throat, it wouldn't be a pretty site.

KathiM

krystiesq said:

yeah, what a day.
I left work shortly after my first post, called my husband, called my dear friend who is a great support to my mom. Then I went to see my mom. I didn't tell her because I think it best to let her doctor. I actually was planning on going there to take her a canker sore patch for her most recent sore from the camptosar anyway. She has a treatment tomorrow and she is unnerved because of that, so I distracted her as much as I could with where we are going to go this weekend to christmas shop. I cried the whole way home and then I went to see my dog who tore up a bunch of trash at my house but still greeted me at the door with a wagging tail. I drank a glass of red wine for lunch, calmed my nerves emmensely, and then went back to work.

I tell ya, if I could just get my hands around this cancer beast's throat, it wouldn't be a pretty site.

I believe you would wait in a very, very long line!!
We would ALL jump at the chance to nail the beast!!!

And, come to think of it, we do...it's just the 'collateral damage' that's a bit hard to take!

Wine sounds good...mmmm, my fav is the old classic Cab. I knew I was going to be fine when this started tasting good, again!

Hugs, Kathi

trainer

krystiesq said:

yeah, what a day.
I left work shortly after my first post, called my husband, called my dear friend who is a great support to my mom. Then I went to see my mom. I didn't tell her because I think it best to let her doctor. I actually was planning on going there to take her a canker sore patch for her most recent sore from the camptosar anyway. She has a treatment tomorrow and she is unnerved because of that, so I distracted her as much as I could with where we are going to go this weekend to christmas shop. I cried the whole way home and then I went to see my dog who tore up a bunch of trash at my house but still greeted me at the door with a wagging tail. I drank a glass of red wine for lunch, calmed my nerves emmensely, and then went back to work.

I tell ya, if I could just get my hands around this cancer beast's throat, it wouldn't be a pretty site.

Mount up on wings like eagles
If you have a Bible handy, look up Isaiah 40:31. If not, then Google it. It's the one passage that has helped me focus and bear down on whatever was the issue at the time. If you've ever seen eagles or understand that they "mount" or lock up their wings when facing a storm and then let their wings lift them above it, it's a great metaphor. I think it's a metaphor anyway, never quite sure if it's that or a simile. And I'm never sure if I spell that word right either. The rest of the passage tells you to "Ye shall run and not be weary."

Powerful words to take to heart. I hope they help you and yours.

Mike

pamness

Wow, it is hard to stay positive when things go off course
I think that you decision to let your Mom's doctor tell her the results while you are there is a good one.

People on the board are right, cancer fighters (survivors) are resilient.

Please, hope for the best.

Pam

rrob

Prayers
Kristie,

You and your mom are in my prayers!

Rebecca